Divine and Acquiescent
by IDRC
Summary: Today something terrible happened. I got paired with Craig Tucker for a Geometry project.
1. Project

Today something terrible happened.

Where did I go wrong? It was probably the advance classes. I'm in a place where I can do better than regular but the advance makes me struggle but I always manage to make it through the year with at least a C. I should of just taken the regular classes and then this wouldn't have happened.

In my Geometry class our teacher gave us a project and as if that wasn't already bad she put us in groups for the project. Now, if there were four people in the groups everything would be fine because four people means at least one of them has to be nice enough to not want to kill me and they can protect me from the others.

But, we were placed into pairs.

I don't understand how we're juniors but we can't pick our own groups. Because if that were the case I'd definitely have picked Bebe. She's one of those few persons that don't hate me. She's super nice and pretty and also smart. She's perfect. And I like when she gossips to me. I think she likes me more because I'm gay. She's always asking to take me shopping or something like that.

Pairs are so scary. That's just you and someone else getting to know each other over the course of a week and then never speaking again and holding all those things you learned in your head forever. I'm so awkward! I can't be in a pair. People are so scary! But, that's okay, I always can manage to calm myself down.

Enough, I mean.

That was, until she told me who I was paired with. He's not even here today, yet somehow that makes everything all worse because when he comes back he'll find out and be even more mad. Oh, god! He's gonna kill me, I know he is. There are rumors he's pschotic because he never smiles... Or he never really makes any type of face. People think he's asexual because despite being second most attractive boy at our school he's never dated anyone, ever. Or that I know of... I'm sure he's killed someone. That's why he acts the way he does. He acts like a killer! Like one that gets away with murder too! OH, GOD!

And when he comes back and finds out the teacher paired him with the twitchy gay kid he's gonna kill her! OR ME! OH MY GOD! And I'll die because I have no muscle or any type strength at all! And he's really built.

Okay, not _really _built, but he's bigger than me, man! Who knows what he's got? No one's ever seen him take off his shirt.

When the bell rings I scream at the top of my lungs. As usual. I grab all my shit, shove it in my bag, and rush out of the room. If I don't get coffee I'm gonna pass out. If I don't find Kenny I'm gonna hyperventilate and pass out. And then I'll fall into a coma or something! "GEH!" I speed walk through the crowd of children. This alone could give me a panic attack. I mean, I hate kids. Kids are gross. Usually I wait for the crowds to get smaller. I'm always late but people don't really ever care because... everyone thinks I'm psychotic too.

Something grabs the back of my collar and tugs, yanking me back while also slightly choking me. I yelp and fall backwards. _This is how I die_.. I close my eyes and pray. It's my possum technique. I use it quite regularly.

Instead of falling to my death, I hit something soft and warm that wraps it's arms around my torso. I release a breath of relief and turn around to the hug the dirty blonde in return. I start to ramble about how I'm gonna die tomorrow with little to no spaces between my words and Kenny nods like he understands, he might. When I'm done he lets me go with a smile. "Now," he says, "what?"

My face twists to a distraught one. "Kenny! I'm gonna die tomorrow! We must do something amazing today so that I can handle that!"

"Wanna meditate?"

I grab my hair and scream, "NO! Something amazing! I'm serious! I'm not 'freaking out'- Well, I am _freaking out_\- but I am gonna die and that's why and we need to do something so I can die happy!"

He snorts, "We could fuck." My cheeks flush but it's not a bad idea. One last fuck before I die? "Why are you gonna die?"

My breathing quickly goes back to being crazy and uncontrollable, "I just- I- She put- If I- I wanted Bebe!" Kenny's brows furrow. "'Cause she p-put us- she put us in pairs! GEH!"

He nods, "And who did you get paired with?"

"C-Craig! Craig Tucker!"

Kenny blinks at me. He takes my hands from my hair, gently, but with enough force to actually pry them from my messy hair. "Craig is not going to kill you." He assures me.

"How do you know?"

"Craig's pretty chill, man."

"Really? How do you know?" I repeat, not really satisfied with him not answering my question. That's suspicious. If he doesn't answer it, he could be lying.

Kenny shrugs, "We hang out occasionally. You know I like to group hop." Kenny hangs out with everybody. I think him selling drugs is a big part of it but I don't like to think that because Kenny's really nice and that could be a big part too. Not to mention, he is the most attractive boy at our school. So that, the being friendly and crazy out-going (made me quite jealous), and the drugs probably put him way high on the popularity meter. He's up there with Token and Clyde.

Token and Clyde are popular because of the parties they throw. I mean, Clyde already threw amazing parties but once he started throwing them at Token's huge ass mansion and Token has a lot of money for things like drinks and food and stereos and shit. They just mesh together nicely. I see Craig hanging out with them frequently. That's the only reason he's up there with them on popularity. That _and _being second most attractive. But being fucking weird kinda takes him down on the popularity.

I look at Kenny with uneasy eyes. "You want me to talk to him?" He asks. I shrug. "He's right over there."

My heart stops. "B-But he's not here today."

"Probably just skipped that class." Kenny explains.

"No,no,no,no,no-" I pull out of Kenny's arms. "Lunch." Is all I say to get away from the blonde, glancing over my shoulder once I'm three-fourths the way down the hall to just verify that the noirette was in fact at the other end with Clyde, Token, and now Kenny. Just conversating.

He doesn't look like he's listening to them. His eyes shoot up though as soon as I look at them and I scream, taking off towards the stairwell, only a few feet away now.

Once I'm out of the hallway, I squat and hold my head, trying to catch my breath. _That was close_. He probably has madusa-vision and can freeze people with his icy stare. His blue eyes are so cold and piercing, they're _deadly_.

I start praying again because I don't care what Kenny thinks of Craig, I know he's a murderer and I know the probability of me dying this week is at an all time high.

At lunch I somehow end up sandiwched between Bebe and Wendy at their table of giggling girls. I don't know what happened! I just walked in and immediately Bebe dragged me over here. But, honestly it's a pleasant change frm my usual group of mis-fits I eat with at lunch. Except for the questions

"How come you always wear baggy clothes?" Wendy asks, munching on celery. Only celery. "I bet you have a great figure. My skinny jeans probably fit you." She glances at me, expectantly. and I just gap at her.

Bebe squeals, "Oh, my god, Wendy, you are such a genius." She exclaims, holding her balled up fists to her chest. "You totally need to let us give you a makeover, Tweek." I shake my head. "C'mon! You don't even have to wear it to school. I just wanna do your hair SO bad!"

I grab my hair at the mention of it. "No way, man! you'd dress me like a girl- GAH- I can't handle that!" Bebe makes a face that makes me squeak, "I'm sorry!"

She nods and brushes her hair to the right side of her head, her curls fall accordingly, "Just let me paint your nails then."

I twitch and break, "Okay! You can paint my nails one day-GEH!"

Bebe grins, showing her perfect pearly white tweeth. Bebe's definitely the most attractive _girl _at our school. "So," She starts, "Tweek, do you have any crushes?"

I twitch again. I'm not sure sitting here was a good idea after all. I shake my head frantically but my face is turning red, so probably not very convincing. "C'mon!" Bebe slaps the table. "You're gay. You probably have a list of the top five best looking guys at this school. Spill!"

I shriek and cover my blushing face with my hands. "No way, man!"

She gasps, "So you do have one!" She turns to Wendy, who's rubbing my shoulder, comfortingly, really only succeeding in making me more tense. She stops. Maybe she can read minds.

Great, now Bebe knows I have a list Fuck. The blonde shakes me. "Tweek, you have to tell us! C'mon, girl, c'mon!" All the girls chime in with, 'yeah's and 'you gotta tell us now'.

I crack. I'm weak. I can't handle pressure by itself, let alone _peer _pressure. "Fine!" I say, sharply over them all, causing everyone at the table to hush to silence. "Kenny is one, Craig is two, Stan is three-" some agree in whispers. I continue, "And then Token at four, and Damien is five."

"He's like hot in a, 'my dad's Satan' type of way." Red says.

I shrug, "I guess." He's just got the best abs and dark hair is a turn on for me.

"Oh, my god, Tweek, you should be a visionary." Bebe informs me. I shrug but all the girls agree.

"How come Eric wasn't there?" Wendy asks. Everyone stares at her. Even me.

"Because he's a dick, I g-guess." I know he looks better than when we were younger but his asshole personality just makes him so unattractive to me.

Wendy shrugs, "Yeah, totally." Weird.

Bebe suddenly smirks, "So, Kenny's at the top... I see you two hanging out sometimes and I know he's bi-"

My jaw drops once I realize what she was imiplying. "God, NO, Bebe!" I say. "I don't like Kenny like that. Trust me." There's just those times we slept together but we were both drunk! And Kenny said I really wasn't into it. and fell asleep.

I don't really remember what happened after but I know he was fucking lying. I just think he didn't want me to feel bad about sleeping with him when I was drunk. Kenny's fucking dumb because Kenny is a hot piece of ass. Whatever, I appriciate him so.

Kenny's hot but a whore sadly.

Bebe shrugged, "You two would be so cute together." And then she drops it. "Are you gonna go shopping with me and Red after school?"

I raise an eyebrow, "Me?" She nods at me like I'm stupid. "Why would I?"

"Because!" Is her reply, as if that explains everything. She groans, "It's, like my only day off. Let me buy you one pair of jeans."

I have a mini battle in my head, choosing the pros and cons of going to the mall with Bebe after school today. Going would mean spending extra time not home, not sleeping, drawing, writing, smoking... making out with Kenny... ecetera. But going out means company, new jeans, potentially Harbucks, maybe food... Not being bored, ultimately.

I always go home after school and lately I haven't been able to draw or write anyway. So I shrug, "Fine, Bebe," Plus, Bebe wanting to waste one of her rare days off buying me a pair of jeans is actually kinda sucks. "I'll go to the mall with you and Red."

Bebe turns to her dark haired bestie. "What about you, Wendy? We're gonna try the new sushie place."

Wendy finisheds her greens and shake her head before looking at her friend. "Can't." She says, simply. "I have debate club."

Bebe nods like she knew the answer this whole time. "No problem. I'll see you this weekend."

"Yeah," Wendy responds quickly.

Everything about that was suspicious. How Bebe asked Wendy to go, how Wendy answered, and how Bebe acted about Wendy going to debate club. But, even though I've been sitting here all lunch, listening to all these girls gossip and giggle, I don't care enough to ask about it, plus I'm smart enough to not do that while Wendy;s right here- God, wait, do I actually wanna know?

"I saw your face when Ms. Stone paired you with Craig." Bebe changes the subject, while also lightening the mood. I stare at her, asking her to elaborate with my eyes and also praying whatever she thinks he saw was a wrong interpretation or that I can lie good enough to make her believe it was. "You looked terrified." I shrug. "Tweek, you looked like you might have a heart attack."

"I don't blame you. Craig's so scary!" Red says. Everyone nods.

"How he doesn't ever smile or anything." Anne almost asks but presents more as a statement. Red agrees anyways.

"He's really icy, right?" Nicole says to Anne, looking for confirmation. She understands because Nicole looks unsure that made anysense anyway. But I get it and Anne nods. " But his eyes are nice."

"I just wish I could admire them without being glared at, you know?" Bebe pops open her diet soda. "He always either looks dead or pissed." I find myself nodding and stop myself just because I'm embarrassed. "But, boy is he hot. And you can tell he works out when he's mad or something because of his build."

"He's in my gym class and one time he lifted his shirt to wipe sweat from his face. I literally died. Oh, my god." Red tells us. My head darts around the table as they exchange their 'Craig stories' Red says, "I think he's way nicer than he comes off as. He's just hella awkward and quiet so he doesn't know how to act around people."

"Why's that?" Anne asks.

Red shrugs, "Because one time he held the door and when I thanked him he said you're welcome and everything."

Wendy scoffs, "Wow, he has manners."

"It was surprising _to me _that he even had _those_!" Red explains.

"Well, I think he's a monster. He's always, like purposely mean to me." Wendy tells the table.

"I can see hwy you'd be scared, Tweek." Red repeats.

Feeling oddly closer to the girls I squeak out, "He's gonna kill me, man!" I grab my hair, troubled. Wendy's hand goes back on my shoulder, dismissing my previous mind reader theory. But it works better this time somehow. I take a deep breath.

Bebe's grinning so hugely right now, confusing me because why would my troubles please her unless she were plotting against me. Sweet Jesus! "Aw, Tweek! You're so cute when you freak out!" She squeals, relieving my worries about that. "But why woudl Craig kill you?"

"Because the teacher paired him with me and he hates me!" I quickly explain my reasoning.

Bebe nods, "Yeah, well..."

I scream, "I knew it!" She agrees! I'm totally gonna die!

"No, no, Tweek, Craig is not gonna kill you." Wendy assures me but when she doesn't give a why I start panicking again. Wendy's smart and she's lying about Craig not killing me. She;s not even doing a good job. This is how I die? I better revise my will.

"Seriously, Tweek, I was joking. " Bebe tells me, letting me worry just a little less. "Look, there he is." Bebe whispers, sharply. Everybody at the table turns their attention to the tall noirette exiting the lunch line with Clyde and Token, falling behind slightly. His eyes almost immediately shoot to us. We all qucikly turn away but I scream and jump before I do.

Oh no! He's plotting. He has to know by now right? I chew my lower lip, nervously.

"Don't worry, Tweek. He'll probably make you do the project alone anyways."

Oh, my god. She's right! Wendy's right. There, she _is _smart. Hell yeah, it'll be scary when he asks but then it'll be over.

Haing this thought all day killed my nerves significantly by seventh period. SO imagine my surprise when someone tapped my hsoulder at my locker.

I had thought it was Kenny so I was completely calm going trough my biology notebook, trying to decide whether I'd take it home and study or not knowing good and damn well I wouldn't be doing any fucking studying if I did or didn't.. "Today I sat with Bebe and the girls at lunch." I tell him. "Girls are so fucking weird, man." I laugh, "No wonder I'm so gay." I laugh harder, turning to him. "Right, Ken?

I scream at the top of my lungs. and cover my mouth with my hand.

Craig just blinks at me. "Shit, dude." I swear, catching my breath. The nerves are back.

"Sorry." The noirette says to me. I pause. An apology? Is this how Red felt when he held the door?

"What's up?" I ask, cutting to the chase. Ask me to do the project and then leave before I can even answer.

"I was wondering if-" Here it is. Thank Christ, I can stop worrying about it now. "You wanted to start at your house or my house."

I stop again. What. What? What! "Uhm..."

I must look as confused as I feel becuse his next words are, "The project in Geometry." I blink at him. "We were paired together." I nod. "I usually procrastinate so I wanna finish it as early as possible." And I nod again. "Are you slow? His question brings me out of my daze. Hvae I been stairing at him? I stare more. "Answer my fucking question!"

"My house." If we go to his house and end up alone who knows what'd happen!

He nods, "Let's go."

"But I have plans. today!" Shit that was for my head!

Craig turns back to look at me. "Then cancel." Now I'm conflicted. I can't tell if he's nice or not. Some things suggest he is and then he snaps at me! We walk through majorly empty halls, downstairs, and to Craig's car- or mom's car. Maybe family's car. I don't know. It's a blue Ford car with a spacious backseat.

Inside smells like cigarettes and mango car freshener, which hangs loosly around the review mirror, Craig adjusts it before starting the car and pulling his seatbelt across his chest. He had tossed both of our bags in the back and started oull ing out o the parking soace.

There was a gum car cup in one of the cup holder and sunglasses in the otherone. Head phones are drapped over everything and the floor is littered with balled up tissures, random papers, and plastic bags.

Craig's pupils are tiny and they don't seem to change no matter what lighting we're in, considering mine are usually occupying the majority of my irises at all times. It makes him look scarier than his eyes should. Because they're a very lovely shade of blue. Like almost grey. He catches me staring so I avert my gaze out the window.

The ride is completely silent and I zone out so I don't notice when we park in front of my house until he opens my door and I almost fall out. "We're here."

His vocie is just as blank as his face. He intrigues me now and that's just no good. I rush up our stone walkway and knock on our front door twice. There's silence. Fuck.

I rummage through my bag, desperately trying to get out of the harsh December air. I find my keys, shove them in the door, and unlock it. I push the door open and let Craig in.

Why aren't my parents here?

Craig takes care of shutting the door so I begin to search the house. "Mom!" I call up the stairs after checking the office, bathroom, dining room, and kitchen.

"Dear, Tweek, we had to drive to Denver for a lounge chair for the living room. The one we have is too lumpy for your father. We forgot to tell you we were leaving. Well be back next week." I come back into the kitchen to find Craig reading a note on the fridge I missed.

I stand next to him and reread it. "Oh, my god!" I slap my forehead with my hand and mumble, "I hate it when they do this."

"They do this often?" Craig asks, curiously and I notice him almost examining my house. First, taking an overall view and then looking closer at all of our little knick knack things, which are pretty weird and random. My parent's are... moony. But, if you ask them it usually makes sense. At the time, at least. "Leave you alone for a week, unexpectantly."

I nod, even though he's too busy inspecting a small asian cat sculpture to see me. So I also say, "Yeah,"

"That must be nice."

"Not really. I'm a paranoid person in general so being alone like this makes it hard for me to feel secure. It sucks." I tell him. "And they'll come back with a lamp. They never actually get a new chair. "

I have to text Bebe. I pull out my phone.. Craig says, "That's odd."

"My family's odd." I tell him simply. He just nods. "You skipped class." I say. I want him to tell me why. I don't know why I didn't just ask why he wasn't. Whatever, too late now.

He shrugs, "So?"

"Uhm." I sit on the couch and work at unlacing my boots. "I just thought you didn't know abou the project or something- I was surprised when you came up to me. Actually it was kind of rude." I'm babbling. Shut up.

Craig looks ar me, setting down my parents weeding picture. They're sitting and my mom had me in her lap, holding me up so she can kiss my cheek, my dad kissing my other one. I like that picture, a lot. "Kenny told me." He tells me. I nodm understandingly. "He said you were scared of me."

"GEH!" I jump, trying to casually move out of the kitchen, away from the knives.

Craig follows me in a 'not-caring' way. I don't believe there's much he does care about. "He was right." He notes.

"No!" I interject. "I'm not scared of you! You're just intimidating." I say, unconciously tidying up the living rooom, picking up papers off the coffee table, sorting through them. When he doesn't speak I feel the need to further explain. "You never smie."

He scoffs, "You don't smile often either though." He points out. I blush because if he's been watching me... What the fuck! Why has he been watching me?! Jesus!

"Yeah," I say, "But that's different."

"How." He immediately shoots back, watching me form the kitchen door frame.

I shrug, "Because you never really look any emotion in general and I have a lot."

"Mostly you just scream."

Okay, well! "So what?! At least it's something! People can understand me being scared becayse they know what being scared is like but you just don't react to anything so they think you're not, like, human."

"Harsh." He walks over to the entertainment center and goes through our movies. He's kinda nosy, huh?

"Well," I don't have anything to say but it's quiet.

"And you believe them, think I'm an alien, and that's why you're scard of me?" After hearing how stupid it sounds make me a little relunctant to nod but I do.

"I'm just paranoid, don't take it personally."

"Sure." He says in a completely not sarcastic way. I don't understand him. Does anybody? I doubt it.

I start up the stairs, hoping he'll notice and follow. Though, I ffeel like there is a chance he'd see me and not give a fuck. But after throwing myself on my bed he enters my sanctuary.

I feel like my room looks nothing like it should. I flick my LED light on and it reflects off the paint on my cieling. I drew dinosairs with bright neon green and blue paint. My walls are very light pastel shade of green. On them are band posters, sketches, glow in the dark sars, dream carchers, and my LED luight. My floor is wood but almost completely covered with a huge fuzzy throw rug, stained multiple places with a substance that's so obviously cofee. i have a bookshelf holding my sketch books, books, photo albums, art supplys, and old journals. My desk rests next to that, cluttered with more art stuff and writing stuff and stuff that I don't even know what it is.

I realize Craig's bent over in my closet. I jump up. "What are you doing?!"

He starts to snicker. Oh no... He comes up holding a shoe box. Oh no... He opens it, revealing my pipe, my weed, and also my condoms and lube. "Dude, why are you snooping through all my stuff?"

"How I get to know people." He tells me. I realize Craig looks amused and it's the first expression I've ever seen him make other than something mad. "So far you were looking pretty lame but your room is really cool looking. And this," He holds the box up. "Just gave you bonus points."

I nod, not really caring anymore. "Bring that to me." I tell him, gesturing to the box. He obeys, surprisingly and sits next to me on my bed. I pull out my pipe and crush enough weed to fill the entire bowl. I grab my lighter and place my mouth on the end. I light the bowl and inhale deeply. Once I'm done wiht my hit I ghost the smoke in my mouth before releasing what's in my lungs.

I hand my pipe to Craig who doesn't argue. He takes a hit and starts coughing like crazy hwne he finighses he takes another hit and hands me back my pipe. We go back and forth until I've refilled the bowl four or five times and then I place everything back in the box and slide it under my bed.

"Another thing I do to get to know someone is the secrets game."

"What's that?" I stare at my cieling and pretend the dinosaurs are still alive and stomping around.

"I tell you a secret and you tell me one." He explains.

"What?" He repeats himself and I nod, "Okay, let's play."

"I don't listen to rock and screamo music." he says. "I listen to mostly rap."

"I'm gay."

He chuckles, "That's not a secret. You and Kenny fuck."

I gap at him, "How did you know that?" I meant the sleeping with Kenny. I probably knew he knew I was gay.

"Pfft, if I'm just really observant, everyone's an idiot." I blink at him. He shrugs. "I couldn't make it make sense outside my head." I nod. "And besides, you're out."

"I know." I say. "I just wanted to start easy."

"Fine." He accepts it. "I lost my virginity to Bebe." He says. "It was terrible because I was completely shit-faced and had her explain everything and how to do it." I snicker imagining a focused, younger Craig with a naked Bebe, explaining to him how to put his dick in her pussy.

After I finish my laughing fit, I manage a, "I'm not a virgin." While laughing.

Craig groans, "Yeah, I know! You and Kenny fuck."

"Oh yeah... Seriously, how'd you figure that out? Most people think I'm forever alone because I look like a twelve year old."

"You don't look like a twelve year old.." He tells me with no indication of what that's supposed to mean except for when he adds, "You're just, like a baby type of cute." He says. "When you were smoking I just kept thinking how you look like a baby with a cigar. It shouldn't work but it does." He tells me, laughing. "That was so smart."

I think Craig laughing is the most beautiful thing I've ever experienced.

Did he, low key, just call me cute. "...I guess."

"I don't know how I found out. I just thought everyone knew."

"I don't like him." I say. Craig looks at me like that was a sufficient secret and I'm surprised he thought I did. Like Kenny, I mean.

"Now, this is news."

"We just fuck around because we both get horny. I don't know."

Craig nods, sitting back. "I don't get horny." He says and then adds, "That's my secret."

I look at him, skeptically. "Fucking liar."

"I'm serious." He says. "I only slept with Bebe to get it over with."

"That sounds terrible."

"Kinda was." He admits. "But, Bebe's a good sport." He smiles. it's true. Bebe's super smart, nice, and pretty. I realize the nature of our conversation and my face heats up. "Your turn." He points out.

"We were supposed to be doing work."

"And then your parents ended up not being here. And then we got high."

I squint. "Really?"

He nods, "Yeah."

"So, you don't ever get turned on?" My question is out of the blue and innocent. Or at least, I tried to make it be.

But Craig turns his body to face me completely and says, "What's that tone?" I just blink at him, confused. "Like, why are you asking?"

I shrug, "I was _just _asking." I defend.

He narrows his now darker blue eyes. "It was like you were gonna gonna suggest something."

He fucked up. "What would I suggest, Craig?"

His cheeks are tinted pink ever so slightly. He laughs. "Smart ass. You think you can turn me on?"

"Do you wanna be turned on?" I counter.

He smirks, "Why not?" Because you don't really know me and who knows if I have any STD's but I mean I didn't say we'd fuck. I'm just trying to give him a boner or something.

Yeah, because that sounds right.

"You want me to do it now?" I ask.

_What the literal fuck._

"You're sounding pretty confident that you can do this."

I shrug, "I'm intoxicated." He nods like it makes sense. "You want me to do it now?" I repeat like it was my first time asking and I only just realize he ignored my question the first time.

"Why not? You're parents aren't home." Not that it'd matter if they were. But, it makes it easier to get in the mood. Sometimes forgetful, absent-minded parents are awesome!

"So should I just kiss you?"

He laughs, "I don't know. I thought you could do it by yourself. What happen? Did you lose your nerve?"

I shrug, "Man, shut the fuck up." I roll over to him and after some breif hesitation I mount him.

Oh, my god, I know! I mount him. I toss my leg over his abdominal and straddle it. I don't wanna kiss him first. If he's not sensitive I'll have to go slow. So I say, "Take off your shirt."

He sits up a little and pulls it over is head. He lays back down. He has this face. I've never seen Craig make this face- I've never actually seen him make any faces before today. But how is this face so attractive on him? It could just be his faint abs and, Christ, his V lines.

But his face. His eyebrows are so dark and so attractive and the way they're lowered. His eyes are narrowed and dark. His lips are twisted in a smirk and so pink and kissable. That's a word. I know it's in the dictionary somewhere.

I survey the situation under me. A shirtless, smirking Craig, who claims to not being able to, 'get it up' and I'm supposed to do something about it.

Great.

His eyes are fixed on mine but mine are locked on his stomach. I run my hands lightly over his stomach and chest, just to see if I'd get a reaction. And then my hands slide up his sides. They go to his face, tracing his jaw and back to his stomach, feeling his ab's a little rougher this time than before, my thumb brushing across his V line while my other hand glides down his- _mmmm _\- happy trail.. And I realize how this has become more for me than him because he's just watching my awed face as I take in his body. Whatever, I memory lock all my information anyways. The information I'm gaining about his body.

My head dips and I start somewhere easy, somewhere obvious, his ear. I draw my tongue down the side and nibble on his ear lobe. Though, he doesn't make any noises or signs that this bubbled something inside him, his hands go to my hips, slowly climbing up, inside the back of my shirt.

My lips dance across his jaw but drop into the crook of his neck. I just lightly suck and bite his skin, moving into his shoudler area. I just barely brush my tongue against him, inside my mouth, gradually soaking more of his skin with my saliva. And if that's not attractive, I don't know what is. Then traveling lower to his chest, I stop to suck on his collar bone a little bit.

He lets out a sigh that stirs something in my stomach and also confuses the hell out of me. Was it a good sigh? Did do something right? Or is he just getting tired or something?

His skin is soft and slippery under my mouth. my tongue brushes against his nipple and then I take it in my mouth, sucking lightly. My eyes on his the whole time, watching for any reaction.

His eyes close and his lips turn upward. "It feels nice." He informs me. No shit. I hope it feels nice. I abandon his torso, after deciding I hadn't kissed him enough and then, sadly realizing... I HADN'T KISSED HIM AT ALL. A vulnerable, high, and probably just fucked up Craig Tucker in my house, in my bed, wearing no shirt, begging me- _asking me _to 'try' to give him a boner and I haven't fucking kissed him yet?! TWEEK WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK, 'HIGH-TWEEK'?! GET IT TOGETHER! GEH!

So, obviously I'm gonna kiss him.

I move my body up his so my face is right in fron of his. But, boy is the the view different up here. Should I kiss him? Was that part of the deal? Is a narwhal a real animal? What does it look like? Where the fuck would I aquire a narwhal?

I start to laugh.

I start to laugh. My eyes close and my face falls into Craig's shoulder. I drop my weight on him. I can feel Craig's body moving under me. He's laughing too. I laugh harder. "Why are you laughing?" I ask him.

"Why are _you _laughing?" He asks me.

Snorting I respond, "I don't remember."

So slowly, I pull my head from his neck and I plant a nice soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. It's like a head's up about what's gonna happen. Now is, like his chance to tell me no. But he doesn't move. I knew he wouldn't. My next kiss is only half his mouth and if you think that makes kissing his entire mouth less scary, then fucking kill yourself for being so naive. But after a beat of my mouth hovering over his and our breaths syncing, us just breathing the same air, I press my lips against his.

And then I pull back and stare at him. He smiles. "Yeah?"

"I just-" I stop.

He nods, "Yeah."

"Cool." I guess. Isn't it cool? It is cool? What's cool? Anartica is probably cool? Penguins live there, I hear. And there's no polar bears in the south right? North? South? Pole...?

Somehow our gentle and so heavy make out turns, just... chaotic. No, fucking _hot_. Oh, my god. How am I not getting a boner from this? Oh wait, I totally fucking am. I attack more of Craig's face. Sloppy, open-mouthed kisses, wide and wet. I will occasionally bite his lower lip and even his cheek.

I can't catch my breath. It's all over the place. My skin is literally on fire. But, Craig, is so warm and his breathing is so soothing. And he's so hot, but not hot. How is he not hot? I need to find something that will work. He has to have a fettish or something. Like biting or pain or some type of foreplay.

My attack to his face gradually comes to an end. I sit back to look at him. His eyes opening with my movement. He raises his eye brows. "Yeah?"

I shrug, "Nothing?"

He shrugs, "Felt nice."

I sigh, rolling my eyes and also off of him. "Are you hungry?" I sit on the edge of my bed and feel him sit up behind me. He doesn't answer, instead just hops off the bed and exits the room.

I stalk after him. We go back downstairs and check the kitchen. "I think I've decided," He starts, raiding through my fridge, "I'm staying the night."

My cheeks blush, but only a little bit. "Why? And who the hell said you could stay?"

"You said you didn't like to be alone when your parents leave so I'll stay and offer that, 'security'." I guess if someone broke in Craig could kick some serious ass. But, that's only if they didn't bring a gun and of course a robber is gonna bring a gun. Then, in that case Craig would just get shot and his only purpose for staying would have been to get shot because, I mean, we should have known that a robber would have a gun when we made the agreement and that would mean that I killed Craig basically. And I couldn't handle having that against me, man! "No one is gonna break in, so that's just stupid." Craig tells me. I scream. "God damn it! What?!" He covers his ear with his free hand.

"You fucking read my mind, man! What the fuck! Agh!"

"Isn't weed supposed to calm you down or some shit?! Oh, my god. Shut the fuck up!" He puts the food down and covers my mouth. "You said it out loud." He says. "You gave some elaborate ass speech about how if I'm staying for security but a robber has a gun then I'm just here to get shot but _no one is gonna break in anyway_, so that's just stupid!" He repeats.

I nod, face flush under his big man hands. I wish I had man hands. My hands are tiny. And who knew I talked my thoughts when I'm high? Maybe Kenny knows and just never told me. That would explain why he was always more psychic when we smoked. I just already knew Kenny could read minds so it never really bothered me when he'd start talking about stuff I was thinking of.

His hands are off of my face and back into making a sandwich. Watching Craig Tucker make a sandwich is probably the most trippiest thing I've seen while high. This could all just not be real.

And I keep having these moments where I teleport to a different point in time. Like this morning or when we were making out. Whoa, Craig and I made out? We did. We totally did. I remember.

I forgot.

"Make me a sandwich too." How did I know to say that? Oh boy, we shouldn't have smoked that weed? When am I not high? Not only on specefically weed. I'm into a lot of shit. I bet Craig doesn't know that.

Is he making me a sandwich?

Sweet.

Should I tell him? About the drugs? No, that's not 'high' Tweek's decision to make. Leave it to mostly sober Tweek. He'll know what to do. That guys kinda mad though. Like, bonkers, maybe, even.

"I do a lot of drugs." I say, wondering if he'll understand I'm playing the secrets game still.

Bro, what the fuck? You just said we weren't doing that?

Really? When?

He looks at me, blinks, and then says, "I believe it."

"It's 'the secret game', C. Go."

He nods, like it's no big deal. It isn't but it's just weird how he manages to make everything small and insignificant. "I take pictures."

"Huh?"

"Like, photography." He explains. "I take pictures and I make videos."

"What are the videos." Sex tapes?

"No, not sex tapes, you fucking freak." Not nice. And I must've said that out loud too. "It's just videos of nature or music videos for songs I like, and my guinea pig. It's weird. I just like making things that look cool." He groans. "I'd have to be sober to make this sound right. I'm sorry."

Another apology. Cool. I should see how many I can get and then report back to the girls' table at lunch tomorrow. I'll tell them about the make out, the weed, and how he even stayed the night. _Oooh_.

"You can't stay." I say, after reminding myself of his previous notation. He goes back to staring at me. "It's a week day and it'd be weird; us here, alone. I don't know."

"Okay, well, when this weed wears off I'll go home."

How do I know exactly what he means? When the weed 'wears off' both of us are gonna be very close to passing the fuck out, which ultimately will end with Craig sleeping in my house. A few hours later I'll wake up and it will be too late for him to go home anyway. I try to glare but my eyes are hard to keep open. "Fine, stay, whatever. I don't care."

"Here." He holds one of two sandwiches out to me. I take it, gratefully. We eat them in no time, consider the munchies are present. We eat the chips in the cupboard, some macaroni and cheese, and then some leftover pie.

The last thing I remember is sitting on the couch, listening to Craig ramble about how he doesn't believe in God, but he believes in the universe. It's the longest I've ever heard his voice. He wouldn't stop talking and it lulled me to sleep.

* * *

_New story and stuff. The summary sucks, but don't fret, I plan to fix it soon I just wanted to get this our asap. Idk but leave a review and tell me whatcha think. The chapters in this story are planned to be way longer than any of my others so yay ig._


	2. Impossible

This morning I woke up with something warm and moist pressed against my cheek. That sounds disgusting but it was Craig's chest. He sweats in his sleep or it's just hot in my house. Maybe it happens when he passes out from weed.

Who cares? My back is fucking killing! How did we fall asleep on the couch? I'm so... tired? Usually I'm not tired when I wake up. Usually I don't sleep (Except when I use drugs, that is. Then I might sleep for six whole hours). Maybe it's because I was on the couch but then, I feel like that should have made me more awake.

I stare at Craig. We really made out yesterday, man. When he sleeps his brows are furrowed, like he's perplexed. Still troubled, even in his sleep. I blow up and the hair hanging over his forehead flies about. I smile.

I sit up and poke his cheek until he stirs. His eyes open like he wasn't sleeping. "I wasn't sleeping." He confirms, in a not-believable way. "I was... resting my eyes." He looks around. "what time is it?"

After consulting the clock on the DVR I say, "Two in the morning, C."

He groans, "How'd we fell asleep on the couch?" I shrug. "I'm all gross." I shrug again. "Let's go to your bed. Fuck, I'm sore."

We get up and waddle up the stairs and into my room. I stopped at the thermastat to turn on the AC for Craig. I turn off the lights and we cuddle together on the bed. Well, I cuddle Craig, assuming even if he weren't okay with it, he'd tolerate it because we're both still slightly fucked up. And then I'm back to sleep.

* * *

The second time I wake up Craig's staring at his phone next to me. I watch him until he notices. His eyes are so light and weird and... we made out yesterday. Is it okay to talk about or does he wanna pretend it never happened? How high were we when we did? Were we even high at that point? God, I don't remember.

"Clyde and Token are throwing a party." He says. "I owe Clyde and I have to go. Come with me."

I make a face. "I don't like parties."

"Yeah, me neither." He says. "I don't like being drunk but if I have to go I'm gonna get wasted."

"How'd you wake up before me? What time is it?" Are we late for school? I'm totally okay with that.

He shrugs, "I have a mental alarm clock. I always wake up at the same time every day no matter what." Creepy. "I was planning on pulling up to the school scene a little late today."

"Cool." I reclose my eyes.

"I thought someone like you wouldn't sleep much."

_Someone like you_, "I don't." I admit. "But, I kinda do. It's weird. Don't question it."

He nods, "Sure." Asshole.

My eyes open again after deciding, maybe, I can't go back to sleep and maybe I never will either. Fuck. "Are you..." I glance at the dark haired boy, "hungry?"

Craig's nose bunches up, "God, no," He says. "We must've pigged out last night or something because my stomach and my head hurt so fucking bad." He groans into his forearm.

"You want a pain killer?" I suggest.

Craig stops moaning and removes the limb from his face. "Yes." He decides and we sit up. We stroll down the hall to the bathroom and I open the mirror cabinet. Craig's lips part, slighly, "Whoa," He pulls out a bottle, among many and reads the label. "D-Doxe-" He raises an eyeborw at me.

"Doxepine." I say. "Sleeping pills." He looks back at the bottle. He pops it open and drops a few in his pocket before placing it back on the shelf. I note this.

"Do you take all of these? What are they for?"

"GEH!" Why the hell is he asking so many fucking questions, man? None of his fucking business. I thought this kid cared about nothing! "LIARS!"

Craig blinks at me for a moment and I blush. "N-Nothing!" I assure him. "They're just pills to- _gah_\- make me... not so- _geh_\- crazy." I say, pulling out the pain relievers. "Anti-anxiety, ADHD, paranoia, and anti-depressants. I don't take them all. Not regularly." But occassionally, all at once so I can get a certain type of high.

I don't know if Craig understood that I meant I use these drugs to get high typically, but if he does he doesn't show it. "You get depressed?" He asks.

I shrug, "I don't think I feel anything anymore." It's sad but it's the truest thing I've ever said before in my life.

"Then I want some of these." He dumps some of the blue pills into his hand and then shoves them into his pocket too. I don't care why Craig wants my drugs, if I can sleep with him.

...

"GAH!" I cover my face with my hands. What is wrong with me?! Oh, my god. "No!" I didn't mean that like that. I just... We made out so... Craig's sexy as fuck, okay?! My gay heart can't handle it...

"Are you okay?"

I nod, releasing my face. "I'm just- my thoughts." Yeah, that's a sentence that made sense. Well, at least Craig nods like it does. He doesn't care. "What are we g-gonna do?" I ask him. My question seems to confuse him so I try to clarify. "If we aren't gonna head to school yet."

Even though his expression doesn't change a smidge I can tell he has an, '_oh_' moment. His eyes pierce mine and I have to look away. That is, until he says, "We can do whatever you want, Cuddles."

My heart flutters. "'_Cuddles_'?!" My eye twitches and my face heats up. "Why?!" Is all I can manage.

Craig's lips pull up at the ends so lightly they almost don't. "You were all over me last night."

Oh no. I cover my face with my hands. "I am so sorry. I g-get like that when I'm high. I'm sorry."

"Horny?" He asks.

I yelp at his bluntness and try to cover more of my face. "N-No! Just... I get... t-touchy... I d-don't know. Why do you have to say it like that! Jesus Christ, man! GAH!"

"So you do?" I scream and grab my hair. He just responds with a very threatening, "Interesting."

Why?! Why is that interesting?!

After gravitating to the couch to try to sober up Craig asks, "So you really don't have a bone for McCormick?" I groan. Did I tell him that? Oviously I told him I didn't but still I can't believe we even talked about that.

"Clearly I do, if I'm sleeping with him. I just don't like him like _that_."

"Why not?" When did Craig get so talkative? Or is this also part of his initiation for friends? Go through their shit, get high with them, talk about secrets, be annoying as hell...

I shrug, "Kenny's hot but he's kind of an insensitive asshole. He's absolutely heartless. I think he's actually incapable of harbouring any type of feelings for anyone at all." I say. "Except maybe Clyde, because he fucking hates him."

"Man, that sucks." Craig says.

"How come?"

"Butter's has a huge fag crush on that asshole." Craig explains in a way where he looks like he really doesn't care. I peg him as a person who doesn't (I assume he doesn't care about much at all actually) so it's bizzarre to me that he even says this. How does he even know this information?

"Oh." I nod. "That does suck." If Kenny finds out that Butters has a crush on him, which he will, then he's gonna sleep with him and then he'll try to move on, meanwhile Butters ass will think one day they're gonna get married because Kenny just stole his V-card.

"Could you do me a favor?" Craig looks at me, interested by my question I guess. Interested could be fabricating it a little. "Don't tell Kenny that." Craig pulls out a pack of gum from his pants that I had no idea he had. He pops a piece into his mouth He stares at me while he chews. "And try to make sure Butters doesn't think he has a chance with Kenny." His eyes don't move. He doesn't even blink and although he says nothing, I hear his eyes ask _why? _"Because I don't want Butters to sleep with Kenny."

"You sleep with Kenny." He points out, vexatiously.

"Yeah, but that's only because he's great in bed and we both understand our relationship is always friends no matter what we might do in the bedroom-" I blush. What am I saying?! "Gah! It's different!" Craig chews and I can hear him calling me a hypocrite. "God damn it, Butters is a virgin and Kenny only wants to sleep with people!"

"Wait." Craig interrupts, though I didn't have else to say. "You're okay with sleeping with him but not being in a relationship?"

"Being 'friends' with Kenny is basically like being his boyfriend. You just know that he has a lot of other boyfriends and girlfriends. He takes you out randomly, you make out randomly and most of the time you end up having sex, and he calls to make sure you're doing okay- gah!"

Craig nods, "That sounds wrong." I know it does. "You know it does. Why would you do that? Just find a faggy boyfriend or something." Fucking mind reader or some shit. Maybe even Kenny level. Maybe even higher. Fuck.

I laugh, "You know there are only like four out gay kids in South Park. One is Butters, one is Thomas, one is one of those crazy fucking goths, and then the last is me. And just because Thomas and I both scream a lot doesn't mean I like him. He's an asshole too."

"But you guys could relate. Did you even try?" Craig raises an eyebrow. Sarcastic bastard.

"Yeah, Craig, I actually did try. He said he hated me, which was fine because his stupid outbursts always scared the shit out of me. And, overall he was an asshole, just like you, which I guess was to be expected considering how much you worshipped his balls in middle school."

"No, dude, _he _wanted _my _nuts!" Craig says, excitedly, looking like he was remanencing.

"No shit."

"Seriously, man," He says and then after he settles he also says, "He blew me a few times."

I gap at him. "No he fucking didn't. Are you joking?"

"Absolutely not."

"Thomas sucked your dick?!" I exclaim. Craig nods. "And you're fucking okay with that? He's a guy!"

He makes a face, "Aren't you gay?"

"Yeah, but_ aren't you not_?"

He shrugs, "I told you I don't get turned on so it's whatever if he wants to suck my dick."

"what happened after that?"

Craig shrugs and it irritates me more than mildly just because it's something my parents always do. Start a story that seems to have a point, come to find out it doesn't and they don't even remember the rest. AGH. "Something like he got mad that I wouldn't suck him off or that I didn't care for a relationship, I was just okay with him sucking my dick. Maybe both." Quickly after he explains he says, "Were you serious about 'taking a lot of drugs' thing last night?" I SAID THAT?! OH, MY GOD, WHAT THE FUCK! No,no,no,no,no,no,no. NO NO NO NO NO.

"Don't change the subject, queermo."

"Are they the drugs in your cabinet- You use those to get high or something?" Well, Craig is smart. And seems to have good memory even when he's high.

I jump to my feet. "We should really head out. How late are you planning on us being and we also haven't started our project, FYI."

When I look back to Craig, still on the couch, he's looking at me so blankly but it just reads, _what the fuck are you hiding?_ I don't wanna talk about what I'm hiding. I don't know you! I grab my hair, troubled. "I... I c-can't. I can't. We can't talk about this, man! I don't want to. I refuse to. Just... Just respect my boundaries, or something- _Gah_!"

My eyes flcik back over to Craig to see his reaction. He's standing. "Where do you wanna go? Let's skip school completely."

"Skip school? Okay." Why is that okay? I mean, I do it, especially when my parents are gone. But, with Craig? Why? Doesn't seem like something that'd be appealing to me. '_Okay_' I said. Like anything's _okay_.

We start to grab our gear- jackets, boots, his hat, and my scarf and then we head out to his car, sprinting through the cold. And as soon as we're both in he turns the keys in the ignition and cranks the heat.

I scream when cold air blast me in the face and cover it with my scarf. Craig kind of snickers. "You did that on purpose, asshole."

"Where do you wanna go?" Oh yeah, I forgot he even asked me that.

The air starts to warm and I unravel my scarf. "I have to go to North Park."

Craig pulls out of my drive way, "What's in North Park?"

"Weed."

Craig nods, "Why don't you just buy from Kenny?"

I haven't actually told anybody this because Kenny is one of my closest friends but Craig already knows too much for me to not keep him. "Kenny's the only dealer in our high school. He doesn't always have inventory, and, honestly his shit isn't the highest quality. It's not low but North Park has better, I've come to understand." It's pretty ghetto in North Park, whereas South Park is full of white rednecks. So over there they have a lot more dealers. More options... I don't know. But I get higher and that's always good.

I pull out my phone and start to turn it off. "Why're you doing that?" He asks me, glancing from the corner of his eye.

"Save battery. I'm always scared my phone will die and then I'll really need it. Like car breaks down out in the middle of no where or something."

"Paranoid."

"GAH!" I twitch and then reply with, "Stupid."

Craig hasn't said anything about us making out. But, he did say he used to let Thomas suck his dick so I don't know if that's just something he regularly does because he says he doesn't get turned on. Maybe he just likes the feeling.

God, why am I so caught up about that shit? I guess because I was high and so it's like a dream. I can't believe it actually happened. I would like to talk about it but, there's that thing where I don't know how he feels about it and since he also hasn't brought it up on his own, I don't know if I should. If I do how'd I say it?

I mean, if it's gonna be bothering me like this I might as well. "Hey, C," Craig hums an acknowledgement. I continue, "So last night we kind of, well, I just- you know, we-" Dammit. I was so close. I hate my voice. I hate the way I talk and how I sound so nervous and weak. How unattractive. Why can't I just do stuff? Like a normal person. Craig doesn't give a fuck about anything. Why can't I be like that? I bet Craig thinks I'm a freaking retard. "We kissed."

Oh shit. I said it. Oh shit.

I know he remembers. He must remember. He remembered everything else, why wouldn't he remember about this too? But then why didn't he bring it up like everything else? Why can't I get him?! "Yeah," He says, his face lighting up. Not in a normal person way. His eyebrows just lifted a little. "You're a good kisser but I didn't get a boner. You can try again later."

Is that what he does? Becomes friends with gay guys and then lets them sexually please him? For what? I'm not sucking his dick. "What's wrong? You don't want to? Fine."

My brows knit together, agrivated. "What is that?"

"What's what?"

I sigh, frustratedly, "You getting blow jobs from Thomas and now wanting me to make out with you and shit."

Craig kind of chuckles, "Whoa, Tweek, calm down." He says, with a smile. "What's got your panties in a bunch, huh?" He asks. "Are you jealous that Thomas got to see my dick?" He says in a voice as if he were talking to a baby.

Fucking asshole looked cute as hell too.

Goddammit! "No!" I deny, sounding pretty unconvincing just because I don't think I can convince anyone of anything. "God, no! Just-Just who says I wanna keep kissing you? I was high, dude. That shit just happens when I'm high."

"Well, then, you can try again next time we're high together. And we're going to that party tonight so that can't be too far off."

I take in a deep breath. This guy's impossible.

Twenty minutes later and I'm sound asleep. Music from the radio is playing on low volume and he wasn't lying about the rap. But it's tasteful, at least, I guess.

Knowing something about him, not everybody knows is a weird feeling. But it doesn't feel as good as it could. I'm sure plenty of people who know him know about this little fragment of informatiion.

The car was finally a comfortable tempeture to where Craig wasn't hot and I wasn't cold and I feel something wet run up the side of my ear. Since I wasn't dead sleep and not really sleeping at all, more of a meditating thing I taught myself as a substitue for sleep, my eyes open immediately.

We're at Harbuck's.

Craig winks at me. He's right next to my face. His breath hits my cheek. I can't even turn to him because he's right there. I blink at him, proud of myself for not screaming. "We're here and I thought you might need to 're-charge'. Also, I'm hungry."

"Did you just lick my ear?

He stares at me. "What do you want? I'm paying."

I touch my ear. "You licked my ear."

"I think I'm gonna get a latte or some shit with caramel. Man, coffee sucks."

I perk up. "What the fuck, man?! Coffee is amazing!"

"Not anything I've had." He mumbles. Before I can argue he says, "We're up. What do you want?"

"An Americano with double shot expresso."

The Harbuck's employee greets us over the intercom and Craig orders my drink, his drink, and then a croissant, turning to me afterwards. "Damn, kid, how do you sleep?"

"I don't." I say, simply.

"Oh, yeah, that's right."

We pull up to the window where Craig pays and then we're handed our drinks and croissant. He only ordered one. He will have to share. When he pulls the croissant out I express this by making a whining noise and opening my mouth when he glances at me.

He quickly shoves the bread into my face and then pulls back when my teeth are sunk into it. I hum thankfully. He just says, "Sure." And I sip on my coffee, pleasantly satisfied. "You gotta tell me where this place is." I nod.

And for the next fifteen minutes I'm Craig's GPS. I was so worried about giving him the wrong direction that I fucked up and missed a turn. We got lost. Craig called me a faggot. It was cool. And finally we showed up at an apartment complex.

The people I usually get my weed from in North Park are safisticated. Their weed is classy and even their neighborhood. That's good because I'm already paranoid and I'm a skinny little kid and I could get jumped out here.

I tell Craig to wait in the car and I'll be back in a few minutes. I already texted my dealer that I was coming so I head up to the second floor and find their door. I knock a few times and wait. My dealer is gay too and sometimes I sleep with him for drugs. But that's only because he's so sexy not only for the drugs. I'm not a whore. He's just like another 'friend with benefits' that Craig's seems to have such a problem with.

The door swings open and Micheal is standing there wearing shades, a tank top, and some gym shorts. "Hello," he smiles, "how are you?"

I nod, "Fine." He lets me in and heads back into a room and soon emerging with two dubs. I hand him two twenty and he kisses my cheek. I blush. "Thanks."

"No problem. What's up?" I shrug. I should really get going. Craig is waiting for me. "How'd you get here?"

"A friend drove me."

"Oh," He says, "McCormick?"

"No," I say, shaking my head. "A different guy."

"_Oh_," He says in a suggestive tone, "I see. Another suiter?"

"He's not gay."

"You converted him? Hot damn, Tweek, I knew you had it in you."

I blush. "I didn't! He's just a friend." I try to assure him but his eyes penetrate my soul. "We didn't sleep together!" I sputter.

Micheal smirks, "But you did other things?"

How am I so bad at this?! "No! We didn't do _anything _sexual."

"So what _did _you do?" He asks.

"Ugh!" I groan. "we kissed. That's it!"

"Okay, cool it, man. Are you courting him? I feel like you have a gay crush on him-"

"I don't!"

"-And you guys have already kissed. He's clearly convertable."

"He's not a car, he's asexual!"

"I hope things go well."

I scream. "I have to go! He's still- _gah_\- waiting!" I rush out of his house and down the stairs, nearly jogging.

I get in the car and slam the door shut behind me. Craig raises an eyebrow, expectantly. I hold up the bud. Craig nods in approval. I pull my seatbelt over my chest and he takes off. "Where to next?" He asks me.

"Um, I don't know. What do you want to do?"

He shrugs, "What's down here. I kinda need some new headphones."

"They have a nice music store." And it's right next to the art store which I can't help but check out every time I come here, probably because there's only one art store in South Park and this one is different. It might have different stuff. If Craig goes into the music store I think I'll check out the art store.

"Where?"

"Take a left and it's on the right." He follows my directions and parks. We head out and start walking. Once we come up on the art store I slow down.

"You wanna go in there?" Craig asks right before I can tell him I might head in.

I nod. "You go get your head phones, I'll be out in a minute."

"Hold up, dude!" He says, grabbing my arm when I try to walk away. I turn back to him. He says, "Let me come with you. And then we can go to the music store together."

I suck my teeth. "Why? That's not very efficient."

"Well," he says, searching for some excuse, "It'll be better because we're together."

God! What a faggot! Does he hear himself? Is he doing this on purpose?Or does he mean it? Nononono, Tweek, don't fall for it. He probably told Thomas the same thing. "Fine." WEAK. I'M SO WEAK!

"Good." AND HE KNOWS IT! Craig trails behind me into and through the store. I walk down the same path straight to where I know the sketch books are. We come to a narrow aisle with tall shelfs stacked with, what seems like, billions of sketch books, billions of brands, and sizes. "I didn't know you drew."

"I draw." I tell him.

"Oh, thanks, Tweek." I nod, examing all the books. How many pages, page quality and texture, and of course, price. "Are you good?"

I shrug, "I don't know."

"Do people tell you they're good?" He rephrases.

"I don't let people see my pictures."

"Really? Me neither."

"You draw too?" This catches enough of my attention for me to turn to look at him.

"No, no," he says. He holds his hands up, his fingers making a small rectangular shape. He uses his curved index finger and wiggles it, like he's pressing a button and clicking pictures, "Photography." My mouth makes an O and I nod. Makes sense. "Do you know what you're getting?"

"Um," I bite my lip and set the book down. "No, I usually just look around. A lot of the times I don't get anything."

He makes a noise, "Then why did we come here first?"

"Sorry." I head over to the artist markers.

"You totally fucking aren't though, you asshole."

"You can buy me something if you want."

"What do you want?"

I glance at him. "I was joking." I pick out two skin tone markers. The markers are really expensive

"And I wasn't, so good job. What do you want?" I hand him the two markers. "That's it?" I nod. "Let's go then." Craig pays and then we walk into the music store next door.

Craig starts his search for headphones and I wonder over to the movie section. I start picking through the action movies, trying to see if there were any I hadn't seen yet. And when I finally do someone blows on my ear from behind.

I scream. But it's just Craig. I knew it was. Fuck.

"Hey, whatcha looking at?" I show him the cover of the movie I'm looking at. "What's that?"

"A movie." I say. "Did you find your headphones?"

He shrugs, "I wanna get good ones but I don't know... I don't like spending money on stuff like that." He tells me. "I'll probably break them anyways. So I wouldn't invest a lot of money into it."

"But, you want nice headphones."

"Yeah, it'd be nice, just not today." I consider this. And then I place the movie back down. "Look at music with me." Craig's walking away before I can even answer. I follow him anyways.

We walk over to where the albums are categorized by what type of music it is. Craig stops at the first genre which is rock and starts scrolling through the samples. He hands me the headphones. I place them on my head and watch the niorette. He seems to really like music.

A Red Hot Chelli Peppers song comes on that I've heard but only once starts to play in my ears and I nod approvingly. Craig starts through rap while I check out indie. I find a band I like, read through the songs, and put it back. Craig's still searching through the rap.

I hurry past him to the back of the store, grab a pair of high quality skull candy headphones and then run through an aisle to the cash register. There's no line, luckily for me and I drop them on the counter.

After paying I walk back to Craig, who's still searching through the rap and push the bag into his side. He glances at it and then at me. "Why."

"'Cause I don't spend money on a lot of things. Just weed and coffee and, so I thought I could buy you nice headphones like you want so you don't have to spend money and worry about it." I say. And, as if that wasn't enough I say, "Gifts are nice. I don't know! I got blue, because I thought it was your favorite color..."

He takes the bag but with a sour expression. "I can't believe you bought me thity dollar headphones."

"I mean, they aren't thirty dollars." He snatches the recept, reads it, and holds it in my face. "Like twenty five."

"Exactly."

I shrug, "I don't spend a lot. And you bought me stuff."

"Ugh."

"We have the headphones." I point out. "We should start heading back."

He nods and we start heading out the store. Halfway to the car, Craig stops. "I forgot my keys." He rushes back into the store and I wait at the car. It takes him a while to find his keys and when he does come back out he's holding a blue plastic bag from the store.

Things start to fall into place. "What'd you do?" I ask.

He holds the bag out to me and unlocks the car. Inside the bag is the action movie I was looking at, the album from the indie sections, and a portable phone charger. "A portable ch-charger...?"

"Now you can use your phone with out worrying because if it dies you can charge it." He explains. "Which is good because once you give me your number I'm gonna be texting you."

"My... number." He nods, holding his phone out to me. He has an Iphone. Why wouldn't he? Typical. I start to click in numbers. Once I'm done I hand him back the phone and we get in his car. "So fucking cold." I shiver.

"Here." He hands me his jacket. "I'm not that cold anymore." What is with this guy? I can't pin him. He's nice, he's not, he's rude, he's sweet. Over all... he's fucking hot. And we made out. So... there's that.

I accept his jacket and place it over me like a blanket. It's big enough to be one. For me, at least. "Thanks."

On the way back we stop at a pizza place because Craig is, 'starving to death'. It's a big red and white building with, 'Pizza House' going across the top.

When we walk inside there's a young woman attending the cash register. Her eyes set on Craig and they never leave him. I don't even think she knows I'm here. Craig kind of mumbles a, "Oh, God..." I don't know what that means.

She smiles, "Welcome to Pizza house. My name's Chrisy. What can I get you?" She has wacy brown hair and matching eyes. She only spoke to Craig, who's smiling. And Craig never smiles.

Craig says, "Just a medium pepporoni pizza." He tells the girl. "Thanks." He adds.

She nods, tapping in our order on the screen. "Is that all?"

"And a large lemonade." She finishes and gives Craig the price, he pays, and she hands him a receipt.

The girl hesitates. "Hey, so, do you go to school around here?"

Craig glances at me and I've been staring at him the whole time. He seems to be trying to tell me something but I'm too dense the get his mind message. I just continue to stare at him.

So when his arm slings around me and pulls me into his chest I could almost scream. I try not to look too shocked but I always look shocked or scared regardless. "No, I don't go to school over here."

Now the girl's looking at Craig's arm and it's like she's noticed me for the first time. "Are you... Are you two together?" She asks, seeming to not care how obvious it is that she cares.

"Yeah, he's my boyfriend." Craig says in his monotone-I-don't-give-not-a-single-fuck-way. "Why?"

The girl nods and shuts the cash register. "I'll go start your pizza." She heads to the kitchen.

I stare at Craig. "Dude, what the fuck?"

Craig shrugs, "Just pretend to be my boyfriend until we leave. You're already wearing my jacket." He shakes his head. "God, people are annoying."

We wait for our food. I stand, awkwardly with Craig's arm around me. He whispers, "Hold my hand. It'll look cute."

I snort, "Don't ever say that again."

"What?" He starts. "Cute?" I giggle. "Cute, cute, cute, cute, cute, cute,"

I start laughing, "Craig, stop! Oh, my god. You sound like such a faggot when you say that."

"Cute. I think guinea pigs are cute. Puppies are cute. I think you're cute. Blue is cute. Babies are cute- sike, babies are fucking stupid. Drugs are cute."

"Wait," I say but he won't stop.

"Jupiter's cute. Rasberries are super adorable." He's started talking like a girl.

"Wait! Wait! Wait!" I slap his shoulder. "Stop!" He stares at me expectantly. "Did you just call me cute?"

"Uhm..." He thinks. "Uh... Did I?"

"Craig!"

"Tweek, I said a lot of things were cute. So, it's possible it slipped my mind. Or I never said it and you're dellusional. Which seems to be a possibility too since when you're not super drugged up you're paranoid as fuck."

That kinda stings. But I don't think it's supposed to. How is Craig supposed to know that I'm sensitive about my drugs? Whatever. "Don't say that." I mutter, pulling out of his grasp.

"What?" He asks. "Are you still joking or are we being serious?"

"Pizza's done." Says Chrisy, bitterly. She sets down our pizza.

I leave Craig to get it while I find a table. They're all empty but that's worse because I have to choose one. Closest to the door means I have a better chance escaping during a fire but what if someone comes in to rob the store. I'll be the first person they aim their gun at.

Craig comes past me and sits at a booth in the middle of the building. I follow him. Once we've been sitting and eating for a minute he repeats, "Did I upset you when I talked about the drugs?" I nod, taking another bite of pizza and not looking up. "Why? You do drugs."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I'm proud of it or anything."

"But you told me you did. Why did you tell me if you aren't proud of it? Wouldn't you try to keep that to yourself then?"

"Fuck you. I was high."

"And that makes a difference?"

"Stop." I look up at him. His expression doesn't change. He doesn't look scared or even like he cares. He doesn't. Whatever. "I don't want to talk about this."

"Sure." He says, in an asshole way and continues eatting.

For a long time we just eat and don't talk. The whole time I'm just thinking about how maybe I over reacted but why does Craig care so much about why I care about my drug intake and how I'm fucking crazy and the only way to be 'normal' is excessive amounts of drugs. Ugh. The point is I just get more angry.

Suddenly Craig says, "You've got sauce on your lip. I got it." Had he just leaned across the table he would have never reached me. It was a combination of him saying it so fast and rigth after grabbing my chin and pulling me the other half-way across the table to reach him. He licks the sauce from my lip.

I yelp and blush. I push him back. "GAH!" He smiles. "I'm still mad."

"For what?" Craig asks.

God. "I don't know. You being an insensitive prick."

"Probably because I don't understand."

I sigh, "I don't wanna talk about the drugs! Just don't bring them up again." He nods, obediantly. "And what the fuck?! Aren't you supposed to be straight?"

"No, I'm pretty sure I'm 'supposed' to be asexual." He says, using air quotation marks around supposed. "Plus, right now I'm pretending to date you so you _could _talk a little softer."

"Whatever. You suck."

"Wow, even after I bought you pizza? Heartless..." I can't hold back my laugh. "Beautiful. Do it again."

"Shut up!" I laugh. "And I don't have to do anything for you. Especially with how little you smile."

"i could smile if I wanted to."

"Then smile."

Craig thinks and then says, "Well, that's no fair. I made you laugh. You have to make me laugh."

"That's dumb." I grumble. I know I can't make Craig laugh. That's so unfair! Craig doesn't even have a sense of humor. Bullshit. That's the catch. If I can make him laugh, then I can see him smile but you can't make Craig laugh so it doesn't even matter. "Gross. Take me home."

"So, are you gonna come to the party with me tonight."

A small part of me wants to verify exactly what Craig means when he says, 'with me'. As in _together _or just together? But I better not ask because this is probably just me being paranoid.

He did just lick my lip

"GEH!"

What's his problem anyway? When he said he's supposed to be asexual does that mean he is or was he being sarcastic because he actually isn't? And if Craig weren't asexual then what would he be? He's gotten blow jobs from Thomas and he's a guy. And he's made out with me and I'm a guy... But he isn't gay. But I haven't heard any stories about girls.

Except his virginity story with Bebe. But he said that was just to get it out the way. It didn't seem like he liked it either. Did he not like the sex part or the Bebe part? If he was with a guy would he have liked it better.

"Whats wrong, Cuddles?"

"Nng- Gah!- I just don't get you, man!"

"Okay, cool," Craig says. "Let's start heading back. It's gonna take a while."

"Don't ignore me! URG!"

"Probably like forty minutes, I think." He stands, grabbing our trash.

I scream, "Impossible!"

And then Craig laughs.

* * *

_Sorry for the typos... One day I'll fix all my mistakes. __Thanks for the reviews and positive feed back. I'll try to post quicker since I'm on spring break. Keep on reviewing and junk_


	3. Party

The remainder of the drive back to South Park consist of me trying my very best to keep, 'talking to Craig' at a minimum just because I have no idea what the fuck we're doing and I have a very strong belief that whatever it is, if we continue it will end badly. Just badly. And him trying his very best to make me talk to him, look at him, laugh, and, worst of all, accidently admit embarrassing things about myself.

By the time we're in my driveway I'm beat red, conflicted, and contemplating killing myself. "I'll pick you up around eight. I gotta do some stuff."

"Do some stuff..." I repeat to myself. "Why do you make it sound like you're gonna kill somebody."

"Because maybe you don't know me that well."

I scoff. "Okay, bye, Craig." I unbuckle my seat belt and throw open the door.

Craig grabs my arm. "Wait, what? No farewell kiss?"

I make a disgusted face, yank back my arm, and continue my exit. I slam his door behind me. Honestly, Craig is an asshole. What kind of guy flirts with someone who's gay, knowing good and damn well that they aren't gay?

Maybe it wouldn't be so cruel if he weren't so goddamn sexy. I pull out my keys.

UGH.

I drop my head against my front door, beat. He is really attractive. I push my keys in the lock and open my door, with my head still against the door, letting myself fall inside my still unoccupied home.

I think I like my home like this the best.

I drop my bags on the dining table and flop on the couch. I pull my phone out and dial Bebe's number. It rings a few times. "_Hey, girl, what's up?_"

"Its... Tweek."

"_Yeah, I know_." She says. "_Where have you been_?"

"It's actually a really long story." Only because I'd have such a hard time articulating everything.

"_Oooh, good_." I hear Bebe moving around a lot and then a car door shutting. "_You're gonna get me fired_." She says. "_I'm heading over now. Are you oing to Toke's tonight_?"

I twitch. It'll only take her five minutes to get here. "B-Bebe..."

"_I got you a pair of jeans anyway_."

"How'd you g-get- nng- my size?"

"_Kenny_."

I blush. Dammit, Ken. "Bebe, I'm not ready yet."

"_Take a shower so when I get there your hair is wet. I'm gonna get you ready. Are you going to Toke's_?" She repeats.

"Yeah, b-but-"

"_Good. I'm gonna make you so hot! Oooooh_!" The line goes dead.

Slowly my body starts to shake more. I scream, "GAH!" I jump to my feet and sprint up the stairs. "N-No- ngg- Time!"

I wanted to relax, I wanted to smoke, I wanted to eat, and take a Tweek shower. Now there's not gonna be any time for anything! No Tweek time! "AGH!" I rip off my clothes, twisting on the water.

Now I actually have to go to the party. I'm gonna look crazy. Bebe will be here any minute. What if she shows up while I'm in the shower and I don't hear her?

This just sucks so bad!

I get under the still majorly cold water and quickly lather and rinse my skin. I suds up my hair and then rinse out the shampoo, lastly adding conditioner. I hear a knock from downstairs.

That answers that. How'd she get here so quick?

I jump out, grab my towel, and dry off. I rush with my boxers and my gym shorts, leaving out my shirt completely so I can run downstairs and open my door for the blonde.

Bebe smiles at me. She holds up far more than one pair of jeans. "Some of the girls donated. One of these is bound to fit." I make a face but let her in anyways. "I also brought some stuff for your hair, smell, make up-"

"No way."

"Tweek! Just let me do it and if you don't like it, change."

"Nng..."

"C'mon," She pushes me towards the bathroom. "Tell me about why you skipped school."

"Ngg- Ugh, fine." She sets me in front of the mirror and starts brushing through my hair. "Craig came to me yesterday after school but instead he asked who's house I wanted to work at. So he planned to do the project... _with _me!"

"Oh, wow, really? What happen?"

"So we went to my place and ended up just smoking pot."

She laughs, "So cute."

"Don't joke because we made out after that." I say. She immediately stops laughing. "And today he asked me to skip with him. We went to North Park and I know it felt kind of like a date, but it really wasn't."

Bebe gaps at me in the mirror. "Seriously? He likes you?!"

"No, no, no, no!" I hold up my hands. "Definitely not. Craig can't like things, I think. I think he just likes sex, not people, so he uses people for things like blow jobs and making out."

"Yeah, don't tell anyone but I slept with him and... Jesus Christ it was terrible. He could, like barely even get it up. But, it was kinda cute to watch him all flustered." My jaw clenches. I resist the urge to tell her I already know this to avoid making it seem like I'm jealous. Because why would I be? I'm not, so there. "How do you feel about him? I mean you made out with him."

"Bebe, we were both high." She nods. "So, I don't really feel anything. I know what the making out was but I just can't understand everything after that. With the music store and the art store and the pizza and he just keeps trying to figure me out. No one can do that."

After Bebe finishes rubbing a bunch of crap in my hair, that oddly makes it look smooth and settled. I check out my image. "Whoa... How'd you do that?"

Bebe snorts. "It's not that hard, Tweek." She holds up a bottle of mousse. "You can keep this." She sets it on the counter. "Now, come try on these jeans."

I groan. But Bebe and I head upstairs and we go through three pairs of jeans before finding a pair that aren't too tight and aren't too baggy. I come to find out they're Wendy's and she was right when she said hers would fit me. "Look at that booty!" With this Bebe pairs a plaid dark green and white button down and a sweater over that, pulling the collor out from under the sweater. "You'd look so fucking good with some glasses." Bebe mumbles, messing with my hair. "But, I guess you still look sufficienty attractive."

"Oh, thanks, I guess."

Bebe stands back and admires her work. "Wear your vans."

I smack my teeth, "But I wanted to wear my converse. Converse would look so good with this."

"No way!" She argues. "Your converse are dirty. Vans make you look cool."

"I like my dirty converse!"

"Craig's not gonna like converse."

"Craig doesn't give a fuck about what shoes I wear!" Bebe pulls back, knowing I'm right. "But..." She looks at me. "If you think I should wear the vans than I guess..."

I throw the shoes on and Bebe claps. "You look great!" She looks at her phone. "Oh, God. Listen, I gotta go. Work and shit, but you look great. I'm gonna be at the party. I'm gonna show up late but I'll be there so I'll see you soon!" Bebe rushes, grabbing her stuff and rushing out of my room.

Now what am I supposed to do for the next two hours?

I settle with going on a cleaning frenzy and then taking two aderal before smoking some of the weed I got today. And somehow before I know there's knocking at the door.

When I open the door Craig's standing there wearing the same thing he was when he left. "Hey," He's gonna be embarrassed when he realizes how good I look and he's gonna wanna change. But, I'm so fucking ready to party so I don't even give a fuck. He checks me out and smirks, "What'd you do to your hair, Cuddles?"

"First, stop fucking calling me that. I'm seriously gonna kick you in your shit." I point at him. "And second, I owed Bebe."

Craig chuckles, "Don't say it like that. You look great."

"Yeah, and you look like shit." He flicks me off. Oh, my god. Craig used his middle finger on me. I'm so honored. I was 'Craig-middle-fingered'. He middle fingered me. I burst into laughter. "Oh, my fucking God." What the hell is wrong with me?

Craig pauses before getting in his car. "Are you high?"

I giggle in a very high-like manner. I put my finger over my mouth and sh him. "Don't call the cops."

"We have cops in South Park?" I just start laughing again. Who knew Craig was funny? He's fucking hilarious. We get in his car and he pulls out. "You couldn't wait until I picked you up?"

"Yes, I could. But I didn't do that. That's not what I did, C." I feel the need to touch his face. Would Craig kill me if I touched his face? There's really only one way to find out.

"Yeah, okay,"

"C," Craig nods in acknowledement. "I'm gonna touch your face now." He glances at me. Oh no, he's gonna kill me. I didn't even actually do it yet. With his eyes. He's gonna kill me with his cold stare. I knew I'd die this week. I knew it. I fucking called. When his glance turns into a stare I freeze dramatically.

"What are you doing now?"

"Madusa stare."

"Huh?" We come to a red light and he turns to me. "Madusa stare? What are you talking about."

"You're stare is so icy. The girls agree with me."

"The one's you sat with at lunch the other day?"

"You remember shit like a encyclopedia." I tell him. "And yes. They think that you are super intimidating."

"I feel like we've already covered this."

"Covered what?" I blink. "That you're a book? When was that? Was I sober?"

He sighs. I just like to hear him talk. "Me being intimidating. I already fucking know this."

"...And?"

He groans. "You're point. What's you're point?" Craig sounds annoyed. It's still cute. Still. As in, I've always thought we was. But who doesn't think he's attractive?

"Um... I don't know. What were we talking about?" My thoughts are way better that reality. I should always be high. Tonight I'm getting fucking wasted.

With Craig.

And then we'll have sex.

Wait.

I go into a giggle fit. "What did you take?" Craig asks. I can't tell if he's seriously mad or like, not seriously mad. I just think he's short tempered. Or impatient. Maybe both. I've been in therapy. I should help him. Like I was helped.

"Did someone touch you as a child?" I say through an intermission of my giggling.

"Seriously, are you gonna be okay?"

"You'll be okay as soon as we get drunk." Oh, look we're at Token's. His house is huge! I love this place. I've only been here once when I was little but I remember loving it, I think.

Craig turns off the car, "I'm not a good drunk." He says.

"There are good drunks?" I pop open Craig's glove department. I feel like I should have the right to go through his stuff since he's been through my stuff right? Well I already am. Some tissues, some lotion... I snicker. There's the car stuff everyone keeps in their glove department. Some albums, old papers, condoms, of course. Who's car is this?

He snorts, "Toke's a good drunk. And this is my car." My eyes flick over to him. I said that. I didn't think that. I said it. He watches me go through his things.

"Good to know." Under all the crap there's a small leather case. I pop it open. There are some vintage looking black glasses. I put them on and look at Craig. "Who's glasses?"

His brows furrow. "Their mine." He says. "They're in my car."

I blink at him. "Are you being for real?"

"Yes?"

"Holy shit. Holy shit! Put them on right now! Oh, my God!" I rush removing the frames from my face and shove them towards his. He takes them and puts them on. I'm gonna orgasm.

I start laughing. "So fucking cute. That's adorable." I wanna kiss him again. Because we made out. I remember that. I remembered. Now I wanna kiss him again. But how do I articulate? Should I? It doesn't sound like a 'high-Tweek' decision.

I take his glasses back and put them back on. They're only reading glasses so they don't fuck my vision. "Define, 'not a good drunk."

"Define, 'onomonopia'." He shoots back.

"Define, 'fuck you, C'." I can be smart when I'm high. I beam. I'm a genius.

Craig taps my chin. "Cute. Do it again."

I frown immediately. "Die." He starts to choke. "Wait, no! I was kidding. Does this mean I have two more wishes?"

"If I said yes...?" We make it to the Black's front door. It's way taller than even Craig and it's ;double door'-ed. Damn, he got money. I think Token's dad's some kind of super famous surgeon and his mom does business. Like, international business. My guess is that this is just one of many houses around America, or even the world and that's why they're always gone. And Token likes it here the best because it's quiet.

"But that's just my conspiracy."

"Well, you're mostly right. Except Toke doesn't like it here. His parents make him stay here because despite South Park being full of racist, red neck, dumbfucks they know it's safe. I don't know what they're thinkning with that one. They're probably right. What kind of trouble could he get into here?"

I stare at Craig. "...Right." And at what point did I start talking and stop thinking? Man, life's hard. "We should go inside. I'm curious to see you drunk."

"You just wanna make-out. We should've just stayed at your place." He smirks.

"Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? I freaking hate partys, now can I have a drink?"

Craig pushes the door open, "Yes, Tweek, you can have a drink." With that I could've ran inside the house to the kitchen, but the sight of all the sweaty teenagers smudged together dancing and being hormonal beasts stops me in my tracks.

Drugs are wearing off. I whine and turn to Craig. "Help me."

He makes a face. "I don't wanna do it either."

Some guy starts to head towards the stairs with a girl. "An opening! C'mon." I grab Craig's arm and we move through the people. Some girl grind on me. She smelled like vomit. I see The Fantabulous Foursome in the living room and gag and finally we make it to the kitchen.

There are still a lot of people but less than the living room. This makes me feel way better. I notice Craig brushing himself off. Weird. I'm about to start taking shots but Craig just grabs the bottle of whiskey and hands me a beer, taking one for himself too. "I need to find Clyde and Toke. Come with me."

"Okay."

Now he leads me through kids. And if I thought Token's house was big looking at it outside... Jesus Fuck, it's huge. Craig and I walk through two rooms and a hallway and we still haven't reached a dead end. Token and Clyde ended up being in the hall leading to the living room.

When we walk up Token and Clyde both smile at us and it seems so genuine. I think I'm really good at reading people. "Hey, man," Token greets Craig, who nods. "Tweek," I didn't think he was gonna acknowledge me. They never do. Craig did. Pfft, no he didn't. Kinda. I don't know what's going on. I should probably say hi.

"Hey,"

That was great. "Craig, I'm so happy you came. We're gonna start playing 'would you rather' and 'never have I ever' soon." Clyde tells us. None of that sounds appealing. I sip my bear. Craig had to open it for me. He can do it with his mouth. I wonder if that fucks with his teeth. That'd suck, considering he had braces for the longest. He's still hot.

Craig looks just as uninterested as me. "I don't think I'm gonna play."

Clyde groans, "You have to! Why'd you come?!"

"Let me drink first and then I'll check back in with you."

"Ew, no way! We know how you get when you're drunk." Craig waves the brunette off. "Craig."

"Did you bring what I asked for?"

Clyde sighs, "I did."

"So can I have it?" Clyde shrugs. "Then I'm just gonna drink." Clyde shoves his hand in his pocket and pulls out something. "Thank you." Craig takes it from his hand and puts it in his pocket. Oh, marijuana has made an appearance.

"You're welcome." Clyde grumbles.

"Give me an hour, maybe."

"Where are you going?"

"Guest room four." Craig answers, quickly, wanted to leave but being pulled back.

"What's with you and guest room four?" Token asks.

Craig shrugs, "I like it. It's compact but roomy and blue and I lost my virginity in there."

"Yet, you still won't tell me who the lucky girl was." Clyde complains. "I told you who my first was."

"I don't care." Craig tells the boy, simply. "So, if you'll excuse me." He grabs me and pulls me behind him. I wave to the two boys, as nonchalantly as I can. This looks weird. It definitely does. Will no one care because it's Craig? Everyone knows I'm gay.

I really want that whiskey. And the weed.

Craig helps me not fall down the stiars and we end up in a bedroom at the end of a very long hallway. No one intoxicated would make it this far before throwing up, passing out, or dying.

Glad I'm not fucked up right now.

It's dark and Craig doesn't turn on the light. He locks the door, shoves his jacket under the opening in the bottom, and then hops on the bed and shuts the vent. "All of Toke's other guest rooms are fancy as shit. this one's the normal-est. I like it. Especially in this house. This house makes me feel like shit."

I note this. Craig comes back and sits on the bed. I sit next to him, criss-cross. He pulls out the bag Clyde gave him and a pipe. "You know I had weed. Good weed." I say.

"This _is _good. And I didn't want to use more of your weed. Makes me feel like shit."

I note this. Something that makes Craig feel like shit means it's something he cares about and Craig doesn't care about much, but maybe he does after all.

He lights up. I take the bottle of whiskey from him and while he smokes I start taking shots. Without shot glasses it's just me taking swigs from the bottle and guessing shot glass amounts. "It's so gross."

I feel Craig pull the bottle from me and begin to whine but he replaces it with a lighter and a pipe. "Aw, I love you."

Craig starts laughing. "I love you too."

My heart skips and my stomach flutters. Craig feels! That's a lie. I know he's being funny because he's getting high and I'm getting drunk. Still, hearing him say it at all. Would he know if I didn't say anything? Know what? What if I'm talking right now?! "Oh, my God!" I care too much about EVERYTHING.

Craig so kindly refilled the bowl for me. He even packed it. That's why I love him. I light bud and take a hit. I start slapping Craig's arm to get his attention before I release the smoke. I do rings. That's one's new. I'm still perfecting it. "Onion rings." I tell him.

"That's amazing."

"Thanks."

He continues to drink. I smoke. We switch. So on, so forth. The room is full of smoke. It's really dark. I'm staring at Craig. His hat's all askew from him laying down and moving around but now he's not moving at all. His eyes are closed. If he's sleeping he doesn't look like the other time I saw him sleeping. He looks peaceful. Doesn't sit right on his face.

You know what does though?

What does sit on Craig's face?

My lips.

Or maybe I should. Maybe I should sit on his face.

Craig chuckles. His eyes look at me. His cold blue eyes. But not dead. They aren't dead. They're hazy though. "Please." He says. I have no idea what he means. "Please, sit on my face, Tweek."

"Are you fucking serious." I say, deadpan. "I said that outloud. Are you fucking joking with me right now. Oh, my God that's so embarrassing. I'm gonna kill myself."

"Ca'm down. I love you so it's fine."

I snicker, "Oh, yeah."

"I need to go back to Clyde."

"But you just said you love _me_. Why do you need _him_?"

"I do love you, but I need to tell him about the game. I don't fucking wanna play."

"Me either. I can't see."

"I'm taking these." He takes his glasses and puts them on. "You're gonna go blind." He sits up, pulling me up with him. I hate him now. I loved him but now I hate him. Death upon Tucker. Ew. Ugh. "Let's go."

"There's no way." I say. "I can't go all the way down there and then back up."

"Yes, you can! Stop being difficult."

I roll around the bed. Even with my eyes closed I can see colors. Like rainbow zig zags. "No, I don't think I can. Craig..." I probably could of gotten up if I hadn't had that whiskey. But, I definitely did. And I regret nothing. No, I regret not kissing Craig. Or sitting on his face. Because I'm almost positive at some point he wanted me to. Did that actually happen? "Carry me." I demand. "And you gotta help me up."

I move my head to see the niorettes reaction. Which is, absolutely nothing. Obviously. He thinks over my request. He runs his hand over his face. "You are so extra." He kneels next to the bed. "Hurry up."

I will not point out the fact that he didn't help me up because I didn't think he was gonna do it at all. I crawl over to the end of the bed. I throw my legs over the edge and on either side of Craig. I wrap my arms around his neck and he hauls me up. "Not very heavy. Not really surprising."

"Shuddup." I mumble into his neck. Mmm... Craig's neck feels so nice against my lips. I wanna kiss it.

Craig walks over to the door. I help him out and open it. I wasn't going to because he's somewhat of an asshole but I just wanna make out with him and I feel like the sooner we're done talking to Clyde the sooner my dreams come true. I can't tell if Craig really isn't struggling or if he's pretending he isn't. Wouldn't that be nice of him? Pretend like I'm not fat.

He must not really be struggling because Craig is not nice.

He even makes it down the stairs without a single grunt. When we make it to the bottom. Token and Clyde walk up to us. Token snickers, "Adorable."

"He may already be hammered." Craig explains. I am no such thing. But I probably shouldn't say anything. I don't trust myself right now. My judgement is not clouded.

"And what about you?" Token asks.

Craig nods, "I dont know. I drank a lot. It'll hit me soon, I think."

Clyde wraps around Craig. "I always ask you to carry me."

I growl. "Back off." Token and Clyde laugh but I'm so serious.

"Because Tweek weighs the same as a toddler and you weigh the same as a semi-truck." I start to slip and Craig shifts, lifting me back. This is so awkward but right. I rest my face back into his neck. I kind of wanna dance.

Maybe I can stand. I don't think Craig likes dancing and I'd only do it with him.

Clyde crosses his arms. "WHAT A FUCKING ASSHOLE! Okay, I still love you. You're so confidential about your feelings but I know you love me too." Clyde's drunk, I realize for the first time. Probably took me long because I'm also a little tiny bit drunk. My judgement is not clouded. Fuck you.

"What are you talking about?" Token asks me.

"I ramble." Why can't people let me just think/talk to myself when I'm high? Ugn. Token nods with that and Clyde's trying to hug Craig, I think. Craig doesn't resist so now Clyde's snuggling him. And me, I guess.

Token starts talking to Craig about his parents and where they are but I'm only half listening. Craig smells really nice. Like weed and boy. No, like clean laundry and soap. And then something else I can't pin. I appreciate his freshness. He didn't shower at my house so he must've done it after he left but then why was he wearing the same clothes? Because they smells clean? That's kinda gross. It's okay, I'd just rather not know when he does it. But he doesn't care, I'm sure.

Clyde drops Craig and let's out some barbariac shreik, running into the group of kids. I pick my head up. "Oh, shit." Craig says, setting me down. I cry.

"What's happening?" I ask. Token groans. "What?"

I see Clyde in front of Kenny. They're shouting at each other, both obviously drunk. It's kind of funny. I wonder if they'll fight. From what I can tell Clyde's upset that Kenny was trying to make a move on Bebe. Hey, Bebe's here. She doesn't seem to care that any of this is going on but smiles and waves when she sees me.

"I'm gonna break it up." Token starts over towards the idiots. Clyde grabs Kenny by his shirt. Bebe's strolling into the kitchen. Funny. Token says, "You two need to calm down. You're just drunk. Plus, you're gonna upset Bebe. Look, she left." They look around and then appear to get really sad that she's gone. This is better than cable. It's like they're babies because they're drunk. They act so immature.

I lean against Craig. Right when everything's about to be good and the party goes back on, Eric Cartman comes out of the crowd and boo's Token. "Fuck off, Token! You're such a prick! Just let them fight and stop being a pussy for once! Fucking black people, man."

Token growls. Apparently he's been harboring a lot of rage for Cartman because he snaps. "Why the fuck are you here anyway?! No one invited you. No one would EVER invite you! Except, maybe, Butters because you suck his balls. You make fun of me because I'm black but I spend in a week what your whole house costs. I'm better looking than you and I. Have. A. Dad."

"Oh, shit." I look at Craig. He's got the biggest grin on his face. Like, cheek to cheek and I can see his teeth. Even his cold eyes look brighter and happy. I never thought I'd see Craig like this. I take my phone out for a picture.

Cartman attacks Token. But Token fights right back. In the backround Clyde throws a punch at Kenny because, 'it's his fault his fat friend attacked Token'. So now they're both fighting. I aim my camera at them instead and start a video. I make sure to catch Craig's smile though.

Stan and Kyle rush over to stop it and Craig breaks away from me, excitedly. "I've been waiting for this." He says, rushing into the crowd. Craig throws a punch at a very unexpecting Stan and just starts whamming on him.

I can't help but laugh. This is amazing. The Fantabulous Foursome are fighting with Craig and those guys. Amazing. After watching Kyle struggling for a minute I head over and start kicking Craig in the calf. I keep getting harder and until he lets Stan out of the headlock he has him in. "What?" He asks, aggrivated.

"We need to break that up." I point to Token and Cartman. Cartman's bigger but he can't fight at all so Token's pretty much winning. I think. Craig groans and drops the other dark haired boy who yelps.

"What the fuck, dude!"

Craig snickers. "Alright, c'mon, Cuddles." He walks over to Token and whispers something to him as he's punching and it makes him slow to a stop. Cartman would have kept going if Kyle and Stan weren't holding him back at this point. And lastly, Craig and I grab Clyde.

"Ya okay?" Craig asks the boy.

Clyde's still huffing but he nods, "He was hitting on my girlfriend. Stupid faggot man whore. Agh!" He groans. "I need a smoke and a beer." He storms off. Token follows.

The Fantabulous Foursome are escorted out of the building.

I hate them so, great.

I'm so tired. I need a bed. I also need Craig to carry me back up the stairs. I'm not even joking. I tell him as much. He just shrugs. "I got to beat up Stan Marsh, Tweek. I'm so happy."

"That's good, I guess. You," I poke him in the chest, "need to carry me up the stairs." I inform him.

"Yes, I know." He looks around. "Bebe wants you."

"Huh?" I see Bebe motioning to me from the kitchen. "Okay. Stay here."

Craig glances at all the kids around us. "I will not." He says.

I roll my eyes. "Why you gotta be so difficult, man?"

"I just can't stay here. I'm gonna head upstairs."

"_Can't_?"

"Bye." Craig disappears in the crowd and I go to the kitchen. "Hey," I say to Bebe, who's smiling and wearng a dress now. She looks good. I can see Kenny hitting on her.

"How long have you been here? I haven't seen you at all. Except just now. Wow, I can't believe that happened." I point towards the living room with my thumb. "That was mad funny though. Really."

She nods and hands me a drink. I down it. "They're animals. But I love when they fight over me. I don't even really wanna be with either of them."

I laugh. "Clyde thinks you two are together. How did that happen?"

She shrugs, "Probably because I call him my boyfriend. He gives me shoes."

"Oh, okay."

Bebe slaps my arm, "I'm not a gold-digger!" She shouts. "It's called stragedy. I'm just smart."

"Right."

"Ugh. What about you and Mister Mystery." I make a face. "Craig." She whispers.

I lean against the wall because I feel like I'm gonna fall or die. "Yeah, I know who you're talking about. Why are you calling him that?"

She continues to whisper. "Code name. So people won't know who we're talking about." Then why are you whispering? She giggles.

"Yeah, well, I've been trying to make out with him all night." Did I say that? I did. I meant it too. I can't even laugh. Even though Bebe's dying. Is she drunk?

My judgemnt is not clouded.

"Is he drunk?" She asks. I nod. "Then, damn, Tweek, _get it_! _All _of it."

"Nah." I shake my head. "I would but Craig's got this, like, way good memory even when he's fucking hammered. He'd remember it and know I intiated it and everything I was doing. I am really stoned but I'm not stupid."

She sucks her teeth. "Boo, you suck. Whatever. I'm gonna actually try to hook up with Token, I think. I'm done with these petty pretty boys. I want a taste of smart and sexy. I have a feeling that's what you're getting into."

"i don't think Craig's smart." I tell her. "And don't do that to Clyde and Token's friendship. That would make you a slut." I say. "I'm going upstairs but don't do that. Just get with Clyde, he's a really nice guy. Think about it."

I will let Clyde know he owes me one.

Craig didn't carry me upstairs. I had to do it my damn self because he couldn't stay downstairs and wait for me. I will let him know he also owes me one. Asshole. That's probably why he left.

So I trudge my ass up the stairs, finally realizing the state of drunkness I'm in. I fall three times, trying to make it down the Black's long hallways. But after way too long I finally make it to the bedroom.

I'm not sure how long Craig was in here but he's managed to drink all the rest of the whiskey, which could have been a lot but I don't exactly recall. He's on the bed on his stomach with his face in the pillow. Oh yeah and he's shirtless.

That's nice. He has a very sexy back. "You took forever." He mumbles into the pillow. He sounds... odd.

"Sorry. I would have been faster if you had carried me." I point out and stumble onto the bed with him. Craig makes a strange noise and his whole body moves with it. My brow crinkles. "Sit up, man."

"Mm..." He says. That was a no. But I need him to.

"Seriously," I start tugging his arm but he's so heavy. "Oh, my god..." I try tickling him but he's not ticklish. I try licking him but he doesn't care. Finally I manage to just roll him over.

His face is wet.

"Are you hot-" They're tears. "What's wrong?! Oh, my God..." Craig Tucker is crying. What do I even do? What did I do? What's wrong with him? Is he hungry? Does he have to go potty? Is he tired? Should I burp him?

I used to do babysitting in middle school. Why anyone would trust their infant with a crazy-ass twelve year old fag is beyond me. I feel like my parents paid them to let me do it. That's not profittable.

I let Craig go and he just flops down like a dead body. "You were gone forever. I didnt think you were ever coming back. I didn't want you to go." He says, more tears streaming down his cheeks.

He's a beautiful cry-er. I cry so ugly. I'm loud and I make embarrassing noises. Snot is running down my face and... just ew. But Craig's so graceful. Just like water flowing from within. I'm a like a poet.

"I wanted you here and you weren't." He says, staring at the cieling.

"Aw." I think, maybe eighty angels just died. I will never make Craig cry again. I crawl over to him and wipe his face. "I'm sorry I wasn't here for you. But I'm here now. Please stop leaking."

His eyes drag over to mine and it's like I'm looking in a mirror. His eyes are so pretty. I feel like someone shouldn't be allowed to look this attractive. How unfair. I'm so ugly. Jeez. He should give me some of his good looks. "Yeah."

"And you're here. And we're here together."

He chuckles, "Yeah."

I run my thumb over his cheek and inch closer. "And you're not wearing a shirt..." My leg hits his, "strangely."

He laughs. "I got hot."

"Are you better now?" I smile.

Craig suddenly frowns again. "No."

I blink at him. "Alright. What's wrong?"

"We haven't kissed yet."

"But you're hot."

"It'll be fine, I'm sure." He says. "Plus, you're super cold so c'mere." He yanks me on top of him and I have no objections to this.

"You sure? You're drunk."

He gives me a look. "And the sky is blue."

"Oh yeah."

Craig kisses me and it makes my finger tips tingle. My legs tangle with his and his chest presses against mine. This was such a bad idea. Craig is such a good kisser. His tongue traces my lip.

Why does this boy wanna kiss me? What does he want? Does he even know? I don't care.

My hands run up his torso, around his shoulders, and on as much back as I can get. His hands fall from my waist. AGGH! This sucks. I just wish he'd touch me too, but he won't because wasn't this for him? Or was it for me?

Something gropes me and I yelp.

Craig pulls back. "I'm sorry."

"No- No... Not a bad yelp. A surprised yelp." I say.

"It's just..." He starts, "These jeans makes your ass look so nice. Please never take them off."

Noted. Saved. I will keep these pants and wear them forever. "You can do whatever you want." I whisper near his ear. I start to kiss it and his hands go back to my ass.

I love mind readers. Kenny can do it too but he's not my type. "What the fuck. Don't talk about him when your lips are on me and my hands are on your ass." Craig growls.

"Fuck. I need to work on that."

"I'm your type?" He asks. Fuck. "No wonder you wanted to make out with me so bad."

"I didn't." Yeah, I did. "But you seem like you want to more."

"I'm more open about it. But that's only because I know how much you want it so I don't really care about bein subtle." But I was being subtle. "No, you weren't." Craig assures me. "You're like a cat in heat. It's kind of appealing."

"I'm really finding it hard to believe that you don't get turned on. You're so sexual."

"Stop talking." His lips are back on mine, parting them with his tongue. I, gladly ablidge. He tastes like smoke and alcohol and then... something chocolate. When did he have chocolate? He's making me hungry. In a lot of ways.

This was a really bad idea.

My judgement... may be slighly clouded. Or maybe a lot. Probably the latter. I wouldn't worry about it.

One of Craig's hands trails up and under my shirt onto my back. Lovely. His lips abandon mine, sadly, but go to my neck instead and I still can't figure out who this is for. "There is something that turns me on." He breathes against me.

"What is it?"

"Gonna have to figure it out." I definitely won't find it tonight. Mostly because I'm pretty set on not sleeping with him. But this is nice. Just kissing. And his hands are nice. He's nice. I start to play with his hair. He seems to like it.

He pulls at my shirt and I take it off. "I wanna..." He says, "I wanna touch you. Here." He finger tip just barely brushes my nipple. I take in a deep breath. He can't. He can't because that's my spot. And if he touches me I know I'm gonna-

Craig sits up and flips us. I'm not okay with this. His hand's resting on my chest and he seems to sense my reluctance because he presses his lips to mine and does the slow, sweet kisses I like but also the ones that make me feel good. So when his thumb runs over my chest I feel like I could die.

I shiver and he takes my nipple between his index and thumb and starts massaging. I make a strangled noise into my hand. I don't care. This is so embarrassing and I refuse to make any noises.

Craig seems to just be... observing me. He lifts from my mouth and I see him moving. He better not.

I'm getting hard. That is not good.

Craig's mouth wraps around the nipple and I can feel his tongue moving swirls around it. My back arches and I whine. "I can't. You _have _to stop." I tell him. When he ignores me I take a fistful of his hair and yank his head up. "'Cause you can't and won't be able to handle the consequences. You will stop."

Craig gives me disappointed eyes but he knows I'm right. That's why he rolls off me and onto his side. I roll behind him and cuddle into his back. He is hot. Which is good for me because I _am _cold. "Night, C."

"Goodnight, Cuddles."

* * *

_I did not read through this. But do you want a new chapter or what? Ionno..._


	4. Interruption

I initially woke up due to the light seeping through the window past the curtains. However, I stayed awake for the half naked, dressing Craig in the corner of the room. He's sorting through some clothes in a dresser.

My fucking head is pouding and the light hurts but I still watch, silently. It's not like he takes off his boxers so it's not creepy. I just so happened to wake up right now and not announce it. Not my fault. You can't blame me. Craig's back is very nice, as are his thighs, and his ass.

I have morning wood. I never have morning wood. What is this shit? A hang over, naked Craig, and morning wood? Perfect. Great.

Craig keeps clothes at Token's place. A little bit weird but Craig's a lot weird so whatever. I got to see him change because of it. God bless.

Once Craig's pants are on I finally let out a groan. He turns to me, not really showing any signs of surprise that, 'hey, I've actually been awake for a while. And possibly watching you.' I think maybe he knew. Most likely he just didn't care. When he decided to change he must've known that there was a chance I'd wake up.

"Can you shoot me? I wanna die." I cover my head with a pillow and continue to whine.

"Toke's got pain killers and coffee, the whole shebang. Don't even worry about it." I hear his voice closer than he was before.

"I can't remember anything." I mumble.

"We had sex."

I remove my face from the pillow momentarily. "I remember that that didn't happen." And then it's back in it's place. "Fuck you."

I hear him chuckle and then he says, "C'mon, let's go get hang over food. Toke's kitchen is like a resturant. And I am a chef."

See, that sounds great except for one thing... I still have a crazy morning boner. That's normal. Guys get these all the time but why now? Why in front of Craig?!

I swear, I will never leave this bed. Not in this lifetime. "Uhm..." I move the pillow again. "That sounds... _great_."

"Doesn't sound like you think it sounds '_great_'."

"No, it does! Just, I'm still tired so you should definitely go do that and then I'll head down in a few." I smile at him.

Craig blinks at me. "What? Are you gonna jack off?"

I yelp and twitch. "No! What the fuck?!" I sit up. "I gotta go to the bathroom- n-not for that though! Ngg- Agh!- Fuck you!" I throw the blanket off of me and push past the niorette.

Right when I reach for the door knob an arm comes around my stomach and pulls me back in. My immediate response is to hit the ground and sit in a position where I'm sure my situation is... _situated_.

Craig stares down at me. "Are you okay?" What am I supposed to do? I need to get him distracted so I can make an escape. Once I get to the bathroom I know he'll leave me alone. Craig doesn't seem to have a lot of energy because he just doesn't care about anything.

How do I distract him though? He won't fall for, 'look at that!'. If I could knock him over, that'd be the best but I could never over power him.

I have an idea. It's crazy but it may work.

"C," I say in a hushed voice, "c'mere."

"Down there?" He asks. I nod. "Why? What's wrong with you?"

"Just, come here, dammit!" And with that Craig kneels infront of me. I don't know if I can actually do this. Maybe I'll have enough time with him just on the ground like this. No, he'd grab me and that wouldn't be good. So, just do it, Tweek. This is you're only chance.

Oh, Jesus, he's right in my face. That's perfect though. His eyes are back to their nuetral blue color. I remember them being lighter for some reason. I want a picture of him. I'd put it in my wallet. With a deep breath, I place my hand on his cheek and kiss him as hard as I can.

My face flushes with heat and my heart throbs. I think I may have actually shocked Craig. Acheivement unlocked. Before I get too into this... I shove Craig back, roughly, knocking him into the nightstand and then I take off again. This time, successfully.

Once I'm locked in the bathroom it doesn't take me long to find the towels and wash rags and I decide the best thing to do is take a cold shower.

Craig is a smart guy. He must know. Maybe not right away but he'll think about it because that was weird. It was pretty fucking weird. And then he'll start asking himself questions like, why I didn't want to get up, why I tried to run away, why I fell to the floor like that, why did I kiss him? Why did I shove him? Why was I trying to not get up? He'll think about how it's morning and I just woke up. Oh, my God. I wish he would've just shot me when I asked.

I can't remember anything.

I know we went to the party. I know I saw Bebe at some point. I know we drank and smoked and did we talk? If we did, dear Christ, about what? What have I told him? Oh, God...

Oh! There was a fight! And Craig punched Stan. And he gave me a piggy back ride. I'm not sure that was a great idea but okay, it happened. After that I'm drawing blanks. I'm sure I can trust Craig to fill me in, I'm just not entirely sure that I wanna know because I _do _remember being very... uhm. For lack of better word, I wanted to make out with him all night. That's the only thing I remember clearly. I'm not gonna say I was horny. I'm positive I didn't sleep with him and pretty sure I wouldn't have.

Token's shower has so many choices. I could smell like rasberry or Deep Space- oooh! But, despite it's name rasberry smells way better, plus the bottle's pink and sparkly, just like my personality. Haha just kidding, I hate everything.

But it smells better.

By the end of my shower I'm shivering from already being cold before I stepped in, my hair smells like cocoanuts, my body smells like fruit, and I'm boner-free! I find some spare tooth brushes in the cabinet, thank God, because my breath is so bad from the alcohol._ I can not believe I kissed Craig like this._ I push that thought to the back of my mind because I'm not even sure how he'll react that I did any of that in the first place. Not to mention, I completely forgot about him possibly knowing about my problem anyway just from the way I reacted.

I should've just been honest. BUT HOW BAD WOULD THAT HAVE SUCKED?! Like, really _really _bad. Who knows what would have happened? God. But at least then I wouldn't have kissed him with a boner.

Life.

I crack the bathroom door and peek down the corridor. There's no signs of civilization. So I slip around the piece of dark wood and back to the room.

I search the bed for my phone and my wallet and instead come across a pair of glasses. Who the fuck are these? I don't wear glasses...

I pocket them.

When I find my items I'm back in the hall. I decide to stop trying to hide after realizing Craig is my ride home and if we talk about it, we're gonna fucking talk about it. Don't fight the inevitable. I shouldn't stress over it either. So I pretend to be casual but my casual isn't even casual so my 'pretend-casual' is pretty fucking sketchy.

I hear people talking downstairs and identify the voices as Bebe, first because Bebe's voice is loud and travels, Clyde, Token, and then lastly, Craig because he doesn't really say much. Oddly. He says a lot of shit when he's with me. Maybe he doesn't do well in crowds.

I tip toe my way down the stairs, just because I'm a quiet person in general, not because I'm still hiding, but maybe subconciously that. However, I'm also a super clumsy person too. That kind of neutralizes the whole quiet thing and you end up with me falling down the stairs.

And that's exactly what happened.

I scream, of course. It was a pretty bad fall too. I'm used to falling. I'm used to hurting myself. But I'm never used to the injuries. The pain doesn't even bother me, it's the results. Like scrapping my knee is fine, but when it starts to bleed I have a panic attack, usually and then pass out, sometimes. Most of the time.

Luckily, though, I didn't cut myself falling down the stairs. I probably very badly bruised myself in several areas and also have a mild concusion, probably. No big deal, I don't sleep anyways.

Everyone's come out of the kitchen by now.

The fall was fine. I'm hurting a lot in a lot of places. Mostly my ankle. Like a lot in my ankle. Holy Jesus Christ, fire in my ankle! Once I've collected myself enough to sit up, at the bottom of the stairs on my bum, I will add. I check out the burning sensation. At least it's not bent some odd way it's not supposed to be able to bend. That was what I was worried about. Because that's after blood. I'd probably vomit. And then die. Probably. But it does look... wrong.

"Oh, my God, Tweek." Bebe is the first to speak. "Are you okay?"

As soon as I nod Clyde starts laughing hysterically. "Dude, what the fuck! That was hilarious!" I narrow my eyes at him. "What?" He says. "I made sure you were okay before I laughed." Craig shakes his head and stares at me with the lot of them. I'm not sitting here because I want someone to help me up. I'm sitting here because I feel like a failure and when things like this happen I like to take a moment to lather in my lameness.

Usually I'm alone so I can curl into a ball on my side and lay on the floor for an hour. I'll just think to myself. I should use my medication for what it's prescribed for... HA! That's funny.

I smashed the glasses in my back pocket. I fish them out and Craig sighs. "Great." He says. They must be his. _At what point did Craig start wearing glasses? _is my first question and then my second one would have to be, _how much are glasses_?! Because I think I'm gonna have to be paying for some.

Craig'd be fucking sexy in some glasses. Did he wear them last night? No, I'd remember something like that.

Token comes to help me up anyways. "I think I sprained my ankle." I inform them. Clyde admits to feeling a bit bad about laughing now. Fuck him. I don't think I like that boy very much.

"There's a first-aid kit in the kitchen. The best I can do it wrap it and give you some ice."

"That's fine." I wasn't gonna even do that so this is great.

We all go back to the kitchen where I smell coffee, freshly made. Good shit too, I can tell. Token's got money, I expect no less from him. I will have mine black, thank you.

I down four pain killers, offered by the boy with the dreads, himself, with my coffee and then set myself in a bar stool at The Black's island in their kitchen. Bebe sits on my side and Craig sits on my other side. I hand him the cracked and bent spectacles. Token sets the bandage on the counter and Craig grabs it before I can.

Bebe winks at me and I just roll my eyes. Craig doesn't tell me where he wants me to put my ankle. Instead, he grabs my ankle and pulls it into his lap. I almost fall out of my seat, which, with the way he's holding my foot would have, most likely producted with me breaking my entire leg.

Ergo, Craig is a dick to injured people.

But he wraps my ankle pretty skillfully when I ask him about it he shrugs and says his sister used to be into track. That's all he says. He doesn't say she injured herself, but I guess it was implied. Token gives me ice. I hardly use it.

Clyde starts to go on about Kenny and I guess he's the one who got into a fight last night but I'm only half listening because for the first part of the story my head hurt and for the second part the drugs finally started kicking in and Bebe started to pick at my hair and it felt nice. I started drifting off.

Craig would only tell me if he knew (about this morning) if we were alone and we're not. That's probably why he hasn't said anything to me at all. Or maybe he hates me but we're pushing that thought back.

Since Bebe is here I could get a ride from her and then I'd never have to hear if he knows about this morning or not. I open my eyes for another sip of coffee. I hate drinking, I hate parties and people. Why did I even agree to this?

Oh, yeah, I think I wanted to make out with Craig. I did, but I can't remember so that was pointless. I should try to do it sober. I got that one kiss this morning but that doesn't really count as sober because it was the morning after and I'm not sure how much we smoked but it hasn't exactly worn off and also I have a hangover.

I'd have to be really sober. Like a whole day sober. But that'd never happen. I'm never really not high. I'd have a panic attack. I don't love those things so I do what I can to prevent them Plus, .I only kiss him because I'm high and I have that kind of aloof attitude. Also, I have something I can blame. I was high so it doesn't count. I wasn't in the right state of mind.

But that's all bullshit and everyone knows it.

"I'm gonna go soon. Tweek, you coming with me?" The noirettes words are delayed and when I look at him, he's shiny. Like blurry, but kind of like there's light surrounding him.

"Yeah." I say before I can remember that I was supposed to be leaving with Bebe, for some reason. I should have a shot before I go. For the road. Since, it is Saturday and after Craig drops me off I'll be all by myself.

If I'm a little tipsy I could paint something crazy. I like painting while I'm fucked up. Tipsy is even better because I can actually do stuff right and possibly make something good. "Let's go now. I wanna paint." He nods and stands. "Wait." I grab a stray bottle on the counter. "Alright." I follow him without looking at the other kids because I don't want to see them judging me.

It's fucking cold outside. Like serious snow and wind and it sucks. My face is frozen. In Craig's car I quickly shut all surrounding vents before he can turn the car on. I'll open them when it warms up. "Sorry about sitting on your glasses." I say before opening the bottle in my hands and tipping it back, spilling the contents into my open and awaiting mouth. I swallow and cringe. Gross.

"You should slow down." Craig says.

"Yeah, I know. I try but I'm just a clumsy person so it doesn't matter if I'm standing still, I still fall a lot."

"No," He says, "I meant with the..." Craig trails off, gesturing towards my bottle but I could've understood without his hand.

I scratch my ear. I know. I know I should stop completely but, I just can't. He wouldn't understand, he should just mind his own business. He should stop pretending like he cares actually. "I'm just- I guess I don't know you so whatever." He ends with.

I'd like to pretend the conversation never happened.

But Craig continues to speak, "You're not supposed to drink after you take pills, you know?"

"I've done it so many times. That's a myth and my liver is steel." He nods like that makes sense, when really I don't think it did but, okay. "What happen to breakfast? I was looking forward to that."

"I can cook at your house. I wasn't expecting all those people to still be there."

My brows furrow, "You mean Bebe?" Because he knew I was here and he knew Token was there and I assume he knew Clyde would be too. Bebe was the only odd one he'd not know about. "You don't like her or something?"

He shrugs, "It's not her. I just didn't feel like it any more. But I'll cook for you." That's sweet, I guess.

"Why?" I ask, skeptically. Craig isn't sweet. He's kind of a dick.

"Because you want me to." He says, simply. "And I said I would so I will."

As incredulous as it is, I will accept this offer just because of how hungry I am. And I hope Craig is as good a cook as he says he is. That would make me happy. I know I already said I'd keep him but he'd definitely be over more often. Not like we haven't been together the past three days with few to one break over the duration. "Okay."

"You're complying." He points out, obnoxiously. I don't respond because this type of behaviour will always be ignored. "It's good. Maybe you're starting to trust me."

"OR," I say, "maybe I'm just hungry." Craig doesn't look dejected, just considers this and nods. "Probably the latter." I decide for him. "Because I find you being nice very suspicious and-"

"Like you, this morning." He cuts me off. I stare at him, stammering because I can't recall how I wanted to respond to him had he brought that up. I feel like I had it all figured out to make it look like it wasn't what it was but now I fucked it up. Damn whiskey. Craig snickers at me. Damn asshole. "It's okay, Tweek. I understand." What?! That's all he says. How do I know he understands, as in he actually does or he think he does and doesn't?!

"You d-_ngg_\- do?"

He hums, "mhm."

"W-what d-"

He interrupts me once again, "We slept in the same bed, Tweek." He says. I still stare blankly so he adds, "You're a cuddler, remember?"

I scream and cover my face, "Oh, Christ-fuck!"

Craig chuckles, "It's okay. It happens. I just love your reaction."

"Why?!" He raises an eyebrow at my outburst. "Why are you being so nice about it?" I ask. Sometimes the easiest thing to do is just speak because holding everything in all the time is overwhelming.

"I thought it was cute." He admits.

My eyes go wide, "Me having a boner is _cute_?!"

"No, dumbass, I meant your reaction!" He snaps. I'm quiet. I'm dying. Not really but that's actually unfortunate because right now I really wish I were just dead. "Calm down. I said I didn't care."

"I'm so embarrassed." I mutter into my palms, miserably. Now it's not even negotiable. Craig is mine. I have to keep him forever, because if he tells anyone anything I'm gonna have to move and maybe change my name.

"It's just morning wood. You're a guy." He says, not even taking his eyes from the road. And how does that make me feel better? I'm not sure but it does. Because he's making it not a big deal. Maybe it really isn't. He said it wasn't so it isn't. I'm a guy. A lot of people forget that because I'm gay and not very manly.

And he acknowledged it.

I calm down slightly but still decide to guzzle down some more whiskey, just in case. Plus, I'm really starting to see this painting. Something like oranges but neon colors. They're all cut open and it's looking at the inside of them. Something like that.

Craig pulls into my driveway and we rush into my home. Luckily my heat automatically turns on during this time of the year so it's warm already. "We probably have coffee. And bacon." I tell him. I don't think we're in stock right now, considering this is day three of my parent's absence. Food hasn't ever been a probably when they leave though, but that's because it's only me eating and now there's two teenage boys. Not to mention, we both had the munchies.

Craig heads over to the fridge, "Do you have eggs?"

"Yeah."

"And cheese?"

I nod, "I think so."

"Good. Then we'll have omlets. How's your ankle?"

I look down at the joint. "Pretty swollen." I analyze. "Hurts a little bit, I guess." He starts to pull things out of the fridge. I decide to help him by getting the pan and utensils, that he wouldn't know where to find. He does not thank me.

He opens the freezer. I'm not sure what he'd need from there. Craig pulls out some frozen vegetables and now I'm really confused. Is he gonna put those in the omlet? Maybe he's not such a good cook. "Put these on it. You should sit down."

"I wanted to paint." I say, dumbly.

"Then paint sitting down." He turns on the stove. What an ass. I start towards the stairs. He notices me and says, "I'll get them for you."

"I can do it." I assure him.

He's already next to me. "No, I'll do it."

I sigh, "You don't even know what I need."

"You fell down the stairs with two good feet, how can I trust you won't fall with a sprained ankle and just hurt yourself more?"

"Why are you _so _concerned about my well being?"

"Because, I-" He stops, abruptly. "I just am. Why do you care so much about me caring so much?"

Fucking idiot. "Because, no one _ever_ cares about me!" Fuck. I shouldn't have said that. I should have just let it go. God. It's that way that he gets me to just tell him everything. Maybe I'm just that kind of person, but no one ever asks. Kenny knows everything already so he's not a good comparison.

When Craig's quiet for several more minutes I turn and storm up the stairs. Not effectively, thanks to my ankle. I just look stupid.

It's not until I get to my room, I realize he followed me. "What does that mean?" His tone has changed. It's somewhat softer now. But just barely. I'm probably over obersvant.

"Exactly what it sounds like." Craig is an ass but he's not stupid. He stands there while I collect my paint, brushes, and paper. "What?!" I snap.

He steps back, "I don't know." He confesses. "Not even your parents?"

I shrug, "I told you their odd. I think they do their best but mostly they're in their own world. I mean, no parents in their right mind would just up and leave their child without any warning for weeks at a time and... kind of often. I think they leave for breaks, to relax or something. Maybe it's because they know I don't have anyone to come over anyways so they know I won't throw any crazy parties, but they know I'm high-strung! They know how paranoid I am. Why would they leave me like that?" I shake my head. "They're forgetful. I think they know I do drugs, they just don't know how to handle it so they pretend like they don't know instead of trying to help me. I don't know."

"You want help?"

I chuckle, bitterly. "Don't you think if could be happy without the use of drugs, that I would do that?" It's kind of miserable but he doesn't need to know the extent of my sadness. The fact that I told him this much shocks me, but not really since I know already that I'm keeping him. I might as well tell him. Plus, who is Craig gonna tell?

"I guess." He says.

I leave the room and we go back down stairs. I remember that Craig turned the stove on but he must've turned it off because the house is not on fire. "Any more questions?"

He shakes his head and continues to make the breakfast that is now going to be lunch.

oxoxoxo

I think my story made Craig sympathetic because he's still here. I don't have a problem with it. I don't really care. In fact, I enjoy the company. But how long can you be with someone before you start to hate each other?

Apparently three days and counting. I wonder what a fight with Craig would look like. He always looks mad but I've never actually seen him get angry, I've only just noticed. I think it'd be terrifying. But I also think it'd take a lot to get him to that point.

I popped in the movie he bought me, his request. And after turning off all the lights we retreated to the couch. I layed against one arm rest with my feet kicked up on the other side. Craig's on the other side basically nursing my injured foot in his lap. We had to replace the frozen vegetables with peas because they warmed up. I don't like it because it's making me colder than I typically already am, but it's soothing my sprain.

I've made it, somewhat a goal to be sober this whole time with Craig. It's a little late because I drank that whiskey but I don't think it's in effect anymore. I think it was the alcohol and tint of high from last night that dulled the pain of my ankle because half way through the movie it really starts to hurt. I try not to annoy Craig but it's causing me so much pain and discomfort. I start to move, I shift my foot around and even start to sit up.

Craig pauses the movie. "It's bothering you?" I shake my head. "Why lie? Just tell me that it is. What if I can help?" I avert my eyes. "I already said that I care so just let me help you. I'm not gonna turn out to be a dick." I scoff. He raises an eyebrow. "Okay, whatever, you know what I mean."

"How could you help? It hurts, I already took pain relievers, I don't wanna get high, and you're not a doctor."

After some consideration Craig says, "I can't get rid of the pain, but if it's bothering you I could take your mind off it."

"And how would you-" I almost choke and die. "Are you trying to imply..." I trail off. What if I'm wrong? And saying it would make me look like I want to kiss him. "What do you mean?"

"Stop playing stupid." He sets my leg aside, gently. Craig moves up the couch, crawling over my body. His face meets mine and my heart starts to race. Slowly, our bodies start to cordinate. My hands reach up and wrap around his neck and the hand his isn't using to hold himself up is gliding down my waist. It lands firmly on my hip.

The kiss isn't how I imagined all our other kisses played out but it's possible I just made up how all the other ones went because I couldn't remember them. This kiss is smooth and placid. But it's so heavy.

His lips wrap around mine. His shifts and something falls off the couch. Neither of us care. I abandon his neck when I realize how amazing his hair is. They just short soft tussle of pure bliss. My fingers run through them forward, backwards, and I even tangle my digits into them. I give a tug.

Craig presses against me harder. His lips come off of mine. "Again." He trails light wet kisses down my chin, neck, and stops at my collarbone. He has to pull my shirt down a little bit to reach the clavicle.

My breath hitches when he starts to suck at the skin. He sucks, harshly, then laps at the tender mark left behind. I adhere to his wish and give another tug to his locks. He makes a deep noise in the back of his throat. Something like a growl that sets me on fire. What was that? Has that happened before?

I feel something warm enter my shirt and Craig's hand starts to travel up my stomach. It brushes over my navel and comes to my chest. His thumb brushes against my nipple and I can't hold in my groan.

Craig sits up and maneuvers my shirt up. I move with him so he can get it over my head. Once the obstacle is out of the way he's back at my collar with his mouth and his hand plays with the projection of sensitive flesh protruding from my chest.

The sound of the front door opening brings us both to a halt. I'm on my back on the couch so I can't see who entered but Craig is on his knees sitting up and seems to me to be staring directly at the intruder. But he doesn't speak.

We're being robbed.

"Um, Richard, I think I may have forgotten my keys in the hotel. We have to go back." Scratch that. My parents came home early. That never happens. But, of course, it would when I actually have a boy over and am making out with him on the couch, also something I never do. The door shuts and I hear a car start. A car that I didn't hear pull up or shut off.

Craig looks down at me with a blank expression. "Holy shit, man." And I just start laughing. He cracks a smile and says, "You're ankle doesn't hurt anymore, does it?"

And I'm sad it's over.

* * *

_Hello Mama Tweak, making an appearance in the worst of ways XD I love this story so I post sooner. Review and tell me what ju think, leave suggestions, start wars, whatever tickles your pickle. I love reading your responses. _


	5. Bitter

_Lovebug- Jonas Brothers._

* * *

"Morning, baby, it's time to wake up." I let out a deep breath and roll over but the voice keeps coming and a hand starts to slide up my abdominal. "C'mon, I made you coffee."

My eyes open and I shriek, "Kenny, what the fuck?!" The blonde snickers and I groan. "Why are you here?" He's straddling me on my bed.

He pecks my lips, "We haven't talked in a while so I decided to pay my most beloved friend a visit and play catch up." He readjusts so I can sit up and stretch but refuses to just get off of me completel.y "What's new?"

"Nothing." I grumble, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. At least he made coffee.

"Well, this is new." He bounces atop my lap, administering pressure agaisnt my morning-boner. A regular thing now. I half moan, half yelp. He smirks.

"Kenny, no..."

He raises an eyebrow but shrugs, "Anyway, I hooked up with Butters."

My eyes shoot open and I stare at him, "Are you serious?"

He nods, enthusiastically. "It happened at Toke's party the other night. It was pretty fucking great. Being someone's first is always such a nice feeling." He groans, "It's so nice. He was really tight and just, perfectly adorably cute." He then adds, "Kind of like you were."

"Fuck you." I shove him off of me.

"Don't worry, Tweek, you're still number one. Plus, I had my time with Butters, now I'm all yours again. I'm sorry for my infidelity." He kisses my cheek and winks.

I roll my head back to crack my neck but when I come back to face Kenny his hands grab my head and tilt it back again. "Whoa, what the hell?!"

Oh yeah.

"_'Nothing new'_?" He asks. I feel him trace over my marks. He goes from my collarbone, to my neck, and right under my chin. My eyes flutter shut and let out a small breath. "Who did this?" He asks, not particularly mad, just curious, I think. Kenny wouldn't get mad over something like this because our relationship isn't something serious to either of us.. That's why I don't care he fucked Butters- I do care, just not for those reasons.

I shrug, "I can't believe you did that to Butters. You know how he is." I should've talked to Kenny myself, instead of relying on someone else. I never do that. Fuck, man. "He probably thinks you two are dating."

"I made sure he knew." Kenny promises. "Plus, I kinda made it seem like we were both drunk."

My eyes narrow for a moment, "Did you do that our first time?"

He blinks, "No." When I don't look convinced he pouts, "I didn't! You're actually my friend, Tweek. Butters isn't. He was a one time thing, probably... He's really good at giving head, somehow."

"You need to leave that boy alone."

His smirk returns, "Whatcha gonna do about it?" His head dips and I feel his tongue press against one of my bruises. I breath in sharply. After soaking the mark in saliva, the blonde blows cool air onto it. I purr, deciding I don't really care enough to stop him when this feels so nice and I haven't had release in a while.

Kenny's lips press meet my heating skin of my chest and he places kisses along my collar moving down to chest. He takes one of my nipples in his mouth and begins to sucks, gingerly. I writhe under him, my breath getting choppy. My chest is my sensitive area. Kenny would know this. One of his hands rests on my other breasts. His other hand is placed right on the hem of my flannel pants, two fingers slip under the waist band and tug ever so slightly.

"I wonder what this guy'll think when he sees this." I glance down to see that Kenny has strategically placed a hicky on nipple to see if he can rile a reaction out of 'whoever' left the hickys. This annoys me because I know its not because he cares but because he's bored and if 'the other person' does care, he hopes I'll tell him about it afterwards. Bastard.

The rest of Kenny's fingers slide into my pants. He sits up to pull them down to mid-thigh. He lens back into my chest. He kisses a path down my stomach, stopping every third kiss to leave a small blemish. He stops right below my belly button at a hicky he just made and bites. The closer he gets to my groin, the more anxious I get. He nibbles at the flesh and sucks and I'm sure he's leaving another mark for Craig. I'm not sure how Craig's gonna respond but I am curious to see his reaction. If he even has one. So I let Kenny make his mark or whatever. Not to mention Kenny is a god at hickys.

I moan as he drags his tongue the rest of the way down to my boxers. He doesn't stop there though. His tongue flicks over my bulge. I squirm and sigh. "Ken,"

"Mmm..." He hums, gripping my base through the boxers, while also taking the tip in his mouth, also through the boxers. I can feel his tongue slide swirls around me and I bite my knuckles. Kenny stops to take my hand from my mouth. "Uh, uh," he says. He goes back to what he was doing and I let out a loud moan. "Music to my ears." He muses, coming back up on his knees so he can finally tug my boxers down.

I gasp when he takes the head of my dick in his mouth and starts sucking while jacking me off. "Ken," I grab his hair. It doesn't compare to Craig's. He takes my response as encouragement and his head starts to bob as he takes me deeper in his mouth. Its hot and wet around me and he continues to suck. His lips are wrapped around me so tight and his tongue is presses against me, rubbing around my tip and down my base. "I c- can't..."

"Don't."

"I'm gonna come." I pant.

Kenny's mouth comes off of me but his hand pumps faster. "No one's asking you to hold back." I come into Kenny's hand with a shudder and a content sigh. He reaches to my desk and grabs a tissue. After he cleans himself off he snuggles my chest. "Feel better?"

I nod, catching my breath. "You said you made coffee?"

* * *

Forty minutes later Kenny and I are sitting in a diner. He offered because we also hadn't gone out in a while. Kenny makes a lot of money from selling drugs so I don't feel bad about letting him pay for breakfast. Or rather brunch.

"So, what's the deal with this guy?" Kenny asks, stuffing his face with pancake but still talking with the food in his mouth. "Are you two serious?"

"No, no, no. I don't know what we are." I admit. "It kind of feels like a joke."

"Do you like him?"

I shrug, "He's my type. He's smart. I like him but I just don't like him. Plus, he's kind of an asshole."

Kenny's eyes grow, "No fucking way!" Oh fuck I forgot how good Kenny's intuition is. "Craig?" He grins, hugely. "Dude, what?!" I pinch the bridge of my nose. Kenny starts laughing likes it's the funniest thing in the world. "He's gay? I should've fucking known. Asexual, my ass."

"Kenny, he's not gay. It's complicated."

"How far have you gone?"

I groan, "Just making out. But _he isn't gay_, Ken."

Kenny nods, "Fine." He continues to eat. Outside the window I see another familiar blonde. She squeals upon seeing us and rushes inside and to our table.

Bebe squeezes in next to me and smiles, "Hey, girl," she says. "So, you and Craig. What happened after you two left?"

Kenny answers for me, "Check out his neck."

Bebe gasps, yanking the collar of my sweater, choking me in the process. "Oh, my God, Tweek." She tilts my head. "Are you sure this isn't a serious thing. I mean, that you don't want it to be."

"Bebe, you can't tell me that you haven't had someone you sleep with but don't date." Her eyes flick to Kenny and I nod, "That's what I thought."

"You slept with him?!" She suddenly exclaims. The restaurant hushes to a silence. Everyone is staring at us.

I press my palm to my forehead, "No, Bebe, I haven't." I assure her, through gritted teeth. "I was just making a point."

"Oh." She giggles.

"Yeah, okay, well, I'm gonna go." I motion Bebe out of the booth. I'm fed up with being interrogated about the Craig thing.

"Good job, Bebe. You ruined our date." Kenny says to the girl scooting out in front of me. She pouts. "I'll see you later, Tweek." He waves to me as I stand.

I nod, "Bye, Ken. Bye, Bebe." I walk out into the street. A gust of cold air his my face and I flinch. This sucks. I pull my hoodie up and and wrap my scarf around the bottom portion of my face. It's not a long walk home, but walking anywhere in this weather if torturous. I consider stopping for coffee since Harbuck's is on the way home. Even though I did just have two at the diner and one before we left. This one would be more to warm me up though.

A loud horn honks behind me and I scream. My primary reaction is to run but the sidewalks are caked in snow. The parts that aren't are slick with ice. Unfortunate for me because that, along with my sprained ankle equals me slipping and falling flat on my face.

It hurts like a bitch. I can't even move. I can't even say anything. I just lay there and not to wallow in self pity. Because I'm seriously fucking hurting. This is worse than the ankle, I think. I know I cut my cheek. I know its probably stuck to the ice so it'll hurt when I pull my face from the ground. Everything is so cold and painful, I can't identify where I'm probably wounded.

Who the fuck would...?

A car door slams shut, I hear running footsteps, and then I see some black boots next to my face. Of course, it's this fuck. "Tweek, are you okay?" Craig asks, with, I'm sure, the most concern he can muster. I just groan and roll over. "Oh God." Craig mumbles. I wonder if m face is really that bad. "Here..." He squats down and I feel his hands shove under me. One under my back and the other under my knees and then he's hoisting me up, bridal style. I just blink at the bottom of his face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just wanted to give you a ride."

I reach for my face and when I lift my hand it's completely red. My breathing hitches. Blood. And it's coming from my face. "Oh, my-" I put my hands on Craig's chest to stop him, push him away so he drops me somewhat and then with what little time I have I move away from him and throw up. There's blood dripping into my puke. I feel light headed. I touch my face again and start to stumble. "I'm g- gonna- ngg-" I fall backwards but am luckily caught.

Next thing I know I'm in the back of Craig's car on my stomach with a towel stuffed under my head. He's driving and he's on the phone. Considering I'm still bleeding and very faint, I just listen and don't speak. "Yeah, Toke, I know!" Craig sounds frustrated. I hear Token respond but I can't hear clear enough to know what he said. "I'm bringing him to my place. It's not bad, it's just a lot of blood. I checked." Token says something. "I'm not stupid." Token speaks. "Fuck you." Token speaks. Craig says, "Thanks, man, I'll see you later." Token speaks. "Yeah, I'll see you then." He hangs up and glances back at me. "You good?" He scoffs, "Of course you're not." He turns back to the road. You just got a cut on your head. It's not that bad. We're going to my place. I'll fix it there. Try not to vomit in my car. Thanks."

"You know, you're an ass right?"

"Yeah," Craig answers, "I got that." After some silence he says, "I really didn't mean for that to happen. I didn't even hold the horn I only tapped it. I know I already said it but I'm sorry." He glances back at a red light. I just stare at him. He turns back to the road.

Craig seems different today. It's a little bit comforting but at the same time off-putting. Son enough we're in his drive way and he's opening the door for me. "Can you stand?"

"Yes, but I don't want to."

Craig rolls his eyes but guess who gets a piggy back anyway? He struggles when we get to the front door but manages. Once we're inside he walks to a closet, me still on his back and grabs a first aid kit. He drops me on the couch and I look around while he pull out supplies. "I'm gonna get a rag." He leaves. His house is darker shades than mine and feels Homier. Mine is styled like a cozy home but it seems so commercial to me but Craig's house has bills and mail on the dining table and new papers littering the coffee table. Things aren't in specific place or are in place that they shouldn't. There are dirty dishes in the sink. The trash can is filled to the brim and it doesn't seem like anyone is planning on taking it out.

But it's not dirty. Its home-y. And I already feel comfortable here. Craig returns with a damp rag and kneels in front of me. He works at wiping away the dry blood. I try not to think about it which is difficult until I instead just focus on his face. His eyes are lighter again. Like almost transparent, tinted blue. His pupils are small again too. The tip of his nose is tinted red from just being in the cold, as are his cheeks. His hat has been discarded and his hair shows that he was wearing a hat due to it's messy state. His sideburns come down into the tiniest hint of stubble forming down the sides of his chin.

I don't realise he's finished until my eyes hike back up his face to his eyes which are staring at me intently. I yelp and blush. He smiles and it makes me twitch because it looks real. He's really handsome. He has a nice smile. But I don't think I've ever seen Craig smile. Legitimately smile, a least. I accidentally glance at his lips. My blush deepens.

Craig grabs the rubbing alcohol and a cotton ball. He tilts the bottle and gets a little on it. "It's gonna sting." He warns but presses it against my forehead anyway. I hiss but the pain is brief, considering. He dabs my cheek and that stings so I must have a cut there too.

When Craig's finished he fishes through the kit and pulls out a large band aid. He peels off the paper and applies it to my face. He smoothed the bandage out on my skin and I watch his face again. His hand falls to my cheek once he's done and his thumb strokes my cheek. I have no idea what he's doing but he's looking at me again.

His lips press against mine. My eyes shut and I retaliate immediately but it's over just as quick as it started and when I open my eyes again. He's standing and putting away the kit.

I don't know what we're doing but I'm starting to not like it. "Are you g- gonna- ngg- take me home now?"

Craig shrugs, "We're here. You might as well stay, right? Plus, I think we should actually start our project." This is a valid point. If we're actually working I think I can do this. This project thing has been giving me anxiety anyway

For the next half hour Craig and I work on the project in his room, which turns out to be very dull, compared to mine, anyway. His carpet's beige and his walls are white. His bed is big and takes up a majority of the space. In a corner is a bookshelf, next to that is a desk with a computer, and then next to that is his guinea pig cages. His TV is on the wall and he has a small entertainment center consisting of an Xbox 360 and a gamecube. Around it is a fence-like thing. I assume it's for his guinea pigs.

I'm not sure what exactly happened. I was on Craig's bed working on the worksheet part of the project, while Craig was on the computer, next thing I know we're both on the floor making out.

Don't even ask.

... I KNOW! I said what I said and yet here I am, macking on his face. And I can't even care. How did we get on the floor? He rolls us over so he's on top and is attacking my neck. My fingers find their way to his hair. I breath heavily, just enjoying the feeling of his mouth on such a sensitive part of my body. I feel his hand run up my shirt, lifting it in the process. He stops to pull it off of me.

Once the article is off, Craig tosses it aside. He stops though. His brow furrows as he stares at my chest. "What the hell." I don't say anything. I know what he's looking at. "Who did this?" He draws around the mark with his thumb.

"Um, Kenny did."

Craig makes a noise and shifts off of me. "Gross." He sits back at his desk.

I whine. "What?"

"Yeah," He says. "That's disgusting, Tweek." He tells me, shaking his head. He sighs, "I'll kiss you when the marks go away."

That means that I also can't get anymore. I whine again. "What the fuck? I can just take a shower."

"The mark won't go away with a shower."

"You left marks and Kenny didn't care!"

"Kenny's a whore."

I grumble, sitting up. I don't even want to do the project at this point but I know Craig's serious. He cares though. Doesn't that prove it? But he made it seem like he only cared because it was Kenny. Or maybe he'd care if it were anyone. "Is it because it's Kenny?" He doesn't answer. "Or it can't be anyone else except you? Because that's super selfish. I have needs."

"Then that's fine. Make out with Kenny and don't make out with me." He says.

He's right. That's an option. But I don't wanna stop! Oh, God, what is this? I let out a deep breath. "Fine, I'll stop Kenny next time he sneaks into my house and starts making out with me while I'm sleeping."

"Good." Craig says, contently, typing away. "I'm going to Toke's tonight to sleep over. You should come."

"To sleep over?" Craig nods. "Can I do that?"

"I just asked you so yeah."

I shrug, "I don't know. Token and I aren't friends like that."

"Toke likes you though. And so do I so just come with me." He doesn't turn from the computer once.

My heart skips and I grab my chest. What the fuck was that? I bite my lip. "My parents... I don't know when they're gonna... be coming home. I should-"

"If you don't wanna come just say so."

"I do!" I blurt out. "I'll g- go..." My face heats up. "I'll go with you."

"Good."

Craig said he likes me... And I think I like him too.

* * *

_Sorry for the shorter chapter. Cheers to Tweek busting his ass for the second time this story. Also, HELLO Kenny. Woop woop._


	6. Secrets

"We can finish later." Craig says. I give him a skeptical look. "We're practically done." He defends. "Plus, we have plenty of time."

"Sounds like the words of a procrastinator."

He shrugs, "I'll pack some clothes for you." He stands and I follow him.

"Why don't we just stop at my place again."

After tossing a bunch of clothes in a bag he looks at me, "Oh, you have gas money?" I blink at him. "Right." He searches the room with his eyes. "I think I have everything so let's go."

Walking back down the stairs hurts my ankle and I notice something for the first time. The house is empty. "Where is everybody?" I check out the framed family potraits on the walls above the fire place. Only Craig's mother is smiling in any of them. There's a picture of Craig as a kid, flipping off the camera. One with him and his sister playing video games. They look like they're having fun. It seems to me the only reason the moment was captured was because they're unaware the picture's even being taken.

Craig's mom is so pretty. She has blonde hair and green eyes, that are possibly better than his but it's obvious they take some part in making his. She has a really nice smile. Ruby looks just like her. Craig's dad is, in my definition a lumberjack. He's probably six-foot-impossible and super freaking buff. He could literally snap me in half. He's ginger and balding. Ruby's hair is almost a mixture of both of her parents. I wonder how Craig ended up with black hair. He does have some of his parents features though.

"We all kind of do our own thing." He tells me, slipping into his coat and handing me mine. I thank him, softly. "Dad's probably working. I guess Ruby went to Karen's or they're at the mall. Mom doesn't like being here alone so she probably went out because of that."

I nod. That makes sense. My mom's the same way except she'd never be home alone in the first place. Her and my dad are inseperable, now that I think about it. Man, I never noticed that before. I put my coat on and we head out to his car.

"What would you need from your house?"

I shrug, "Just clothes but you said you packed me stuff. I don't really need anything."

"Good, 'cause we aren't going there."

I roll my eyes. He was considering it or he wouldn't have brought it up at all. That's nice of him though. That he was actually gonna take me home if I needed it. What a sweetheart. "How often does Kenny just break into your house?"

His question surprises me. I shrug and get in he passenger side. Once he's in the car too I say, "Often. I guess." He nods. "Why do you ask?"

Instead of getting a bullshit Craig response of a shrug or just flat out not answering Craig says, "The way you put it sounded weird. But, that's McCormick."

"He doesn't break into my house, per se. He used to so I just told him where the key was hidden."

"How often do you guys..."

I slowly process his words and when I get what he's asking my face heats and my eyes widen, "What the hell?!"

"What?"

"What kind of fucked up question, man?" I cover my face. Craig doesn't seem concerned with his question at all. Like he has a right to know and he doesn't. "I don't fucking know, Craig! And we didn't have sex today."

"Today."

"Gah!- Shut up!" My hands shoot to my hair.

"No drugs." He points out.

"I'm not always drugged up."

He dismisses me. "You never answered the question." He points out.

"Occasionally." I tell him, bluntly. "Sometimes more than often. Lately, not so much. But that's because my parents have been home and he's been with Bebe."

"How do you feel about that?"

"I don't feel anything!" I snap. "Why are you so nosy?"

Craig shrugs, unaffected by my outburst. "Still getting to know you." He explains simply. "No need to get hostile." He says. "I just find it hard to believe you two sleep together and you don't like him."

"Why is it hard to believe? Kenny's an asshole just like you."

"I don't know. I see you two together and it just looks like you like him."

"What does that look like?"

"Like he makes you happy."

"Since when have you been watching me?" I ask.

Craig doesn't answer. "We're here." He tells me, driving up the Black's long driveway and parking the car. We get out and walk up to the door. Instead of knocking he just pushes open one of the double doors. He wonders about Kenny but does the same thing with Token. I guess he doesn't come in and make out with him though... For all I know, I mean.

When I shut the door behind us, Clyde's head pops out of the kitchen. He's got food in his mouth so he waves and mumbles a greeting. I wave and Craig says, "Hey, man,"

Clyde swallows down his food and enters the living room "Hey, man," He turns to me, "Dude, what happen to your face?"

I glance at Craig, who's staring off into space. "I f-fell."

"Damn," Clyde says, "You're super fucking clumsy."

"Thanks."

"You should try a sport. Might fix your reflexes or something." He takes a bite from his hot pocket.

"No," I shake my head. "I don't think that's a good idea at all. I'm okay but thanks."

He shrugs and turns to Craig. "Hey, so, about what we talked about..." This grabs Craig's attention and his eyes shoot to me. Clyde's follow. His brows furrow, "Are you-"

"Tweek, go tell Toke we're here." Craig abruptly says, cutting off Clyde.

I give them both a suspicious stare but turn to the stairs, regardless. At the top of the stairs I stop and wait. Clyde says, "Is this about Tweek? You can tell me, man."

Craig shushes him. "Tweek!" I scream. "Go. get. Token!"

I scream and run to the boys room. When I get inside I slam the door behind me, fall to the floor, and hug my knees. I'm not sure what that was about but, I'd really like to and if I don't figure it out I'm gonna die. I'm sure I can persuade Clyde easily though. Easier than Craig, at least. Unless Craig's next words were, 'No, Clyde, this has nothing to do with him.' But I feel like if that were the case he'd have said it instead of making sure I wasn't within hearing proximity. Craig didn't want me to hear whatever they were talking about. Doesn't that ultimately mean it was about me? Maybe I'm paranoid. I know I am but, maybe this is just me being that.

"Are you okay?" I pan up to a shirtless Token. His dreads are pulled into a ponytail and he's got a purple headband on. Man, if Craig has nice abs, Token's abs are fucking hot. I take a deep breath. "I'm gonna assume Craig's here then?" I nod, muted by his beauty.

"He t- told me to g- go upstairs so he could t- talk to Clyde."

"Oh," he says, knowingly.

"You know?" He looks at me. "You do!" I stumble to my feet. "They're talking about me, aren't they?" Token averts his eyes. "I knew it! What are they talking about?"

"Um..." Token starts to move away from me but I grab him and move him back. Nice biceps. But I don't comment on it. "Tweek, I'm really not at liberty to say. You know how Craig is. He'd kill me."

"Why?!" I twitch. "I have to know or I'm gonna go crazy!"

"Ask him, man. Maybe he'll tell you." I give Token a look. He shrugs, "I know but it's worth a shot."

"He might kill _me_, man."

Clyde peeks in the room. "Movies ready. I picked your favourite, Toke." He winks at the the boy next to me.

"Ew." He mumbles. We all head downstairs where Craig is on the couch with his own hot pocket and is watching previews. He glances at us but not at me and then he's back to the screen.

Because of his blatant ignorance I plop myself down right next to him. So close that I accidentally sit a bit on his thigh before moving away, bashfully. He gives a curious stare and I blush like crazy. I notice Clyde notice our interaction. He sits on Craig's left and Token sits next to me. "What are we watching?" I ask.

Craig answers with, "The Grudge, but the Japanese version." I tense. "What? You don't like scary movies? _Wow, that's a shock_."

"Okay, asshole, can you quite being an asshole."

"Sorry, it's in my nature." He says.

Clyde hops up to flick off the lights as the previews end and the actual movie starts. "No, no, wait, wait!" I start to cover my face.

Token pauses the screen. "If it's too much, Tweek, we can watch something else." He tells me.

"But, you guys wanna watch it..." He shrugs. "We can watch it. I just need some coffee." I tell them and stand. I head into the kitchen and start Token's awesome coffee maker. I lean against the counter as I wait for the water to heat. From the living room I hear the movie start, it's less scary when you don't understand what they're saying. I also hear some low murmuring. I can't make out what they're saying so I'm sure it's about earlier.

I creep to the door frame and listen. "I told you to stop fucking talking about it. We can talk about it any other fucking time. Why are we talking about it when he's right in the kitchen, probably pressed against that wall, right there, listening." Craig barks, quietly.

Clyde says, "You're the one who invited him. What did you think? We wouldn't talk about this? We have to."

"I regret saying anything at all." Craig admits. "Can't you just pretend I never told you."

"I'm glad you told us." Token says. "This is, kinda important. Its good to know you'll talk to us."

"It's not though. It's really not a big deal at all. You're making this so gay." Craig grumbles.

Clyde snickers, "Is _that _what's making this gay?"

"Clyde," Token groans.

From what I can tell, Craig told them we're making out or something. I pour myself some coffee, leaving it black and exit the kitchen. I sip my coffee, casually and I think they a believe it for the most part. I look as normal as Tweek could look, considering all his problems. I sit back in my seat and make myself comfortable between the two bigger boys that sit on either side of me.

The movie takes my mind off of everything but instead scares the shit out of me. I finish my coffee within minutes, which is good because with how I'm jumping I'd have spilled it everywhere. I grab Token mostly which is embarrassing and the times I grab Craig, I get more scared because I grabbed Craig.

Meanwhile, Clyde is dying with laughter in the corner and he makes me hate my life. Kenny starts texting me in the middle so I opt to start paying more attention to that. When I tell him this he makes the conversation interesting, doing everything he can to make me laugh. He even throws in some sexual stuff.

Little did I know, I had a C.O.S. Craig over the shoulder. I'm not sure if it was me texting during the movie, my occasional chuckles, that I was texting Kenny, or that Kenny sent a picture of half his dick. It was a picture of him pulling the front of his pants down but not all the way so I got a bit of his dick and his happy trail up to his belly button. It was a very tasteful picture. I saved it but Craig takes my phone and chucks it across the room.

I gasp. "What the fuck?!" I slap his shoulder.

"Try watching the movie." He says, not even looking at me.

"Try not PMS-ing all the goddamn time!" I snap back. He's so lucky I have a super case because I'm too clumsy not to. He'd have broken my phone.

"Ooooooh!" Clyde cheers. "Burn!"

"Okay, don't watch it. I don't fucking care but don't ruin it for the rest of us."

"You're the only one who cared!" I exclaim.

"The light in the corner of my eyes is bothering me." He says, his arms crossed over his chest. I groan. I don't even bother getting my phone. He wants to keep all these secrets but all _my _information is up for grabs. "Aw," Craig says in his asshole voice, "Don't pout, baby, I didn't mean it." He brushes my chin with his thumb.

"D- don't touch me. God, you're a jerk." I should have stayed home. I consider calling Kenny to come get me. He seems like a lot more fun right now. Man... That picture. I hate Kenny.

The rest of the movie sucks. I keep getting lost in the subtitles and even though I have no idea what's going on I get scared to death when _that thing _comes on the screen. I'm not gonna sleep tonight, though I never was anyways. But now the night's gonna be full of shit. I regret a lot of things.

It finally ends though and the lights come back on, thank God. Clyde goes to the kitchen to make us food. He decides on tacos and while we wait Token sets up sleeping bags in the living room. "My parents are coming back tomorrow." I don't know if my parents are every coming back after what my mom saw. Craig and I haven't discussed that. I don't know that he cares.

Token eventually leaves to take a shower but he gives me a look before he goes to let me know that he's giving me an opportunity. So once he's out of the room I stare at my phone and say, "What were you guys talking about earlier? I know its about me. You made it obvious."

"None of your fucking business."

"Craig," I start but am immediately shut down.

"Tweek, its none of your fucking business. Let it go because I'm not gonna tell you." He stands. "I'm taking a shower." He leaves upstairs.

I get an idea and head into the kitchen. Clyde's singing and cooking the meat. I snake up next to him. "Hey," I say. He hums an acknowledgement. "So, I wanna know what Craig told you about me. What do you want?"

Clyde considers. "Will you do my homework for the rest of the school year?"

"Dude, that's three months."

"Right." He says, smiling. "You wanna know?"

"How about a month, a pack of gum, and five bucks." I negotiate.

"Deal." He agrees. "He told us there was someone he might think is cute. That's you."

My brows furrow. "That's it?"

"That's kind of a big deal considering Craig's never found anyone attractive before."

"He thinks his sister's cute though, right?"

"Oh," Clyde says, "I guess."

"So what the fuck?"

Clyde shrugs, "If you don't get it then never mind." He finishes the meat. "Tell everybody the foods done."

"They're in the shower." I say. "Not together." I add. "And I'm not doing your work. That was lame. I thought it was something extreme."

He gasps, "Fucking liar. Then I'm tell him I told you!"

"Who'd that effect though?"

He shrugs, "Both of us probably."

"Don't do that." I start making my taco. He makes five and I make two. We go back into the living room and sit on the sleeping bags, spread out.

After a lot of silence Clyde says, "So," He looks at me with raised eyebrows, "you're gay."

I let out a deep sigh. "Craig said I was cute. What else did he tell you?"I'm wondering if Clyde knows that we made out.

"Why?" Clyde asks. "What do you know?"

This perplexes me because that's what I was gonna ask him. Now I don't think he's actually told me everything Craig's told him and also I don't think he knows about Craig and me. I say, "Oh, so you didn't tell me what he told you. Who's the fucking liar?" Clyde blinks at me and then starts stuffing taco down his throat. He doesn't gag once. He's sucked dick before, I bet. "Now, I'm not even giving you gum, ass-sack. Tell me what he-"

Clyde starts chocking and screaming something through the food in his mouth. Some flies out and hits me in the face. I am disgusted.

"Gross." Craig says behind me. I scream. He nods, "Great."He's wearing sweatpants now and a, 'The Killers' T shirt. His hair is wet and sticks to his face. He rubbing it with a towel. He looks good. I try to change my thought considering he won't be kissing me for a while.

When Clyde's done dying and chewing he repeats, "Tacos are done."

I stand. "I need to boil my face."

Token comes down the stairs next, shirtless again, I will add. I do not hide my interest. "What's up?"

"Clyde's repulsive." I state to the shirtless boy. Or more, to his abs.

"What's new?" Token walks to the kitchen.

"Care to stop drooling?" Craig asks me.

"No, not really." I shoot back. "Don't be jealous."

Craig scoffs, "Of _you_ and _Token_?"

"No," I say, "of Token because he has better abs than you."

And for the next ten minutes Craig doesn't talk to me. I think I really hurt his feelings. He and Token get food but when Token comes back out, he's also holding a bottle of, obviously alcohol. He says it's his own blend. "Sure to get you wasted in, like three swigs." Though, I'd prefer a cup. I announce this and grab one from the kitchen.

Now, we're all sitting on the sleeping bags in the middle of the living room with the lights dimmed. I grabbed everyone a cup because I was feeling particularly paranoid. But, now, not so much...

My cup is the first one empty but, still, I feel like I'm the most sober. I feel like Clyde might've poured himself more than everyone else. He starts to lean on Craig. Craig pushes him away. But after a few more shots the boy is leaning against the niorette again and this time he wraps his arms around him. He's mumbling things to Craig about what a great friend he is.

Token's still looking pretty solid. He's taken the role of pouring the shots because he's the only one who wouldn't spill it, I guess? Craig doesn't look very unstable, but because he's letting Clyde touch him, I'm gonna say he's not completely good. I don't know.

I feel fine.

When half the bottle is gone Clyde kisses Craig on the cheek. He caresses his mark and tells the boy he loves him. Craig simply hums, "Mhm." Which is equivalent to him saying it back and even reciprocates the hug the brunette's giving him.

Token's playing video games on the flat screen. "I think I should call Red." He suggests for the billionth time.

I shoot him down again with, "No, man, I don't think you should do that right now." Though, I'd love to see him drunk-dial the girl. I didn't know he was even interested in her. I should let her know.

Clyde and Craig tip over and now they're cuddling on the ground. My blood boils. The hugging alone was a little vexing but this shit right here is absolutely unacceptable. I crawl over to them and glare at Clyde. He's such a whore. "Go." I nudge the boys leg. I want to cuddle with Craig. It's not fair. "Move!" I push harder.

Clyde starts to whine and pout. "Why? No!" He protests. Craig doesn't do anything. He's currently staring at the cieling.

"Not fair." I explain. "You have a girlfriend. Imma call her. Go away."

Clyde groans like calling Bebe would end in their break up if I told her that he were cuddling with Craig. Seems true enough though. He rolls away from Craig and I curl up next to him instead. I start to stroke his hair. He seems to like that. But he swats me away.

"Asshole." I state.

"I told you no." He says. "Earlier." He adds.

I nod. I remember that. "My lips are no where near you." I point out. He shrugs. "You don't like it?"

"Of course I do."

"Oh." That didn't seem very Craig to say and I wonder if he means it. He could just be drunk. "I'm not drunk."

He snickers, "I'm sure."

"I'm not." I insist.

"Yeah, yeah,"

This is really nice. I like Token's house because it's big, spacy, and clean. And we can just get drunk together and not do anything. I could play video games with Token or do something stupid with Clyde, or I could just sit with Craig like this. I could do this forever. I think I'm not supposed to though. Because Craig's so cute. He's so smart. He's got nice hair. So soft. He smells really nice. Right now he smells like Token though, still nice. "I really like your friends." I say randomly.

"You mean all that?"

I snuggle into his chest more. "All what?" My voice is muffled by his shirt.

"Oh." He says. "Nevermind."

"What?" I repeat.

I lift my head from him. "Nothing. Drop it." Craig has a smile on his face. Like his mom's smile. His whole family should smile more. They've all got nice smiles. Everyone in the world has a nice smile!

Suddenly Clyde stumbles back over to us. "Craig?" His tone concerns me. Craig sits up, resulting in me sitting up as well. I could cry from my disappointment. The world's so cold without him.

"Yeah?" Craig asks.

Clyde starts crying. "I'm so sorry, man!" He throws himself at Craig who starts looking worried. "I didn't mean to. I just d-didn't want to do my homework."

That sounds familiar. What was that about?

"What are you talking about?" Craig asks. "Are you okay?" Man, Craig is _drunk._

"I t- told Tweek!" Clyde blubbers.

Craig gasps. "It was a secret!"

Token pauses his game. "You traitor! I would've helped you with your homework!" He spins around to glare at the boy in Craig's arms.

Clyde cries harder. "I'm so sorry..."

Craig starts to tear up too now. "I can't believe you betrayed me." He hugs the brunette and cries into his shoulder. "We were supposed to be friends. If I can't trust you, who _can _I trust?"

I watch them, glance at Token, glance back and start laughing. My laughter mixes with Clyde and Craig's cries and Token puts his controller down. He goes over to the boys and pulls them apart. "Clyde, you're an ass-fuck." He pushes the boy over. Clyde just falls and lays there. Token turns to Craig, "it's gonna be okay, Craig. Tweek, didn't care. If he did, he wouldn't still be here. He's a good friend and so is Clyde. He's just stupid. At least he didn't tell him everything right?" Craig blinks, tears staining his face. I snicker. "Right, Clyde?!" Token snaps.

"Yessir." Clyde slurs.

"Right, Tweek?"

"I knew it!" I say. Everyone ignores me.

"See?" Token says to the crying boy in front of him.

Craig wipes his face. "I guess..."

"See? Everything's good."

Craig nods and smiles, "You're right."

Token pats him on the shoulder and goes back to his game. Clyde gets up to get something for all of us to eat and I go back to Craig. "Why's it such a big deal."

"Don't talk to me about it._ It's serious_." He tells me sternly. "I don't trust myself right now."

I nod, "I think you're cute." I tell him. "That's not a big deal. I think Token's cute. None of it's a big deal."

Craig frowns. "Those fucking assholes." He grumbles. "What kind of friend just turns on their other friend like that over homework?!" He growls. I shrug. "The fact that I let it go is so unbelievable especially when I know he'd do something like this again!" He stands up really really fast. He almost comes back down. I would have caught him.

_I bet I would have._

Clyde comes out of the kitchen and sets the food down on the coffee table. Craig storms over to him and shoves his chest, roughly. "What the fuck is your problem, man?"

Clyde stumbles backs. "Whaaat?"

"You must be out of your fucking mind if you think you can just talk about my shit like that!" Craig's voice gets scary. I don't like it.

"Calm down! TOKEN! He's gonna get violent!" Clyde cries.

Token shoots up to grab Craig. "C'mon, it's okay. Calm down." He turns to me with an unhappy Token face. "Tweek, stop bothering Craig about it. Just let him forget."

"Jeez, my bad." I apologise.

Token lets Craig go. Craig sits back down. Clyde stays over on the couch but tosses us a bag of chips. "I'm tired." Craig says. "I'm upset. I really didn't want you to know."

I shrug, "it's fine. We all have opinions. You just have really good ones." He nods, slowly. "I'm gonna play with Token. You wanna play too?" He nods again.

"Wait, he told I said you were cute?" I nod and Craig laughs. "That bastard."

"You don't?"

He grins, "Of course I do." There's not an ounce of sarcasm in his voice. I swear there isn't.

* * *

An hour later were all sprawled out in or on our sleeping bags. I think everyone's sleeping but me. Which is usually how it is.

I wonder what Craig said that I don't know. Him thinking I'm cute seems to be a 'big deal' and I think in a good way too. The more I'm with him, the more I like him and that sucks. Especially when he's drunk. He's all over the place. It's so cute.

I hear someone shuffle and Clyde's soft snoring. The shuffling continues until I feel a hand touching my sleeping bag. I almost scream but another hand swiftly covers my mouth. "Chill." Craig whispers.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm cold." He tells me, like it was the most blatant thing in the world. "Move over a little." Instead of arguing, mostly because I'm worried about waking the other boys, I do what he says and move over a little bit.

I feel Craig slip in behind me and it's almost a tight fit but it's just snug instead. Honestly, I was cold too. He's pressed against my back and suddenly my hearts beating faster and my face heats up. Craig's arm slinging around me does it. I flip over to face him. I can just barely see his face inches from mine. I know what he said but what if I just kiss him and he doesn't have to kiss back?

I peck a quiet kiss to his chin. And then another at the start of his neck. He doesn't protest and when his head tilts so more of his neck is exposed, I couldn't hide my grin if I covered my whole face. I give him nice soft kisses all over his neck and under his chin and neck. He sighs lightly. My hands skim over his chest, under his shirt. "I'm not kissing you." He promises.

"Fine." I nip at his skin, gently at first and then harder to leave marks. I want people to ask him about me. He doesn't have to tell them but at least it might catch their attention and then he'll think of me.

"Tone it down." He whispers.

"Or what?" I say into his ear huskily.

"Things are gonna be really awkward." He replies. "Since Toke and Clyde are right there."

"i don't understand."

"Just go to bed."

"I can't!" I snap. "You wanted to watch 'The Grudge'." I tell him. "Now, you have to deal with me being awake."

"Then let's go out back and smoke." Craig suggests.

"It's freezing outside." I say.

"I'll hold you if you get cold." He promises. My heart flutters and my stomach turns.

I wasn't supposed to smoke but I wasn't supposed to drink and I did that. So Craig and I sneak out back through the kitchen, where he produces a pipe and a lighter and a small baggy.

How did I not smell that?

After we start smoking, we take a seat in the porch chairs and Craig starts to talk about his guinea pigs. It's really cute but I have a hard time following. I keep thinking about kissing him and how I can't. It driving me insane. I can kiss his neck and him not kiss back but I don't think he'd let me kiss his lips even if he doesn't kiss back.

"They're probably the only thing I actually love."

"What about your sister and mom?" I ask.

"Family doesn't count." He explains. I nod. It's so dark outside. Especially since Token lives on a hill away from town so there aren't any street lights up here. He has lights but they're all off right now. I'm starting to scare myself, looking at the woods like this.

"I'm cold." I announce.

Craig snorts, "You're a fuckin' liar." Partially. I'm cold but I want him because I'm mostly scared. Plus, him holding me would only make this better. Why not? There is no why not. Regardless, Craig pats his lap. I walk over to his chair and place myself comfortably in his lap.

It's better than when we were cuddling.

His arms are around me and his head burrows into my stomache. "You smell so weird."

Oh no. "I'm sorry..."

"No," He says, "It's a good weird." He assures me. "It's kind of like coffee. Definitely coffee, but then... pineapple? And sometimes weed. Like, _Kush_?"

I giggle, "That's my favorite." I dig my fingers into his hair. "You smell like boy and your house. But your house smells nice, I promise."

"Cool."

"Yeah..."

Craig says, "Hey, you think..." But he never finishes.

So I say, "Yeah?" But he just shakes his head. That bothers me because I swear what he was just about to say had everything to do with his secrets. If me being cute was only part of it, imagine what it actually could be? Unless they're all just drunk and spewing shit that doesn't make sense and it really had nothing to do with Craig's secret. What if the secret has nothing to do with me at all?

Craig seemed confused when he thought the secret was me being cute. So, maybe I completely missed the mark and Craig was happy that I didn't actually know. I rest my head on top of his. I don't wanna worry about the project or if Craig and I will talk after it. I just wanna be held by him at two in the morning on Token's back porch in the cold dark. My eyes stare at the sky.

I see a shooting star but my reflexes are too slow for me to alert Craig. By the time I could have, I decided it would be pointless. But I make a wish.

I wanna feel this forever.

* * *

_Sorry for mistakes if there are any... I wrote some of this on my phone and my phones set to UK. I don't live there and I'm not from there or anything, It was an accident that I never fixed, grew to love, and here we are. Anyway review and tell me what you think. I particularly like this chapter, I guess._


	7. Re-Introduction

Last night I fell asleep in Craig's arms on the porch. I'm not sure how and I don't even remember what we were talking about but I'm glad I got any sleep at all. Instead of having some terrible nightmare, I had a dream I abudcted by aliens but they were named after Token, Craig, and Clyde. They chose me as a human to explain our whole race to them. In reality I definitely would have had a panic attack and fucked it up for everyone but I sophisticatedly explained every imortant detail about humans and why we deserve life.

Token and Clyde totally agreed that we're substantial enough to keep but Craig had a hard time understanding our emotions. So I kissed him and then we got married. We had little alien babies too. They were genderless. Kenny showed up in space but he was just flying around asking me if I knew where he could get pie for his mother. It didn't make any sense.

When I did wake up I felt terrible. I was lightheaded, dizzy, and my head hurt. I shouldn't have done anything that I did last night. I mean the drinking and the smoking. I need to stop. I need to stop now! Why can't I get my shit together? Why does it even matter? Because I don't feel like I can live like that. I can't go through life high all the fucking time, man. I can hardly remember anything. But maybe that's how it needs to be. I started doing it for a reason. I did. I don't want to think about this.

I got a text from Kenny asking for a ride so I relayed this to Craig who seemed relunctant but agreed to for me. I kicked him in the shin. He grabbed me and dragged me to the bathroom. Only to seduce me and then not even actually kiss me, after inspecting my chest and declaring the marks still visible. I tried not to convey my disappointment but I uncontrollably went limp after his verdict so he'd catch me. He did and seemed pleased I was upset.

So, I kicked him again and ran away from the room.

Now, we're all in Craig's car driving to school. We already picked up Kenny. He's been pestering Craig the whole time he's been in the car. He's almost borderline telling the boy that he knows. Kenny's head pops from the backseat into the front, between Craig and Token. "Craig, how's your love life?" Kenny's question goes unanswered and Craig has to stop for a red light. He slams the breaks and Kenny flies back into his seat. "That bad, huh?" Craig ignores Kenny again. "What exactly does 'asexual' imply?" Craig says nothing to the blonde, who's once again peeking into the front half of the car.

"Kenny, what is your problem?" Token asks.

Kenny shrugs, "I'm just curious."

"If I'm kind enough to drive your broke-ass to school, shut the _fuck _up and accept the ride silently." Craig speaks for the first time. Kenny makes a displeased expression before slumping back in his seat. I'm unsympathetic. I don't like that Kenny's almost meddling in what Craig and I are doing. How is he supposed to figure it out when even _I _can't? And he's being an ass about it. I know he's not jealous so I'd just appreciate if he didn't try to fuck this up. I think I'm mostly just mad about him being the reason I can't kiss Craig. I could just get action from Kenny that didn't involve marking but Kenny's selfish and childish. He'd do it just because I needed him not to. And, in the moment, I'd let him.

At school, I'm start to panic because I realise I have no idea whether or not it's okay for me to stay with the Craig and Those Guys group. And to avoid an awkward situation and ultimately feeling uncomfortable, I just leave quickly. As soon as he's parked I'm on my way to the library. I could work on the project there. I faintly hear my named called. I swear it was Craig but could've been Kenny and that's more likely so I go with the latter. I pretend like I don't hear it and continue onward.

The library is considerably empty so I make my way to a table in the back where I can, essentially hide. I'm not sure what from but it's safe. I pull out a paper and start working. Let's be honest, I couldn't focus enough to do this shit. I don't want to do this shit either. It's way easier with Craig in the room, but at the same time that makes it difficult to focus too. Fuck, isn't that conflicting...?

The project is due Wednesday. After that there'll be no reason for Craig and I to talk and without that initial interaction why would we kiss either? Our kissing is somewhat a joke, isn't it? To him, at least? It would be just like his Thomas Situation if I cought feelings for him and told him so. He'd be fine with continuing our activities but he wouldn't harbor the same feelings and never would. That'd hurt worse, I think. But I don't even like Craig that much so ending things how they are now would be best, I think.

I also think the marks could still be here when Wednesday rolls around. Could it already be over? Wasn't this all his idea? I feel like he only made it seem like it was mine. But, I also can't really remember that night very well. Craig said we were friends, didn't he? At some point? Does that mean he'll make an effort to be around me even after we turn in our papers?

Someone sets books down on the table. I look up at them. Kyle sends me a half smile, his green eyes seem heavy behind his glasses. "Hey, Tweek," He greets me, sitting himself in the seat across me.

"Hey, K- Kyle."

"Are you doing the Geometry assignment?" I nod, tired of struggling with speech. "I got partnered with Cartman's ass. He made me do it. I don't care. If he did it, we'd have failed. Not because he's dumb. He's a fucking genius, but he'd never willing give me anything." The ginger tells me.

Kyle and I are not friends. But I like him to an extent. I don't like being alone either and for some reason Kyle is being nice to me right now. I guess I'm just traumatized from being in The Fantabulous Foursome. Together they suck but seperate they all contain some pretty badass qualities. Cartman being the exception. He is a genius though. Cartman is ridiculously smart, but equally as evil, homophobic, and racist. It kind of balances out. "Who's your partner?"

"Craig."

Kyle nods, knowingly. "Is it the same situation?"

I shake my head, frantically. "No, he's helping me with it and Craig's smart too."

"Oh." Kyle says, "Seems unlikely."

"I know right." We snicker, quietly. "He's not so bad, I've come to find out though."

"Really?"

"Yeah..." Thinking about Craig, Clyde, and Token has brought my mood back down. I would like to not talk about this anymore, I've decided. I change the subject. "I heard you g- got a job."

"Yeah," Kyle says, slowly. He noticed. But he won't say anything about it. Maybe he knows I don't want to talk about it. Kyle is smart too. I have a suspicion of him being gay too, though, I don't think he likes Stan if he is. Because I'm sure Stan isn't gay and Kyle knows better than that. Oh, my god, is that why he's talking to me? No way, if anything he's messing around with Kenny. OH SHIT. Why didn't I think of that sooner? I'll have to ask the blonde about it later. "At the Harbuck's, so I'm probably gonna start seeing you a lot, you think?"

I shrug, "I don't _love _Harbuck's. They're not real coffee but they're easy and I'm lazy."

An outburst behind me causes me to scream and grab my hair. "_FUCK-SHIT-COCK_!" Whoever _is _in the facility shushes us. Thomas is here. He sits at the table with us. "Hey, Tweek, Kyle." I twitch. Kyle greets the boy and I twitch again. Thomas gives me anxiety. Not only is he the epitome of everything that sucks- for me- he must feel the same way about me because he's rude to me too. I'm surprised he's here and sitting down.

"What are you doing here, Thomas? I don't usually see you in the library in the morning. You either, Tweek." Kyle says.

Thomas shrugs, "I don't know- _COCK SUCKER-_" I flinch. "Just chilling, didn't feel like being around a bunch of weirdos this morning. What about you?"

Kyle shrugs now and doesn't even bother to responde. That, to me, sounds like it's pretty crappy. Yeah, well, me too. Sucks. The bell rings. Kyle's first to grab his stuff. "You should swing by during one of my shifts, Tweek." He tells me. "You can come too, Thomas. I'll give you guys a discount."

I accidently blurt out, "Why?" Because, once again, Kyle is not my friend.

Kyle says, "You're, like one of the only people at this school who doesn't suck. Why not? You don't have to come. I'm just asking." Kyle starts off to his next class. That was nice of him to say.

Thomas stands and says, "We should-SHIT- ASS- FUCK-"

"GAH!"

"-hang out again." He finishes.

"Last time we hung out, T- Thomas, you t- told me I sucked." But, now I know that you're actually the one who 'sucks'. I'm not gonna actually say anything about that though. Thomas would rip me apart.

"Yeah," He says. "You're right." Thomas leaves me, clenching my fist and wishing I still took boxing. I consider getting back into it before, locking my fingers in my hair, slamming my face into the table and letting out a frustrated cry.

I head to class.

* * *

On my way to lunch someone yanks me back by my collar roughly, choking me. I start to freak out because it's been a while since I've been bullied, in a physical sense and I'm not sure I could handle it happening again. But, my breath returns when I turn around and face the perpetrator. I almost want to kick him again.  
Craig isn't wearing his hat anymore. He looks a hundred times better without it. I wish he'd wear it more often. He glares at me but I glare right back. I have no idea what he could be upset over, he's the one who just choked me! "You ran off this morning."

Is that it? "So _what_?" He stalks after me down the stairs.

"Why are you in such a bitchy mood?" He asks.

I scoff, "You just fucking choked me out. What wrong with _you_?" I counter.

When we make it to the bottom. I get lightheaded and start to stumble. "Whoa," Craig grabs my arm and doesn't let go until I balance out. "What was that?"

I shake my head until I'm stable. "I don't know. It's been happening all day."

"You think it has something to do with you falling so much lately?" He asks. I didn't, until he said that. Now, I think I know it's from how much I've hit my head as of late. Also, I shouldn't have hit my head on the table in the library. But I do it all the time so I didn't think it'd leave me with a pounded head, up until this point. "Should you see a doctor?"

"I'm fine." I shake my head, "I don't like doctors."

"Are you fine because you don't like doctors?"

I glance at the niorette but refuse to meet his eyes because I really don't want to go to Hell's Pass. Normal hospitals are bad enough, and I know South Park's isn't normal. It sucks. And the doctors and nurses are fucking crazy just like everyone in South Park. Fuck, and I'm supposed to trust them with my health? "We can stop by after school." Craig suggests.

My chest tightens. "I'd really rather not. I've taken worse falls and been fine, Craig. It's okay."

"I feel bad. It's my fault you fell in the first place." He says. "I just don't want you to be more hurt than you think and then you pass out walking up the stairs and fall again." He says. "I don't want something bad to happen to you." Craig stops talking when he notices me staring at him. "I'm rambling."

"You are." I agree. We're quiet. Now it's awkward... Maybe Craig does plan on keeping contact after this project thing.

"Well, I'm taking you to Hell's Pass after school anyway." He says. "Just to make sure." Before I can respond he continues, "Anyway, you wanna sit with-"

"Hey, girl!" Bebe grabs my shoulders from behind. I cry out, startled. She's grinning like a cheshire cat so I'm thinking she did it on purpose. Bebe's hair's pulled back braided down the back of her head today and her makeup is neutral.

"Bebe, h-"

The girl grabs my hands. "You have to sit with us at lunch and tell us all about M.M." Her eyes dart to Craig and then back to me so I'd know she meant him without him knowing. But, oh, my God, I hope I'm being paranoid when I think that looked totally fucking obvious. At least she didn't use her real code-name: Mister Mistery because then he'd really fucking know. What would I talk to them about? Yeah, a lot happened but I'd like to keep it to myself. If I told all the girls at that table, it'd probably be around school by noon.

I stammer in front of her and her face turns to one of deject. "No way, you're not gonna spill?" I continue to sputter nonsense, trying to collect my thoughts into words and communicate them to Bebe. "That's bullshit."

I glance at Craig and pull Bebe away from him. "I don't want it to get out about Craig and I. And it really isn't that serious Bebe. We aren't together or anything close, I promise." I assure her. "After the project, I doubt we'll even talk that much either."

She blinks at me slowly. "Are you joking, Tweek? You've got him in the palm of your hand and you aren't. _even_. trying!" She tells me. "Imagine if you were! Just a little more effort, maybe a little more moosse- don't think I haven't noticed you aren't using it today- and he'd be wrapped around your finger! WE ARE BLONDES, Tweek. _Blondes_, okay? This is what we live for."

"Wh- What are you even t- talking about?"

"No, no," She waves a finger in my face. "Don't go soft on me. You are powerful, Tweek. Look at him." We both briefly look back at the niorette. He catches us and I yelp. Bebe grabs my chin and yanks my face back towards hers. "If you want it. You can have it, Tweek. I'm just being honest with you. I know you have, like self estem problems or _whatever_, but I'm gonna give you all those jeans I brought over the other day and then on Wednesday we are going shopping, okay?" She nods. "And then you're gonna go to his house and get yourself some ass."

She lets me go, mumbling. "Not gonna talk after the project..." She scoffs. "You can go sit with Mister Mistery today and you don't have to tell the other girls- my lips are sealed, but don't think I won't be watching and making sure you don't fuck this up. I got your back, girl and I know you want him." She lets out a deep breath. "'Kay, catch ya later!" She smiles and walks off to Wendy who just exits a nearby hall. I watch her walk off, gapping.

If I'm not lying to myself, Craig is really attractive and absolutely my type. He's taller than me, has dark hair, and blue eyes. He's also a pretty chill guy and that's good for me because I am a spazz. He doesn't care about anything so he doesn't care about all my flaws that are a lot so many prefer to not be around me because of them, and I think he has sleep problems too because every time I woke up last night and looked at him he was already awake, which comforted me enough to fall back asleep.

I drift back over to Craig, who's now with Clyde and Token. He's scrolling through his phone. He looks up at me, "What did she say about me?" He asks, immediately.

"Fuck you!" I instantly shoot back. "You guys are always whispering about me behind my back. You don't even know she was talking about you, conceited bastard." Craig flips me off. I flip him off. He smirks.

"Let's go, I'm hungry!" Clyde whines.

"You're always hungry." Craig says. We start walking but we pass the lunch room. I guess we're leaving.

Token turns to Clyde, "You never told me what happened with you and Bebe, Friday." I'm intrigued.

Clyde says, "Well, after the fight she left and I couldn't find her so I danced and then she showed up again. But, by that time I was so fucking drunk it's hard to rememeber exact details. I just know she wanted me so we went to the room and, you know, and then in the morning when I woke up she was super nice. Way nicer than she's ever been and she didn't even ask for anything afterwards. I thought it was a perfect moment. I asked her about our relationship."

Token nods, "Mhm.

Clyde continues. "She said she hadn't really considered me, 'boyfriend-material' but that she'd been thinking more about it recently." You're welcome, by the way. "So, I kinda asked what that meant and she kissed me and said that I was doing a satisfying job and to just keep up the good work." I snort. _Oh, Bebe_. "I'm still confused but I think it's a good thing."

"What about you, Craig?" Token asks.

"I made out with Tweek so it was alright, I guess." Craig says. My heart stops and my whole face turns red. But everyone laughs like it's a joke and Craig slaps my arm with his hand, subtly, so the other boys don't catch it. Craig doesn't laugh but it would seem like that's what's funny about it. I cool down but am very cautious.

After he hit my hand he continues to tap mine with his. He loops fingers around mine and I pull mine away everytime. He's only doing this to be an asshole. I swat at him to tell him to stop but he continues. I can see a smirk on his face and move to the other side of Token. He gives me a look and then gives Craig a look but doesn't say anything.

When we get out to his car and Clyde and Token are in he pinches my ass so finally I just give him another nice, sharp kick to his shin in the same place I kicked him this morning. Craig groans and grabs the injury.

I think I've really hurt him so I kneel in front of him. "Are you okay?" He tilts his head up and pecks me on the lips. I yelp and fall backwards. Craig snickering like a hyena. "Asshole."

He winks at me, but helps me up. I kick him again.

* * *

_Yo, oh my God! You guys gave me so much love last chapter and it feels so nice c: Thanks much for the reviews and keep them coming. I have such good ideas for this story. I made a check list. I have to wake up early tomorrow- ohmyggod. Also sorry for short chapter!_


	8. Phobia

I hate hospitals. I hate the doctors, the people dying, the smell. I avoid them at all costs. How is it, then, that Craig has single-handedly managed to get me to one? True, that when we got here I refused to leave the car and he had to pull me out and carry me to the door, when that got embarrassing enough I elected to just walk in, by my own accord. I'm trembling. Craig went to talk to the receptionist and now he's back and on his phone. His hat has returned to his head and little tussles of hair are peaking out. His brows are knitted together as he concentrates hard for a game on his phone.

I'm buzzing. I keep my leg bouncing, I'm picking at my nails again, and I keep twitching. It's quite frustrating. I bet I look mental. People probably think I'm here because I'm crazy and not because I hit my head. "Ngg!" I bite my lip hard to keep from making any other noises.. The noises are the worst. They remind me of Thomas and I fucking hate feeling like Thomas. Fuck Thomas. Now Craig's staring at me. Oh, God. "GAH!" I should've brought coffee.. How did I not think about that? I'm going to a hospital for Christ's sake.

Craig rises from his seat, placing his phone in his pocket before walking off, with a, "I'll be right back." The way he words it is perfect and also off-putting. He informs me he's leaving, that he'll soon be returning, but where the fuck is he going? Why is he leaving me? What if he's going to tell the lady that instead of having them 'check my head', they should actually, 'check my head'. I wouldn't blame him but I'm absolutely not crazy and if they tried to do a test to prove it, I'd fail just because it would be too much pressure! I'd hope he'd know better than to do that to me. He knows right?

My digits tangle into my hair. "ARG!" What if they do find something wrong with me? What if I end up having cancer?! My breathing speeds up. I think I'm starting to hyperventilate and if that's true, then I'm about to have a panic attack. And where the fuck is Craig? I'm dizzy again...

"Here." Craig hands me a paper cup, filled to the brim with a hot black substance, I know too well. I gasp in air and basically snatch the cup from him. Craig is my saviour! He's is also the devil... I chug the coffee down in gulps, despite it's temperature. It burns but warm my cold hands. I can feel the caffeine coursing through my body and soothing my mind. Craig watches me amused. "Feel better?" I don't answer, I just nod, sipping. I haven't had coffee this morning. I feel deprived. The cup is already almost empty. I stare at it. It gives me anxiety, knowing that soon it'll all be gone. "

"Bebe wasn't being deceit at all this morning." He says. "I know you all were talking about me. It looked like she was giving you a pep talk."

I blush. "You are so concerned with yourself. We weren't talking about you just because we looked at you once." I tell him. Craig seems to be under the impression that I'm at his will. I should take some advice from Bebe's speech though. Maybe not all of what she was spouting is bullshit. If I tried, could I have Craig around my finger? "We could trade." I suggest. "You tell me your secret and I'll tell you mine."

Craig snorts, "How do I know that you won't lie about your secret or just not tell me at all?"

I shrug one shoulder. "I guess you'll just have to trust me." Craig doesn't look satisfied with my answer.

He hesitates, "I'm not convinced the pros outweigh the cons here." Craig shifts in his seat. I could be wrong but I think I'm getting somewhere.

"Interesting." I note.

"And I don't trust you enough to feel confident that you'll actually tell me what she said." Me neither because if your secret isn't what I think it is then I probably won't.

"Tweak, the doctor is ready." The receptionist calls.

Craig and I look up and then my head snaps back towards him. Fuck the mission. I completely forgot what we were here for. I didn't finish freaking out and now it's gonna be a trillion times worse! Craig's hand rests on my thigh, "It'll be fine. They aren't gonna do anything except a few tests to make sure you don't have some serious concussion."

"What if- GAH- I do?!"

"They're gonna treat you; and I'll be right there." He assures me. He stands, "C'mon." Slowly I follow him up and drift behind him on the way to the elevator. He signs at my unwillingness. When I get close enough, he grabs my hand and jerks me into the big metal box. Oddly enough, the elevator smells better than the waiting room. Like flowers and water. And there's nice soft music to help me try to calm down.

Calm music always seems to just rile me up more. I feel like it's a trick and if I'm listening to it then I should be freaking out. Craig's hand bumps into mine as the elevator starts to ascend. His fingers lace between mine and I'm taken aback by his gesture. He was hiking around earlier but this seems genuine to comfort me. Instead it works as a distraction, making me nervous because Craig Tucker is holding my hand and mine is getting sweaty.

Suddenly the elevator jolts to a stop. I hold in a sheik and look at Craig's who's taken his hand back. The lights flicker off, as well as the music.

The elevator broke. We're gonna die. The elevator broke. We'll either starve or the cord will snap and we'll plummet to our deaths. I'm really not ready to die. Yeah, life kinda sucks right now but I always figured when I got to college everything would just get better. Now, I'll never know, I guess. All the things I wish I could've told my parents, and Kenny, and Bebe... I'd have stopped doing drugs completely. Boycott them. I'd start eating healthy and taking better care of myself. I'd work harder at school. I'd be more open about my feelings. I'd try to find medication that worked properly for what it's prescribed...

Huffing drags me from my thoughts. Next to me Craig seems to be having a break down. His chest is rising and falling in short deep breaths. He's... trembling. "Craig," I whisper. He's pressed against the wall. I can't see his face but I don't think I'd want to. Craig panicking could cause the death of me. What's wrong with him? He, of all people should be able to understand that we'll be fine, right? If he doesn't, we're probably not.

Craig sinks to the floor. I can tell he's trying to calm down from the way his breathing changes to something he's focusing on. I do it often. I kneel next to him. "What's wrong?" I ask, softly. Now I can see his face, just barely. His brows are twisted with almost pain, as he gasps for air. I don't know if I should touch him. Sometimes when I'm having a panic attack and my mom touches me I want to hit her in the face but other times if she doesn't I'll pass out. I'd ask but it doesn't seem like Craig's good for talking right now.

Instead I cautiously place my hands on his knees. "It's okay, Craig." I try. "Just breathe..." I say. I try to think of everything anyone's ever said to me to help me calm down but everything's always just made me mad and wanna snap at them. Craig seems to just be all out ignoring me. Not to mention, I am not okay. This is almost my worst nightmare. I'm picturing the elevator cord snapping, us being trapped in here forever, and the more I think the harder it is to pretend to be cool for Craig. "Please, be okay..." I squeak, tears filling my eyes. I hate the dark. I hate the dark. I hate the dark.

Craig's eyes open and we stare at each other. I've never seen Craig look much of anything but right now he looks so very frightened. His eyes shoot around the small box, to every corner and every thing visible in the lighting and they land on me. Craig's arms wrap around me and pull me into him, tightly. "I'm sorry." He says, holding me. He's shaking so violently and I feel like he's trying to comfort me but is comforting himself more. Why is he sorry? Because he can't assure me it will be okay because he's not okay himself?

We're on the third floor and if we fall we'll definitely be severely injured. We're in an elevator, trapped, with no light at Hell's Pass, possibly the worst hospital in the word, due to the lack of equiptment and also the negligent employees. I doubt anyone is watching the cameras and if they are, I bet they're asleep. How long are we gonna be in here?

I believe Craig is claustrophobic or something. I'm not sure how much longer he can be in here and be okay. But, what can I do? I'm not crawling through the cieling in fear that it might start up again and then I'd be crushed. Craig isn't gonna do it. The power's shut down so none of the buttons work.

_VROOOOM_

The lights turn on and the music continues. Craig releases me and I pull back to see him very red-faced and a little sweaty. He takes deep breaths and we sit how we are until the elevator stops and the doors open. Craig rushes out and tries to catch his breath. "Never again." He pants. "We'll take the stairs next time. I need a cigarette." He mumbles. "I need to go home and take a bath." I let a small smile form on my face. Craig Tucker takes baths to calm down. He finally lets out a nice long sigh and turns to me. "I'm sorry. I just... I can't handle things like that." He says. "When I was little I was playing hide and seek with Ruby. I hide in a toy trunk and since our parents didn't know I was in it, someone locked it. I was in there for two hours." He runs his hand through his hair four times.

I just nod understandingly. If I ever have to see Craig like that, I'll probably flip out. God. But, I'm gonna make my best effort to help him before doing so. We'll probably both just go crazy. "Let's just leave and go to my house. I'll make you some tea."

Craig scoffs, "Like hell, I had to deal my fear, now you have to deal with yours." Fuck. "Nice try though."

Before all the bad stuff happened Craig held my hand. I wish he'd do that again. I doubt he would. I think he feels like he's manhood has been compromised. I wonder if Clyde and Token know about Craig' phobia. I will ask later. Right now I will try to convince Craig to take me home. "You know, I'm really tired after that. We should just head back and take a nap. We can cuddle."

"If you have a concussion and go to sleep, you'll fall into a coma." He says, not even glancing back.

I stammer, "B- But, we c- can c- cuddle..."

"We can head over afterwards. It's not gonna take that long, Tweek." Craig tells me. "He's just gonna do a few tests." We approach the door.

"What do I get if I go in there?" I ask, biting my lip again. Not to be sexual, but because I'm a wreck right now and I really don't want to go in there. I don't want to. What if I fail the test? Not because I have a concussion but just because it's too much pressure and I'm nervous?

They're gona think I'm insane.

"We can go back to your place, you can make that tea, we can throw on a movie and _cuddle_."

I laugh. "Why do you say it like that?"

"I'll cook for you and make you coffee."

"Fine!" I surrender. "I'll do the stupid doctor thing."

"I'm sure you're fine." Craig adds, when I open the door. "You know, unless you have some strange disease they've never heard of and is, therefore, uncurable. You're fine unless that happens. But, I'll be here either way."

I snort, "Shuddup."

* * *

I was fine. I just hit my head too much. But Craig was noticeably more upbeat after we left Hell's Pass- for Craig, that is.

The ride to my house is quiet. I'm still thinking about what happened in the elevator. I'm not sure what Craig's thinking about but I'm sure it's of similar nature.

When we finally arrived to my house there's a car already in the driveway. Craig parks out front. "Is that your parents?" Craig's asks.

I groan, "yeah..." At least they're back. I want sure they were coming back. They've been gone for almost a month once. I was younger so I was terrified. When they eventually came back, no one said a word about it. I thought it was good because maybe I'd forget then. But the memory stuck. "Uhm... We can go to your house." I say.

"What? why?"

"I just... I'm not ready to have to deal with my parents." I admit. They know I'm gay. I've told them and they're fine with it so I'm not worried about my walking in that one time. That's not why I don't feel like dealing with them I just know that they're gonna be all over Craig and we wouldn't be able to enjoy ourselves anyway.

Plus, thinking about that memory reminded me of how much I don't like my parents sometimes.

"Sure." Craig turns the car back on and we drive to his house.

Today every Tucker is in. When we walk in, Mr. Tucker is watching TV. He glances back at us. He looks from me to Craig. "Where've you been?"

"Places." Craig shrugs.

"Smartass." His dad flicks him off. Craig returns the favor. "Who're you?"

Mr. Tucker's abrupt question directed towards me makes me yelp and begin to twitch. Craig's dad is so scary. He reminds me of a lumberjack from hell. He could punch me in the chest and it'd probably stop my heart. That is a frightening thought. But, then, a lot of people probably could do that. But I know they wouldn't...?

"T- Tweek!" I squeak after thinking I've waited too long to respond.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Craig's dad's voice is so deep and loud. I can't handle talking to him, I realise but when I turn to Craig, he seems to have lost interest in the conversation. His dad roars, "I ain't talking to him, I'm talking to you!"

I yelp and cover my face. Craig sniggers. "I- I get nervous..." I manage, avoiding direct eye contact with the large man.

He makes a, 'hmf' sound, seeming content with my answer and turns back to the TV. "I'm gonna be working on the truck later." He says, to Craig, I assume.

Craig hums and acknowledgement, dropping his bag in the dining room. "We'll be in my room."

"Use protection." He dad calls to us, halfway up the stairs.

"Fuck you!" Craig calls back with a smirk on his face.

"And make sure you lock the door. Your sisters home. Don't need her walking in on that."

Craig snorts. "Ruby's seen worse." He assures me in a hushed voice. "But daddy can't know that about his little angel." He sticks his tongue out and makes a fart noise. Their relationship is... weird, I conclude. At the top of the stairs his mother exits a room.

"Craig, I need you to take out the trash at some point- oh." she says when she sees me. "Hello,"

"Hi," I smile, meekly.

His mother smiles and it's so soft and motherly. "You're new. The Tweak's boy right?" I nod. "Are you staying for dinner?"

"Uh..." I glance at Craig. Once again he's no help. "Sure." I decide. Craig continues to his room. I trail behind.

"Don't forget the trash, Craig!"

"_'Don't forget the trash'_." He mocks the blonde woman.

"Craig..." She warns.

"I'll do it." He says swinging his door open. We walk inside and he shuts and locks it, winking at me. "Just following orders." He tells me.

"What are you expecting?" I question. "Because I'm almost certain that whatever you're thinking will not ever happen."

"Boo." He throws himself on his bed. "I'm joking, Tweek."

"Yeah," I say, "me too- wait."

Craig bursts out laughing. "Really now?"

"Fuck off." I tell him. "Are we working on our project or what?"

Craig groans, "Not today, man."

Great. "We're gonna fail." I sigh, exasperated, dropping myself next to the niorette.

"No, we aren't." Craig says. He turns towards me. "I promise to do the remainder of the project tomorrow, Tweek." A promise? Now we're making promises? How did we get this far into our friendship, I wonder. Because I know I don't trust Craig enough for any promises he makes. I don't trust anyone. Not even my parents, honestly. They leave too much, how could I? My worst fear is them finally believing I've gone off the rail and secretly sending me off to the nut house. And worse than that, I fear that I'll actually like it there.

_I'm afraid of losing my mind but I'm certain it would be a positive experience. _Thoughts like that make me wonder if I already have.

Speaking of trust, that reminds me of our conversation at the hospital before hell happened. "You wanna tell me that secret now?" I kick my shoes off and pull my feet onto the matress. My socks have little coffee cups on it. It's not ironic either. I fucking love coffee, what do you expect? If I see coffee socks then I'm gonna buy them, man. That's why I have five pairs. They're marvelous. Don't get me started on my underwear collection...

"Let's play the question game."

I don't appreciate him changing the subject. "What's that?" Once again Craig thinks he has the reins! I'll play along for now but I will get my answer, I fucking swear to God.

Craig stares at me. "We played it before."

"Really?" I say, "Why don't I believe you?"

He snorts, "You have a terrible memory. It's a game where I ask you a question and then you ask me one."

"But I already asked you a question and you didn't answer, if I recall." I stare at the cieling, basically speaking my thoughts. What I like about Craig is that he doesn't care so I can say whatever I want and he'll probably make it a joke anyways. "Why would I answer your question if you won't answer mine? It's this 'trust' thing we have. It's not gonna work because I just don't trust you. Nothing personal, I'm just a very introverted person, I like to keep to myself. Also, you're very untrustworthy." Nothing personal.

Craig's silence is enough to break me into look at him. He's just staring at me, blankly. I start to snicker. "What?"

"Let's start. I'll go first." He says, averting his eyes. I fucking hate when he ignores me. It's always when I'm being witty. "What makes you stutter?" He rolls onto his back. "Sometimes you do and then a lot of the times you just don't and then it'll randomly happen. It's weird. I assumed it was when you got nervous but some instences, it didn't even seem like a threatening situation."

"Sometimes I interpret it as that though." I tell him. "Sometimes basic things freak me out. _Can you believe that_?"

Craig snorts, "What is going on with you?" He asks.

I'm gonna ignore that question because I'm pretty sure that's not how the game works. I continue my answer. "Like, with your dad. That wasn't dangerous but your dad is fucking scary and I'm so awkward. Situations like that just freak me out. It's just too much pressure."

He nods, "Hmm."

"Okay, my turn." I announce. "What's your secret about me?"

"Mm, mm," He shakes his head. "Can't ask that."

"Alright, then, what did you and Clyde talk about when we first got to Token's house yesterday?"

"The secret about you." He says.

"That doesn't count as an answer." I say.

"Then ask a new question."

"Why don't you wanna tell me?"

Craig's lips purse in thought. I watch his face. "Uhm, I guess because of, _'this trust thing we have'_." He imitates my voice from earlier. "_'It's not gonna work because I just don't trust you. Nothing personal'_."

"You said the pros didn't outweigh the cons. Elaborate,"

Craig sighs, "This isn't fun. I'm not playing anymore."

"I never was." I shrug. "What were the pros?"

"Oh, my God, Tweek." Craig sits up.

"...What were the cons?"

"Shut. Up."

"What was the nature of the sec-" Craig leans over my and his lips collide into mine. The rest of my sentences runs off into mumbled hums. He has silenced me. I can't even say that I'm mad. His hands enclose my head. His way of holding himself up. He pulls on my bottom lip with his teeth and I let out a quiet breath. "Craig, I-"

"Shut up." He repeats but then his tone changes, "Let's just stop talking." He leans back into my face. I lift my head before he gets to my lips to meet him halfway, eager to have his mouth on mine again. his tongue draws against my mouth and it opens for him.

Craig shifts over me, resting one of his knees between my legs. My heart race accelerates and every time it beats I feel it pound against my ribs. My face is warm and I know it's pink. He moves into my neck, pecking damp kisses all along throat and collar. My eyes flutter shut. "Fuck." He swears.

They re-open. "What?" I sit up, slightly.

Craig says, "Fuck. I wasn't supposed to kiss you. Fuck." No, no, no! I almost whine but refrain, just so Craig can't be an asshole. It's too late though he's seen my face drop in displeasure. He takes a deep breath and contemplates. "It's okay, Tweek." He says. "I'll keep kissing you but you have to tell me what Bebe said."

I'm back at his will. Craig is on the saddle and he's driving the horse. What am I to do? He's on top of me and so attractive. And now that we've started I just can't _not _want him. I'm almost agreeing to telling him without even getting a secret in return.

I can't though! Not without some type of compensation. "I- I..."

"Did this situation just get dangerous for you?" He hovers so close to my face.

"Uhm..." I swallow hard.

If I give in, I lose. I have to remember what Bebe said. What did she say, dammit?! I am blonde! If I want Craig wrapped around my finger, then I have to be the one making him beg.

So I knee him in the nuts.

"God-fucking-dammit, Tweek! Fucking fuck, shit, fucking dammit!" Craig rolls around his bed for a while. Enough time for me to catch my breath, calm down, and collect my thoughs.

"Fuck you. You're gonna have to do a lot better than that, C."

"You fucking suck. You just suck. Goddammit!"

"I'm sorry." I tell him senserely. "But, it's your fault." I add.

He groans. "I'm back to not kissing your ass. We can finish the project today because there's nothing else I want to do you with you. Shit!"

"Fine, forget the apology, I hope I damaged something." I move to retrieve my bag. I pause, "Also," I say, "you just, sort of admitted to having the intentions of making out the whole time." If it's true the only two things he'd do with me is the project and making out and it seemed he already knew he didn't want to do the project, considering he left his bag downstairs.

"Oh, what bullshit!" He cries, sitting up, gently, wincing. I accidently hit him harder than I intended. Oops. "That's just you subconciously admitting you wanna make out with me because you're reading so far into the lines!"

"Get your shit so we can finish this thing." I say, pulling out the project stuff in my bag.

* * *

Dinner with the Tuckers is equally as strange as meeting Craig's parents. It seems the only normal one is his mother, which is think is a facade because everyone else is too fucking weird and with two children, if she were this normal and sweet one of them would bound to me somewhat like her in nature.

It starts with Ruby and Craig setting the table. It ends in them wrestling. Ruby punches Craig in the nuts and because this would be the second blow in less than an hour he K.O.'s. Ruby dances, proud of her victory. They're mother tells them to stop fighting, suspiciously late, since the fight is over.

We all sit down to eat. They don't pray. Craig's dad's plate is the size of what my whole family eats combined and Ruby's is half of that, not to mention she's almost my height. I may have an inch on her. An inch I will take with pride. She's a freshman though. She must be tall for her age, she has to be. Craig is also tall so I can see this.

Craig's dad has red hair and brown eyes. His mom has blonde hair and blue eyes. Ruby has strawberry blonde hair and brown eyes. Craig has black hair with his mothers eyes. If he didn't have them, I'd swear he weren't a part of this family. It makes me wonder about if his dad is his dad. They look nothing alike except for height and anyone could be tall. His mother is tall- to me. What if Craig and Ruby don't have the same dad. I couldn't ask him that though. Plus, I'm too paranoid.

The dinner consists of Craig talking to his dad about a truck. I have no idea what they're talking about. It's almost as if they're speaking another language. It goes right over my head, but it's interesting to watch them interact. It's different than earlier. I can see the father, son bond now.

I do not have this with my father.

Craig's mother is the one to change the conversation. She must've noticed my puzzled expressions. I don't think it bothered her. I feel like she contains the same amount of information. Ruby too, because she was talking about it with them. Craig's mother talks to me about school, my parents, and about my future plans.

When the dinner ends, his mother takes the plates and starts to wash them, Ruby pulls me aside and tells me she approves of me pursuing a relationship with her brother, Craig slaps her in the back of the head, they wrestle, Craig punches Ruby in the boob, and she succeed, finally, in kicking him again in the nuts. Craig is not having a good day.

Ruby repeats that I have her blessing. I just blush and babble about how it's not like that. Now, I wonder if it's that obvious that I'm gay or if the Tucker's are just really abrasive. I doubt it's the latter. They're just really straight-forward meaning I do look like a fag.

"You don't look like a fag." Craig asures me. "You just... act like one." He laughs at himself.

"Lame. Take me home."

"Okay, c'mon."

And he drives me home. In conclusion, the Tucker's are fucking crazy. Weirder than my family, but you can tell they're family. My family is so disconnected, which doesn't even make any sense because there's only three of us. And my parents have a good relationship. Just the fact that I haven't gotten a call about how I wasn't there when they got home or to tell me that they are home.

I manage to dodge them to my room. The night is melancholy and I don't get sleep.


	9. Manicure

Something about Christmas makes me depressed. It's always in December that I feel my worse. It's probably because when you were young Christmas was magical. But as you get older you learn things like Santa not being real and you get selfish. You focus on what you didn't get. Parents and children get less interested. And it just reminds you that one day you're gonna grow up and have to pay bills and you won't talk to your parents as much.

That freaks me the fuck out. My parents already leave me alone for long periods at a time and I hate it. How am I supposed to function in society? I can't. I know it and my parents know it but if they care they either forget or they don't. Maybe they're waiting for my eighteenth birthday to send me to the nut house.

Kenny's hand caressing my bare back almost tears me from my thoughts, in the way he does. I turn my head towards him. He sends me a charming smile and his hand dips. I reach back pull it up again. "I'm tired." I tell him.

He pouts. "How are things?" Kenny never pries. It might be that he's used to me just telling him and never wants to make me uncomfortable because despite being a jackass he's still... I don't know what he is but he's managed to gain my trust and that's saying a lot. Since he's asking me how I'm doing he must be worried.

"I'm fine, Kenny." He knows I'm not but he also should know I don't wanna talk about it.

He nods, "Bebe told me you were avoiding your prince."

"My prince?" I muse. "And to whom may you be referring to?"

"You know who I'm talking about Tweek. What happen to Craig?"

I shrug. "We turned in the project. What other reason would I have to talk to him?"

"I don't know. You couldn't think of something?"

"I wasn't trying to." I pause. "What were you doing with Bebe?"

"Aw," he pokes my cheek. "So cute when you're jealous."

"I'm not jealous. She's seeing Clyde. Bebe is with Clyde." I sit up.

"Oh. Right." He says. "I wasn't with Bebe."

"Kenny," I warn.

He groans. "Butters, Bebe, who else Tweek? I know you want me all to yourself but I can't be tied down."

I scoff. "That's funny, Ken. I don't want you, but you have so many people you could sleep with, so why do you have to prey on girls already in relationships and pretty little virgin gay boys?"

"You and butters aren't even friends. What's your beef?"

I sigh. "Have you even talked to him since the party."

"I know you haven't." He counters.

I narrow my eyes at him. "You're impossible." I tell him. He slept with Butters again. No one ever listens to me. Not Kenny, not Bebe, not my parents.

"Have you ever thought maybe Butters just wants a relationship like you and I have? Like I have with a lot of people? You don't know him enough to know what he wants."

"He likes you though! I know if I liked someone and they were willing to sleep with me I would do it but imagine how much it'd bother you when they're also sleeping with every other girl in the school!"

"You don't own me and you don't own Butters. He's not this weak China doll like everyone thinks. No one gives him a chance." Kenny says.

"Fine." I give in. "I don't care. Sleep with him but leave Bebe alone."

"Do you have a bone for Clyde or something?" Kenny asks me suspiciously. "Because I'm okay with you pretending I'm anyone except him."

"I don't pretend your anyone. Gross, do you pretend I'm Butters?"

He wraps his arms around me. "Of course not, Tweek. Out of everyone, you're my favourite." He assures me. "But Butters is gaining on you."

"Whatever. I don't like Clyde." I say. "But he actually likes Bebe and she acts like she likes him back. It's all so fucked up, man."

"I don't like arguing with you. I'll leave Bebe but I'm keeping Butters. But you gotta give me one more round."

My face burns, "Kenny..." He starts kissing my neck. I sigh, submitting. I place by hands on his shoulders. I chuckle, "You drive a hard bargain... But- mmm- I guess if I must."

He snorts, "Poor you, right?" He abandons my neck. "Since you're really through with Prince, I can leave as many marks as I want."

Kenny lays me down so he can lean over me. "Sure."

His eyes darken. "Funny. I wasn't asking." Kenny's lips attack mine and I strife to keep his pace and also breath. He pulls away, abruptly. "Wait. I've been meaning to ask you about the break."

"Hm?" I answer, dazed. I hate when he tries to have conversations during our make outs. I can't focus on anything right now except that we're both naked, I'm hard again, and his hand low on my stomach.

"Just wanted to make sure we're good to hang out. We haven't a lot recently and I miss hanging out with you." His lips graze my neck. "And this doesn't count as hanging out."

"Yeah, of- hah- course, Ken. I always have time for you." That sounds way more sentimental than it was meant to. I just don't have any other friends I'd hang out with. He can take it however he like. God knows I'd never develop feelings for Kenny and vise versa.

* * *

Bebe came over later so I could keep good on my promise to let her paint my nails. She seemed unnerved and that was unnerving. She's usually happy. Around me, at least. Most people are happy around me, considering. And the worst part was that she was trying to act like she was okay. It made me hesitant to bring up the thing with Kenny. She scares me the most when she's buffing my nails. She's so aggressive but gentle.

Instead I ask, "How're things with Clyde?"

Bebe looks up at me for once. She seemed to be in deep thought. "Fine. He's a real sweetheart. Super caring." She finishes coating my last nail. She gets a little on my finger. "Goddammit!" She groans and her head drops.

"Gah! Bebe are you okay?"

She starts to pull out nail polish remover and cotton swabs. She cleans around my nails. "Yeah, sorry, hun... I'm just... stressed." If Bebe were me, she'd always act like this. Because I'm always stressed. Its interesting to think about.

"You can- uhm- if you want to, you can talk to me about it."

Bebe starts to add a rhinestone to the corner of each of my fingers. I hope I don't mess them up since she's making them so fancy. "It's Wendy." She says. He stops with the nails and stares at me. "Don't tell anyone." It's not a, 'don't tell, but I actually mean tell' type of 'don't tell anyone'. Oh God, secrets. I nod frantically, though, I know I wouldn't trust myself with any type of secret. "She's cheating on Stan." She tells me. "With Eric fucking Cartman."

My brows raise and then furrow. "What?"

She nods, "I don't know what she's thinking. I knew the whole time, I just thought maybe she'd stop eventually or admit it to me herself. She never did. So I told her I knew. Like obviously he's no good for her. He's no good for anyone!" She exclaims. "And Stan is such a good guy. He's perfect honestly. She's lucky to have him. He loves her so much, Tweek." She sighs, rubbing her temple. "Why would she throw that away? For what?" I consider accusing Bebe of knowing the answer to this question considering she's doing the exact same thing to Clyde but think better of it. For now. "She won't listen to me until Cartman does something to hurt her. And then I'll have to be her shoulder. It's frustrating."

"Bebe," I try.

"I think she's slept with him." She shudders and gags. "Oh, _God_."

"Bebe!"

"Yeah?" She finishes the topcoat. "Perfect. Thanks for listening to me rant. I feel better, I guess."

I raise my hands toy face. All my nails are even for once since I bite them constantly. And they're all a glittery pastel green with a sparkly flower rhinestone on every one, covered in a shiny topcoat. They're so nice, I make a pledge to try to not fuck them up for as long as possible. "It's called morning dew. You wanna keep it?"

I wave her off, "you already gave me that hair stuff. Plus, I couldn't do it myself anyways." She shrugs and packs up her nail bag. Who knew girls had that. "Bebe,"

"Yeah."

"I know you were with Kenny..." She looks up, her mouth parted but she doesn't explain herself. "It's none of my business." I say. "But you and I know Clyde's too nice to be treated this way. I think you should break up with him if you wanna be with Kenny."

"I don't want to be with Kenny." She spits. My eyes widen and I shrink back. She sighs, "Sorry... I don't wanna be with Kenny though, Tweek. Trust me." How? I bet Clyde trusted you. "Kenny and Clyde can offer different things that I can't get all together from either of them. Kenny's got a great dick but Clyde's like, an awesome boyfriend."

"Talk to Clyde about what you fucking want, Bebe! It's not hard!"

She groans and slumps against my bed. We're currently sitting on the floor. "It's just embarrassing..."

I scoff, "If you can explain to Craig Tucker how to fuck, I think you can ask Clyde to be a little rougher in bed."

She gives me a side stare, "I never told you about that." I blink. "I said I slept with him and it sucked."

"No," I say, cautiously. "I remember you telling me the whole story."

"Yeah, Tweek, but I didn't."

"Are you sure?"

"Whatever." She waves it off. "I'll cut it off with Kenny and talk to Clyde, okay? And if it happens again, you can... cut my hair."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah," she pulls out her phone and starts checking messages. "Wow, Tweek, you should totally talk to Wendy."

"If she likes Cartman then she should be with Cartman but if she doesn't like him enough to break up with Stan then she doesn't like him. She needs to make a decision. Leading both of them on like that's just cruel."

"I'll tell her that." She puts her phone down. "How're things going with Mister Mystery?"

"I already told you, Bebe. They aren't."

"Ugh, Tweek, you didn't even try. You were doing so good too. Does he try to talk to you?" I stare at my pineapple socks. she gasps. "He did?" I still don't answer. Which is like me answering apparently. "Let me see your phone."

"What? No way!"

"Pfft, C'mon, Tweek, I've already read your and Kenny's messages on his phone. And I do not judge you. I just wanna see what he's sent you."

"If you open it, he's gonna know I read it."

"Please, Tweek, he knows you're avoiding him, you might as well commit." She says. "And are you telling me you haven't actually read them yourself?" I shrug. "We can read them together. Less scary."

I've wanted to open the messages so badly but I just can't! It's easier to pretend I've never gotten them at all, even if it tells him it's been delivered. I squeak, "fine! Let's do it."

Bebe and I go to my conversations and she clicks on the highlighted one. Craig's. It starts so pleasant. Hey, wanna hang out later? And then another one a few hours later addressing how I didn't respond to the first one. The next day, My parents and sister are gone and Clyde's being an ass wanna come over? Nothing the rest of that day. The next one says, Are you ignoring me? I don't have patience for this. I have patience for you but not a lot more than my usual. The last text was sent yesterday and says, There's something I need to talk to you about.

By the time I'm finished, in trembling. "Bebe, what have I done?"

Bebe squeals, "Tweek, oh, my God! Perfect timing! Leaving him wanting more. Making yourself unavailable makes you more desirable! So smart, I can't believe I didn't think of it myself."

"What do I do now?"

She shrugs, "its been a day. Talk to him. I have to go anyways. Tell your rents I said hello." She stands. "This was fun. You should let me try your makeup next. Think about it." Bebe exits my room. I watch her leave.

It has become clear, Bebe is trying to turn me into a girl. And, worse than that, I think I'm slowly coming to terms with it. This town is full of mad men. Each crazy in their own special way.

My phone buzzes and I scream, throwing myself under my bed. Only really succeeding in getting half my body under and hitting my head. Once I've calmed down I snatch my phone up and check the name. It's Craig. The phone begins to vibrate again. I scream again and chuck it. It continues to buzz. He's calling me.

HE'S CALLING ME! Oh, my God. What do I do? I take a deep breath, grab the phone to my ear, and swipe to answer. I meant to say hello. I did. But I don't.

"Tweek."

My hear races. "I'm- ngg- here."

"Why are you avoiding me." He asks, bluntly.

I wasn't expecting him to be so direct. So I fumble. "I- I wasn't- gah- avoiding you. I just... wasn't actively p- pursuing you."

"And I kind of was!" He snaps.

I blush. "I'm s- sorry." I tell him. "I was just... busy."

"Busy." Craig repeats.

"You said you had something you wanted to talk about?"

He sighs, "Yeah, I wanted to tell you in person, but I guess it doesn't matter." I don't say anything. "I scored tickets to a concert in Denver I want to go to. Come with me."

"You never ask. You always demand."

"And then I usually get what I want."

I scoff, "Who likes you?"

"Oh," Craig says. "So, the problem is you don't like me. You should of just said that so I wouldn't end up looking like a fucking idiot. Thanks. Forget it. I'll get Red to go with me."

"_Red_?" I ask. "Why her?"

"Why do you care? You don't like me." He says. "Anyway, that's all I wanted to talk about. I'll leave you alone. Bye."

"Wait, Craig-" The line goes dead. Fucking asshole! What if he calls Red right after me? I took too long! I didn't use the right words! I should've kept Bebe here for support.

After a bunch of texts and a lot of panicking I finally manage to snag Red's number and shoot her a quick text saying if Craig hasn't already contacted her, not to accept his offer. She says she has no idea what I'm talking about but sure.

I grab my coat and head out.


	10. Blizzard

I stand in front of Craig's house, sweating, out of breath, but somehow freezing to death. It's snowing way harder then it has so far this year. I didn't slip on any ice because there isn't any left in sight. It's all buried in snow, which by now has reached at least three feet. I watch it fall as I try to catch my breath. I wipe the sweat from my brow, looking up at the Tucker's mahogany front door.

I ran here without thinking. I don't know what I am gonna say. I don't even know why I'm here. I can't go to a concert! I'd have a panic attack. I'd probably die. Unless I were on enough drugs but I've been cutting back. My anxiety is deafening. It just keeps getting worse.

Why am I here? I ran the whole way. I should just go back. I don't have anything to say to Craig. It's so cold out here. I'm gonna get hypothermia if I stay out here too long but the run back might keep me alive enough to get to my house.

I glance back and my jaw drops. The snows is falling faster and harder than a few seconds a go. The snow levels raised dangerously just in the matter of minutes. I can't go back. I can't go in.

The door opens and I scream behind my hand. Craig watches me with bored eyes. "That was fast." He says. His hair is wet and sticks to his face. "I wasn't expected you for another five minutes." He pauses and his eyes narrow, looking particularly sharp. "Did you run?" I just let out a heavy breath. "Come inside. It's cold." I begin to speak but it turns into a bunch of stuttering and noises but it's a protest. He knows it is. Maybe he can drive me home. But Craig groans and grabs my hand, pulling me in the house and shutting the door.

It's too warm to refuse. There's a fire going in the living room and the TV is playing old Red Racer reruns. Craig's wearing a faded t shirt and some gym shorts. He saunters into the kitchen and grabs a carton of orange juice. He tilts his head back and pours it into his mouth. I grimace. That's very unsanitary. I need to remember to never drink anything in Craig's house. I suppose I have kissed him. Still...

"You wanna take that coat off. Its warm in here." I don't say anything. I don't know what I'm doing here. "You're mute now?" He asks, amused. "Okay. Well, what'd you come over for?"

I maneuver out of my coat and shuffle into the living room, placing myself on the couch, in silence. I don't know the answer to that yet. "Can you change the channel to the news?" Craig calls from the kitchen. "I'm gonna run upstairs and grab some blankets."

I grab the remote and click to the news. The news lady switches to the weather man who warns that a blizzard is currently overhead and if you're not inside, you might wanna get there. I glance out the window but there's not much except white and grey. I can see wind blowing furiously and I know that I won't be getting home anytime soon. Craig returns with the blankets. I begin to warn him, "They said there's a-"

The lights and TV all shut off at the same time with the sound of the heater powering down. Fire light dances across the left side of Craig's face. "What was that?" He asks me.

"Did the power just go out? Was that the heater?" Craig shrugs and I sigh, "They said it's a blizzard. Can your dad fix the heater?"

Craig lays a blanket in from of the fire and drops the rest on top in a pile. "Yes. He can fix almost anything... if he were here." My face drops. "I know. It sucks right. First you get stuck here with me and now we have to us each other to stay warm. It's the end of the world." He speaks, monotonously.

"If we f- f- freeze it is! Is no one home?! What if the blizzard lasts a week? And we run out of food? What if the power never comes back on or-"

"Tweek, please," Craig sits on the blankets. "Are you off your meds?" He asks.

I scoff, "What?"

He shrugs, "I can tell. You seem jittery. Just not stable."

"_Not stable_?" I gap. "How can you..." I shake my head. Craig is an asshole, how can he not? He's right too, I am unstable. I'm a fucking mess. I'm crazy, bonkers, off the rails. This whole town thinks I'm psycho, my parents, my friends, and now even Craig. He probably always did. Why did I think he didn't?

They're all conspiring against me, I bet. I'm just sitting here waiting to be sent off. I don't belong there! They can't send me to a mental institution! But I'm crazy! Not normal. I get jitters and I twitch when I'm nervous. I drink too much coffee. I'll never grow another inch. I need coffee now. The coffee machine is off. No power. No coffee.

"Hey, would you calm down?" Craig glances at me. "What is the problem?" He gets up and sits on the couch next to me, entirely too close. He's entirely too close. A memory of me kicking Craig in the groin after him pressuring me flashes in my mind. I need more space. I need more air. And I need caffeine. I will eat the grounds. I don't care. I need it. I scoot over until I'm against the arm of the sofa. "What's wrong, Tweek?"

Craig sudden change in tone is unnerving and suspicious. "I c- cant think- I- I- I can't breath right. I need coffee but there's none and I can't make some but I need it. I don't want to go away!"

Craig looks confused. He leans in about to speak again but I flip, "AND I NEED SPACE! I. need. space!" I shove him away from me and then stare at him with wide, frightened eyes. "I'm- I'm sorry- Gah!" I grab my hair. "I want to be home."

Craig stands. Now he'll leave me. He'll leave me to die alone. "The stove probably still works." He says. "If I boil water, you think you could make coffee?"

I blink at him, holding my hair back and out of my face, suddenly feeling twenty degrees too warm. "Maybe."

"Calm down." He tells me. Not in a rude way like people usually do which makes me only freak out more because I figure I'm bothering them with my existence and I don't know what to do about it, he says it like he genuinely wants me to try to calm down and knows there's no way for him to help me. Their isn't. No one can help me. Not even medication can help me. I'm pathetic.

I can hear Craig in the kitchen and focus instead on the noises he makes. Cupboard opening, dishes clanking, cupboard closing, water running, the clicking of the stove, and finally low humming from the niorette. My heart throbs. I should've stayed home. But here I am.

I came here to tell him I'd go with him to the concert but that's not even possible. I can't be with one person without panicking. How could I handle hundreds? Simple: I couldn't. So why am I here? Why don't I ever think through things before I do them? I think so much about irrelevant shit but I can't think through simple decisions like running to Craig's house through a snow storm about something I've decided I couldn't do anyway.

"It's boiling." Craig informs me.

I abandon the couch. "I hope you have a strainer or something."

"Uh, I don't know what that is but if we had one it'd be in the drawer to your left."

The only light is spilling through the kitchen window. Despite the curtains being drawn completely back still isn't a lot due to the storm outside. I open the drawer. Its full of miscellaneous kitchen utensils. I find a strainer and thank the heavens for Mrs. Tucker. I grab their coffee grounds and mix it with the hot water. Craig watches, which means, despite his expression he's interested. I mix the water and grounds. Then I grab a mug, hold the strainer over the cup and more the mixture through. I work fast and recklessly. I spill grounds and coffee everywhere. I can't even care. It's not like the counter was spotless to begin with and I need this. Fast. I drop the strainer in the sink and sip from the mug, pleased.

"Shouldn't the caffeine just make you more jittery?" Craig asks. I shrug because it doesn't so there. No, it does but it keeps me in a good mindset and that's more important. "Are you feeling better?" I nod. "Good. You wanna tell me why you're here now?"

"I didn't want you to ask Red to the concert." I admit.

Craig snorts, "I never was. You're really gullible." He tells me. "Also predictable. I just wanted to see you."

My face heats up. "I can't go to the concert." I add.

"Why not?"

I avert my eyes, "I couldn't handle the people." I remember the elevator and add, "And how could you? You're claustrophobic and you're okay with being smushed together with a bunch of strangers?"

"Hey," he points a finger at me, "do not label me." He says, sternly. "And, yeah, it's possible I'll freak but it might not happen if I'm not thinking about it." He says. "And if I'm watching the concert, I don't think I would be. Plus, if I did I could just go to the bathroom and calm down. It'll be fine. And you'll be good too if you're drunk."

"Craig, no, I can't do that."

"Why?"

His eyes burn into mine and I can't hold his gaze long. "Because,"

"Why don't you like me anymore. Maybe you never did. Were we only hanging out because of the project?"

My eyes widen with bewilderment, "_Weren't _we?!"

"Oh," he says.

"What's that?" I ask. "What's the 'oh' for?"

"I don't know." He leans on the counter. "I just thought we were friends."

"You should of said that!" I snap, annoyed that I have been worrying about irrelevant shit again. "I thought you didn't like me."

"What the hell, Tweek?" He asks, looking as irritated as me. "I said it the first night at your house."

I stop. "Liar."

"I'm not lying."

"Are you serious?" He sighs and covers his face with his hand. "When? I- I don't remember that!"

"I don't remember the exact details, dude, but it happened."

I shake my head, "I didn't remember. I was high. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize." He waves me off. "Let's just move on."

"Okay." I mumble, feeling the most stupid I've felt in my entire life. That's a lie. I've had a lot of moments. Some that weren't even my fault when I look back on it now. I hate children. They're so ignorant and intolerant. I'm talking about bullying. I digress.

"Why would you keep thinking that if I was texting you? You just ignored them. If anything _I _should think _you _don't wanna be my friend."

"I thought we were moving on."

"Whatever." He starts back for the living room.

"I didn't trust it." I answer anyways, stalking behind him a few feet.

"This trust shit. We'll never trust each other. That's just that." I don't know what that means exactly but it makes me unhappy. He's right but I want to be able to trust Craig. Its just something I can't see happening. I don't really trust anyone. There's Kenny but I don't even really trust Bebe.

Craig sits himself back in front of the fire and I settle next to him. I chuckle, remembering something from earlier. It wasn't particularly amusing at the moment but now the mood's lighter. Craig raises an eyebrow at me, "What's so funny?"

"You still watch Red Racer." I say. "They've stopped making episodes, man. There are only two seasons. How many times have you re-watched it?"

Dare I say Craig looks offended. Maybe shocked. "Red Racer is legendary." He tells me. "You couldn't re-watch the series enough in a lifetime!" He says. I mouth an 'oh' and nod understandingly. His eyes narrow, "Have you ever watched it?"

I tap my chin, "I recall watching one episode when I was little. I didn't like it."

He stares at me, not blinking. "Are you joking? Which one?"

I shrug and shake my head, "I don't know. He was racing this guy with a monkey. The monkey wore a green helmet."

Craig scowls, "Green racer... I know what episode you're talking about but you shouldn't judge the whole series on one episode." He says. "One day you should come over and we can watch it together. I guarantee you'll like it then."

I imagine us doing that now and my heart soars. But, of course, the power is out and all we're left with to entertain ourselves is this fire. I do find my mug to be pretty interesting though, when I know the only other thing to look at would be Craig and that's not gonna happen.

I feel like his eyes see through my very being. Like he could tell if I were lying or hiding something. Maybe he could even see my soul. How scary. I wonder if he knows he's doing it. He must. He probably does it on purpose. I bet he has powers. If any one person in the world had powers, it'd definitely be Craig. If not him being able to read minds, then the ability to turn people to ice or stone with his cold stare. But maybe he really can't help it. Maybe he even resents it. I imagine it puts off a lot of people. It could isolate him. And if that's not what he wants, could be a lonely existence. I get that.

The temperature dropping isn't gradual and is very noticeable. I grab one of the blankets and wrap it around me. "No one's home." Craig says, answering my long forgotten question. "Ruby went with my mom to visit our grandma. Dad's working." I nod, finishing my coffee with a content sigh. "How are your parents."

I glance at Craig. I wish he wouldn't ask questions like that. Him and Kenny. It's bothersome. It doesn't matter how I feel. Why do they care so much? What does telling them do other than make them realize how much I suck and feel bad for me? Why would I want that? "My parents are fine." I say, stiffly.

"That's good." He drops it. It's quiet now besides the fire cracking. "How come you don't want to come with me to the concert?"

"I want to." I defend. "I just can't. I'm not gonna get drunk for that."

"What do you mean? You love getting drunk."

I clench my jaw. "You don't know me enough to say that. You hardly know me at all."

"You're pretty easy to read." He says, his hand combs through his hair. It's still damp so it sticks up in the front.

"I doubt that. I think I look easy to read."

"Yeah, I read that about you."

I let out a deep sigh. "You don't know anything about me so just shut up."

He shrugs, "Maybe you're right." Hail starts to hit the house from outside. The wind roars against the walls. I bundle myself tighter. Out of all the people to be stuck inside with. I'd rather have Bebe or at least Kenny. We'd probably fuck through the whole thing. That wouldn't even make me mad. "Can I try to figure it out?"

I blink the niorette. "Huh?"

"Who you are. Can I try to figure it out?" He repeats, watching me.

I shrink under his gaze. "Do whatever you want."

"Why did you kiss me? Before."

Blood rushes to my face. "I- I don't remember, man. It was a while ago. I was high."

"Do you just kiss people like that often?"

I glare at him, "Do you just let people suck your dick like Thomas often." I'm not sure if I can try to make Craig seem at fault for letting me kiss him in the first place. What angle am I going at here?

His lips purse, "No. He was the only one and he wanted to. I didn't mean to offend you. I just meant, if it were someone else, like Stoley, and he came over and you two smoked would you have kissed him."

I snort, "Craig, I hardly think or would have happened the way it did with anyone else but you." His eyes turn to the fire. "I mean, if I got partnered with Stoley we would have just done the project. But, since you're a fucking weirdo, things went differently. No one would have been in my closet. No one would have pulled out my pipe. None of it would have happened. Plus, a guy wouldn't have kissed me. Even if he were gay."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because it's true!" I exclaim. "Everyone knows I'm crazy. And why did you? You're not even straight! You don't feel anything."

"I love it when you say that." Craig mutters, sarcastically. "I have feelings, asshole. And, you know what? I have feelings particularly for you so shut up." He says, silencing me. "_You _don't know _me_, as it would turn out."

Silence fills the room once more. Feelings. I replay his words in my head a few times, contemplating my next words. "Feelings for me." I finally say. "You _must _know how that sounds."

"I know what I said." He says, simply. "I said what I meant. Feelings don't have to be romantic." Meaning his aren't.

"So what the hell are you talking about, douchebag?!"

"I don't know!" Craig snaps back. "But if I didn't like you, do you think you'd be here right now?"

"I don't get it!" I grab my hair and shake my head. "I don't get you! You're playing games because you think I'm weak. Just leave me alone! I'm not like Thomas, I'm not just gonna blow you because you're hot!"

"I don't think you're weak. I know you aren't." Craig starts. "And I'm not that shallow." He stops talking. He turns to look out the window. It's all white and and the wind is blowing like crazy. "You're kind of insensitive. I didn't read that about you."

I make a face, "Aw, did I hurt your feelings again?"

"Again?" He smirks.

"Last time was when I said Token's abs are better than yours."

He scoffs, "You didn't hurt my feelings." He says, confidently. "Just forget it."

"What type of feelings, Craig?" My heart is racing. I cover the bottom half of my face with the blanket. It smells like him.

"Um, I don't know, Tweek. One's that make me want you around. I just don't understand why it's such a big deal." He says. "To Toke and Clyde, I mean. They act like they know something I don't. How could they? I should know more than them, right?"

"Clyde said you thought I was cute."

"Yes." Craig says.

When I glance at him from his response he's starting at me fixedly. I yelp and cover my face. "What? Why are you staring at me?" I peek through my fingers. Craig is smiling now, but still staring.

"What're you hiding from?"

"You're eyes are scary." I say, re-covering my own eyes, shielding them from his. When he smiles though, his eyes are less scary and more attractive. Like magnets to my eyes.

"Oh." He says. "Sorry. I just..." Craig's hands take a hold on one of my wrists. My eyes grow as he brings my hand away from my face. Craig's closer now than he was when we were on the couch but now I feel more than okay with it. "I really want to kiss you right now." He says. His eyes are hypnotic. I don't like looking at them but right now I can't avert my gaze. His eyes lower to my lips. My breath stops and for a moment I feel like time comes to a halt.

"Craig,"

"Sorry." Craig begins to sit back.

I almost gasp from him stopping so suddenly and grab his shirt to pull him back. He gives me raised eyebrows, that soon settle and a smirk etches it's way onto his features. "I- I-" I stutter.

Craig snorts and presses his lips against mine. I take in a deep breath through my nose. He's so cold compared to me. I feel like I'm overheating.

His mouth moves slowly against mine. How is this different? How is this different than when I kiss Kenny? I don't have feelings for Kenny, just like I don't have feelings for Craig. But as he kisses me I can feel my heart pound against my ribs and my head's so hot, it feels like my brain is melting and might spill out of my ears. Everything inside me is building up in the pit of my stomach and I wonder what will happen when it overflows.

Craig gradually slips the blanket from my shoulders and then his hand pushes my shoulder back until I'm laying down On the blanket and he's over me. My hands find the back of his neck. One of them starts into his hair, pishing him into me more. He bites down on my bottom lip and my heart skips. Is it possible for one person to be so perfect?

The sound of us kissing drowns out the wind and the hail that's started outside. Craig's hand that isn't holding him over me starts to unbutton my poorly done up shirt. Slowly, but somehow gracefully one after another, my shirt slowly opening. His hand glides over my stomach.

Craig lifts up to open my shirt and slide it off but stops. His eyes focus in on my neck and my chest and his whole demeanor drops. He sighs. I sigh. He closes my shirt and goes back to his original sitting position.

I blink and sit up. "I don't want sloppy seconds." He says. "It feels gross. All I would be able to think about would be Kenny. That's very unappealing for me. I don't even know how I like you." He glances at me. "No offence."

I tune Craig out and just try to catch my breath. When I'm with Kenny my heart beats faster but it's just a reaction from the stimulation. Craig only kissed me. His fingers felt like fire on my skin.

"I'm sorry." I say.

"It's not your fault." Craig tells me. "It's not like we're in a relationship. You can do whatever you want."

"I'd rather make out with you than Kenny." I admit with a faint blush.

Craig smirks, "That makes me feel good to know, believe it or not."

"Do you like me, Craig?" I ask, still laying on my back.

Craig hums in consideration, "Yeah, I guess." I'm not gonna ask him to elaborate. I don't know if he means he just likes me in general or how I meant when I asked. I'm not gonna ask because I like this warm tingly feeling too much. And right now, as we are, I'm really happy. I'm happy in a way Kenny and Bebe can't make me feel. I'm happy in a way where I'll go home and when I think back on it, it will still make me happy.

I have a crush on Craig. And now, I'm stuck in a house with him. It doesn't look like his storms letting up soon either. It looks like it's only getting worse.

* * *

_sorry for long wait and thanks for love. Keep foloowing and favoriting and reviewing. You guys ask how I update all the time. Easy: I love this story and I love you so there. How could I not?_


	11. Blizzard: part 2

My eyes open, reluctantly. I have to squint to let them readjust to the lighting, which isn't much but the fire and light that seeps through the window. I'm on my side, staring at the fire. I roll onto my back and stare up into blue eyes.

I don't jump, just stare. "You fell asleep." Craig tells me. My head's in his lap.

"I fell asleep." I repeat. It sounds impossible. "I fell asleep." I say it again to make sure. "How long?" I ask because I'm feeling refreshed, which is also unusual. Even when I do sleep it usually doesn't do much to help me.

He shrugs. "An hour?"

Wow, that's amazing. "Do you sleep?" I ask him, knowing Craig's an insomniac even with it not verbally announced. It was obvious. I just wonder to what extent. Because I never see him sleep.

"Not really."

"How do you... stay sane? You don't drink coffee or anything."

Craig shrugs. "You don't need to be worrying about me. I'm fine. I sleep when I sleep."

"Okay." I say. Craig looks back to the window. I consider asking about his family and their well being, or even Clyde and Token. But I haven't seen Craig use his phone at all since I've been here. I doubt he'd know. And I kind of doubt he even cares. He's not heartless. I suppose it is just a blizzard. They're probably fine right? Well, on that note, what about my own parents?

I glance at my phone on the floor in front of the fire. They're probably okay too. They're fine. I don't feel like dealing with them. So, I stare at Craig again. His face is even attractive from this angle. Amazing.

He suddenly looks back at me. We don't speak just stare. I guess it should be weird but it's not even awkward. Its comfortable. Me, in his lap. Us, staring at each other. Together, in a snow storm with no power or heat. Just this huge blanket he snatched from his parents room because it's the heaviest cover the Tucker's own and I'm too small to possess any type of body heat of my own.

The first time we really talked was that day of the project. I know Kenny talked to him about me and he was so nice. Maybe. I don't honestly remember the day/ night clearly. But if it had gone bad, wouldn't we not be here?

And then over time, I don't know what happened. I always knew Craig was attractive, but so is Stan and Kenny. But I don't feel so compelled to hold them and kiss them. I want to hold Craig so badly. I want his arms around me. If I had to be away from him long, my heart would burn.

This kid. This kid with black hair and - strangely - blue eyes. This kid who doesn't seem to own any other hat. This kid who has two freckles on his left ear, neck, and collar bone right next to each other in such coincidental precision, I have no choice but to blame illuminati. This kid who's captured my heart in an iron hold and doesn't seem to have any plan of returning it. This kid, that will ultimately be the death of me, I know. Somehow, I can't care.

"Your-" my voice comes out so alien. It's like its not my own. High and frail. Like I'm breaking. I'm breaking. I gulp. Craig's still looking at me. Has been the whole time. Cold, Medusa eyes. Turning me to stone. "Texts." I finish, averting my gaze, uncontrollably. Death of me. Breaking.

Craig just raises an eyebrow, urging me to continue. "You said you had something you- you wanted to talk about." I say. "And, I know you've already said a lot. I just don't feel like that's what you initially had planned to say and- and I just want you to know now that you're a bastard. And, I am gay, Craig. So, I know all of this- us- whatever, you don't really care. I might start to..." The more I speak the weaker my voice gets and the redder my cheeks become.

Craig expression, blank, turns almost amused. I'm glad my pain makes him happy at least. Craig leans forward and places a nice kiss on my lips. "Sorry." He says, pulling back.

I assume he means for leading me on like he has. Which is the worst thing he could have possibly said to me. And to top it off he gives me a kiss. What an asshole.

My heart burns but Craig's right here. How could I even hypothetically think Craig could/would like me. Craig's cold, Medusa eyes match his nonexistent heart. Just like Thomas. I'm just like Thomas and next, I bet he'll get Pip. Go through all the weak crazy blondes because they're vulnerable, no one cares about them, and you're _bored_.

I shove Craig's chest as far as my arm can reach away from me. This does cause me to topple to the floor but that's even better because I'm out of his dirty lap. "I'm not comfortable with kissing you until we establish what the fuck we're even doing. I'm not gonna sit here and let you use me because I'm..." My eyes flick to the fire, "Not normal." I'm _not _crazy. "Because you think Thomas and I are the same person in a different body and he's done with your shit. I bet," I start, " this was your plan the whole time. That's why you were so nice to me. No one's _ever _that nice to me unless they're sympathetic or just as fucked up as I am. And I hate every single one of those people."

Craig stares at me blankly. Yeah, I bet he didn't think I'd be smart enough to see it or say anything. My heart aches, nonetheless. But, Craig said he liked me. He told me he had feelings. "You said you had something to tell me. _What_? I feel like you're dancing around it. Stalling- I don't know. I should go."

"Seems like you already have an idea what I was gonna tell you."

"I am not a f- fucking mind reader!" I snap. "Just say what you have to say or s- swear to g- God, Craig, I'm leaving." Craig snorts. No one ever takes me seriously. I stand and Craig follows. "What are you afraid of?"

"Tweek, you're overreacting." He grabs my arm and skilfully twists me back into his arms. His grip tightens as soon as he's got me. "Calm down."

I'm gonna lose my fucking mind. My cheeks burn but not because I'm embarrassed. I'm fuming. "Craig, let go." I say through gritted teeth.

Craig shifts me without letting go. So now I'm facing away from him. He presses against my back. "Make me." He breathes against my ear, sending a shiver down my spine.

I kick him hard in the leg and he let's me go but soon has me in a lock again. I push him away and kick his leg again. He goes toppling to the floor, taking me with him because he's still has a hold on me. I yelp. We wrestle around for ten more minutes. I bite him twice and he licked my face (like I even care), until we're back in front of the fire, disheveled and out of breath.

Craig's arms are wrapped around me and I might as well be sitting in his lap. I gave up. It was fun. The wrestling. I've calmed down. But I'm still upset and unsold.

We watch the fire in silence. Once my breath is caught, I'm breathing hard from being so close to Craig. I'm sitting on him for Jesus sake. Sitting in Craig Tucker's lap. My face burns.

"People started a rumour about me in middle school." Craig says, suddenly. I try to glance up at him but the position's awkward. "Because in middle school I dated Wendy and I kissed Red and later slept with Bebe. And then I just stopped. I didn't pay attention to girls or anything. I didn't have a girlfriend and I'm 'attractive' so I _have _to have a girlfriend, _right_?" He shrugs. "They started calling me asexual when I started turning girls down. After people found out, it became some sort of game. Like, _'let's see who can turn Craig on'_."

"Uhm."

Craig ignores me. What he's saying must be important. "It was disgusting. I slept with Bebe when I started getting worried. But it only made things worst because it assured me that I wasn't attracted to girls." Craig pauses and it seems like he won't continue.

"Yeah." I say.

"I don't know. I just thought this would make you feel better." He says.

"What?" I ask, shifting, causing friction between us. I blush again. I wonder if Craig is even concerned.

"I didn't like girls!" He repeats. "But," he chuckles. "That doesn't mean I'm asexual. God, teenagers are stupid."

It takes me four full minutes to register his words and what they mean. I flip around. My hands on his thighs, holding me up. "You're _gay_?! Fuck- you always were!" How could I have not seen it? Maybe I did. I wouldn't have let myself fall for someone straight. Oh, thank you, Jesus.

Craig laughs. "Yeah, yeah." He says. "Clyde knows. Token knows. My mom knows. Ruby probably knows. I think she snoops on my computer." I grimance. "Yeah." He says.

He pats his lap and I settle back into my spot. A little more comfortably with my newfound knowledge. I know something about Craig Tucker. Something no one else knows. I can't help but feel giddy.

"Still," Craig says. "I don't like anyone. I haven't ever, I think. That's why sometimes I think I might really be asexual." He says. "It's lonely. But no matter who I've ever been with, it never felt right. And I've never had a crush on anyone." He tells me. "Contrary to what you believe, I know you and Thomas are very different. Tweek," he says. "You're different." He says. "I- God- Can I be gay for a second? Fuck it."

Craig takes a deep breath that I feel on my neck and then he leans his face into my shoulder. "I think you're cute when you act skittish because it reminds me of my guinea pigs. I like the way you look so peaceful when you sleep. I like how you always smell like coffee and fresh laundry." My cheeks burn brighter.

"Craig-"

"Shut up, I'm not done." He tells me, arms wrapping around my torso. "I like when you're around and we're alone and we just hang out. I hate when you're with Kenny. I fucking hate Kenny. I like you're eyes. I like you're smile. I like you're hair and you're freckles and how much you blush, but you're such a pervert. It's okay though, I like that too. I like how weird you are and how distant you are and trying to figure you out." Craig stops. "Do you get it?"

I open my mouth but it only feels like a desert and proves to be useless to me now. I shake my head and turn around, moving out of Craig's lap to see his face because I don't get it. I don't get someone like Craig. Someone like Craig Tucker, he could virtually have whoever he wanted in a snap of his fingers. Someone like Craig Tucker, who _supposedly _hates people in general. And I'm a spazzy nutcase. Someone like Craig Tucker, who was in football, track, and baseball. Who's six-foot-whatever, who's got dreamy blue eyes, a 4.0 GPA. And he likes _me _because I'm a freak...? "How?" I sputter. "Why?"

"I just told you why." He says, looking a little dejected. "Tweek, you're genuine. You don't care about what those kids think and you think no one cares about you but, somehow, you have me and I care. I purpose next time my families out, we can order Chinese food and watch a movie _as a date_. So, what's your move?"

"My- my _move_?" Craig nods at me, expectantly. "I don't- No one's ever really liked me... Or cared." I tell him, lost. "I don't know, I guess."

Instead of getting mad, as I anticipated, Craig just looked sympathetic. "That's okay too. Think about it. You can figure it out. I'll wait."

I smirk. Nice. Craig Tucker, who, despite popular belief, isn't cold and doesn't have a Medusa heart. Craig Tucker who wants _me _and doesn't care that I'm weird. He likes me _because _I'm weird. Craig Tucker, who makes my heart ache from just looking at me because, _dammit_, I want to kiss him _so _bad!

"Y- yes!" I tell him quickly. Craig smiles and there's no way those eyes were ever anything but warm and inviting and so damn attractive. I push forward and kiss him. I kiss Craig so damn hard. He just chuckles and pulls me back into his lap. I wrap my legs around him, to hold myself in place. My hands start at his neck, working their way into his hair.

"Good." Craig starts kissing my neck. "I don't want you to see Kenny anymore."

"Pfft. Done." I say. "But I'm gonna have to lock you up because every girl seems to want you."

Craig snorts, "I don't think you have anything to worry about." His hand grazes my cheek.

"Just 'cause you're gay, doesn't mean they won't try something."

"Aren't you friends with them?"

"Oh, yeah." I say, adjusting a strand of hair that's fallen in his face. "But, still, those girls are crazy and I'll fight if I have to."

Craig laughs, "Good to know."

"Can we..." I pause, looking down, "-because I know you said the marks turn you off." Craig smirks. "Can we keep kissing?"

"C'mere." He grabs my thighs and pulls me into him again. He leans his face into mine.

* * *

_finally, but troubles ahead o:_


	12. Improvisation

The blizzard's practically over, thank God. Yet, I'm still with Craig. By now the power's back on and we'd have taken to starting Red Racer- apparently I have a long way to catch up- but we were too busy making out for the past half hour. After that we just sat by the fire and talked. Craig made me more coffee.

"So, if you've actually been gay this whole time, how come you never got turned on when we make out?"

Craig snorts, "I did. Every time." I blush and gulp the remainder of my coffee. I can't imagine being able to turn on anyone. Kenny does not count because he can be turned on by a fucking pineapple. Not someone like Craig. He says I'm different. What the fuck does that mean? That's so criptic! Different doesn't necessarily mean good. Damn it.

"Okay, then, if you were gay the whole time you tricked me." I say. Craig blinks at me. "You said to me that you don't get turned on." I explained.

"And you took it as a challenge."

"But then you said you didn't get turned on after we made out," I say, blushing.

"It would have been weird," Craig shrugs. "Plus, you were high." I guess he didn't want anything serious to happen when I was under the influence, which I appriciate, but he did make out with me still. I don't know. I could say he was taking advantage of me, but I think I got high so I could make out with him.

"What about all the times after that?!" I exclaim. I made out with him to help him feel, but the whole time he was feelings anyways.

"You didn't ask, all the times after that," Craig says, simply. He looks like he feels pretty justified, but he's a lot more confident than I am. He's right though. At least, I don't remember asking much after that. We just made out. And if I think about it, maybe, it could have been obvious that Craig had a thing for me. A thing for me. That's amazing.

"Say it again." I bite my lip to suppress my smile.

"Say what?" Craig glances at me and his hand is stroking my hair.

I move so our faces will be closer. I've started to get this idea that if Craig likes me then I could possibly make him as nervous as I get. But it's just a theory and I think I've been hanging around Bebe too much. "Say that you like me."

"I like you."

"No," I whine. "Like you did before. You looked like you meant it." I grab his face. "Say it and I'll kiss you."

Craig smirks, "Cute." Me? I'm cute. He thinks I'm being cute. "I like you, Tweek." Craig beats me to the punch, pressing together our lips. Mine are actually quite sore at this point, but I don't think I could ever get enough of Craig's lips.

My phone buzzes, catching both of our attention. I pick my phone up, getting the number. "Hell's Pass." I relay to Craig.

"What would they want?" He questions.

I shrug and smile, "Probably calling about the exam. I bet they found some crazy disease or they deemed me too unstable for the public."

Craig laughs. "Not completely unbelievable."

I answer, "Hello?"

A woman's voice comes through soft and cautious. "Hello, sir, are you Tweek Tweak?"

I glance at Craig, concern building in my gut, despite my earlier joke. I usual anxiety and paranoia returning rapidly. "Yes. Is this about my exam?"

"Oh, no." She tells me. "I'm sorry, sir, but there's been an accident. You're parents have been in an accident," she says. "They were driving in the blizzaard and crashed, the impact caused a lot of snow to collapse on top of the car, closing them in."

My throat closes and all the moisture from my mouth disappears. I don't speak. "They are both alive but unconcious at the moment. You're father is fine. He only recieved a broken arm, mild hypothermia, and a little trauma." Relief floods only a little of my brain. The other part swarms with thoughts of my mother. They were trapped after the accident. How long were they in there, abandoned? How is she? What if she's in a coma? "She took a bad blow to the head and also some damage to her spine. The doctor is still diagnosing. We request that you come in as sonn as the blizzard ends. Please don't drive during the storm. I'm sorry."

Her spine? Is she paralyzed then? They don't even know what's wrong with her. Her head and her spine, only the most important things. They don't even know how bad she is. "Sir?"

My voice is lost in me. I look to Craig who's giving me a concerned look. I can imagine how terrified I look. "What happened?"

I hand the phone up and by impulse tkae in a huge breath. I hadn't realized I wasn't breathing until it came back and now the deep breaths come faster. They're short, deep, and rapid. I'm having a panic attack.

I start to tremble and Craig grabs my shoulders. "Stop," he says. "Don't shut down. Breath," he orders me. "Slow even breaths."

But I can't even hear him. My parents. Without them. I'll definitely be sent off to the nuthouse or an orphanage or something _and then _the nut house. Oh, God, what would I do without them? "You will pass out!" Craig shakes me. "What happened? What's wrong?"

I shake my head, shaky breaths coming out of me. I try to slow them but the though of my parents. My parents. They're in the hospital. "I- I- Oh, God." I sputter noonsense. I can't get my words in the right order, the right pronunciation. And I can't stop stuttering. I swallow hard. What is Craig saying?

Craig shakes me again. "C'mon," he says. "Let me help you." His eyes plead, even though his eyes are the same eyes he had the whole time I've known him, which isn't long but now, I can see it. I can see his emotions. But it's the same face. So _I _changed.

I take a deep breath. "My parents are in the hospital." My wors are at least allegeable.

Craig processes this and thinks. "Are they okay?" he asks, carefully. I nod. "Are you okay?" I shrug. God, no, I never was. "What do I do?" He asks me. Craig. "When you're like this. What do you want me to do to help you? What do you need me to do?" Definitely not shake me. That shit is making it worse so I remove his hands.

I hear him and I understand his questions. I just still can't understand what he sees in me. And I have no idea what I need from him. "C'mon, Tweek," Craig repeats. "I can't improvise here, man."

I look at him, desperate ( for what, I don't know) and out of breath, even though I've been breathing so excessively. "More coffee?"

I blink at Craig and then my eyes start to water. My lip begins to tremble and I start sniffing. "You asshole! No, I don't want any _fucking_ coffee." Craig grabs me and pulls me into his chest. I just cry.

* * *

_Been so freaking long and I don't even know why... Sorry for the wait, I'll try to b faster next time but anyway review and stuff._


	13. That Hospital Smell

"You don't have to stay," I whisper. I didn't mean to whisper but I guess I don't have the energy to talk in my usual obnoxious high pitched voice. I think Craig's ears would be thankful. I continue to stare at my hands. They keep fidgeting. I scrap under my nails, pick at the skin, fold them together, and unfold them. I can't help it but the jerky movements feel detached from my mind which feels so dead.

"You don't want me to?"

Have you ever stared at something so long you start to feel like you've lost your vision? I blink away stars and shapes but am very cautious not to look in Craig's direction. I didn't mean to offend him but I know he's offended or maybe he's annoyed. "It's late… It's _really_ late. This is inconvenient. I-"

"_Tweek_," Craig cuts me off with a deep stern voice. It shocked me so much I accidently looked at him and now I can't look away. "This isn't your fault," Craig tells me shaking his head. "And I want to be here for you. I-" Craig sighs and shrugs. "I don't know. I'm not good at these things, sorry but sometimes these things just happen- and they suck but you need people around you to… get through it… I- Does that help?" He groans, "I suck." Craig rests the heel of his hand against his forehead, frustrated.

"Uh," he moves the appendage from his face. "I'm not gonna leave you in a hospital at one in the morning waiting to hear if your parents are okay, alright?- _Unless_ you really want me to," Craig tells me. He pauses, turning towards me, "Do you?"

I shake my head, returning my gaze to the working fingers in my lap. I try so hard but a single tear falls and is absorbed into the fabric of my jeans. And then another. And another. And then a sniff. Craig grabs my shoulder and turns my body into his. I rest my forehead on his shoulder. "I'm so scared," I mumble into his shirt.

"I know." Craig strokes my hair. I wonder if the people walking by us are staring. They're probably busy with their own problems right? Since they're at a hospital. I can't believe I'm crying again. Craig probably thinks I'm like a child. Weak and timid and panicked. I couldn't take care of myself so it's good that he's here. I suppose if he weren't and I were in a place where I wasn't taking care of myself, Kenny would.

I hadn't even thought about Kenny. Which is kind of harsh of me. What? Now that I have Craig, Kenny is like dirt? Kenny's been very helpful when I've had my moments, hasn't he? If Craig weren't here- If Craig had never been here then Kenny would be here. I would have called Kenny freaking out and he'd tell me to make some tea and calm down, then he'd find a way to my house through the raging blizzard, and comfort me in that way only Kenny can because Kenny has that nurturing trait where he doesn't even have to say anything, just his presence makes you feel okay.

I should call him. He'd be hurt if I didn't.

"Are you… okay?"

Whereas, Craig, seems confused by the whole comforting procedure. I do believe Craig _would_ call it a procedure. I be he'll go home and google a how to.

Am I comparing Craig and Kenny? Am I doing so while my parents are laying in a hospital and I don't even know how they're doing?! Oh, God, I'm gonna be sick.

"I gotta-" I push Craig back and jump from my seat, running to the bathroom.

* * *

I glance into my empty cup before tossing it in a trash can we pass by. "Right this way," the doctor tells Craig and me. Actually, I don't know if this guy is the doctor or a nurse or some intern. We walk through hallways, some long, some wide, but everywhere reeking of that nauseating hospital smell. Medicine, sick people dying, depression, grief, millions of dollars and med school.

Shortly after I threw up all over the bathroom, (someone had to come clean it up(the thought horrified me so immensely that I almost fought the custodian for their supplies to clean it myself (which I did))) a lady called my name, told me to follow a man, Craig and I got our thing together, and here we are.

The man stops outside a door. "Your father woke up a hour ago or so," he tells me. "We did some basic tests and he's significantly okay."

"Significantly?"

"Minor fracture in his arm from the crash," he tells us. "Since he's older, it will take a little more to heal but other than that he's fine."

"Where's my mom?"

The man flips through papers on a clipboard and then shakes his head. "I'd have to ask the desk."

"Then ask," Craig speaks for the first time.

The man and I stare at him for a beat before the man nods and heads off. He stops halfway down the hallway and calls, "Your father might still be feeling the laughing gas," and then continues.

Craig turns to me, "Are you okay?"

I nod, "I'm okay… but, I should have a trashcan near me… just in case."

Craig nods, rubbing my arm, "Hey, your dad's fine."

"Yeah, but what about my mom?"

"She's getting there too… They crashed in a bunch of snow- it- it can't be that bad…"

I can tell Craig is conflicted. He doesn't want to lie to me in case it is worse than we thought and I completely respect him for that. I grab the doorknob and slowly push open the door.

When Craig and I walk in my dad's head swivels towards us. He has this look that you can just tell he's drugged up. He grins widely and says, "My offspring! I remember when you were conceived. Your mother was so beautiful back then. We were the classic football player- cheerleader story. Of course there was that one guy who tried to steal her from me," my father chuckles. "Those were the days. Why, I remember once in middle school- I hadn't hit my growth spur like all the other boys and this one Johnny Davison tried to take my lunch money. I knew I had a choice right then that would affect the rest of my life. Offense or defense as my coach would explain it later."

My dad nods and then stares at the TV. Craig's brows furrow together and I just pull up a chair. "What did you do?" Craig asks.

My dad stares at him, curiously, "The Tucker's boy?" He looks to me. "The Tucker's boy?"

"Yeah, dad, we- we did a project together."

"My name is Craig," Craig says.

"Are you two…"

"Dad!"

"What? I wanna know what's going on in your life."

"Oh, God…"

"Tweek and I are dating."

"_What_?" My head snaps towards the niorette behind me. Craig just shakes his head with a shrug like, '_sorry'_.

"Well then, it is very nice to meet you, son."

"Dad, what happen?"

My dad looks at me and stops smiling, "Son, it was a tragedy! Your mother heard about the storm so we decided to head home from the café. We had to leave immediately if we wanted to beat the storm but I could not for the life of me find my watch. I don't even know why I had taken it off! After twenty or so minutes we find the watch in the car!" My father laughs. "Our faces- priceless," he nods.

I sigh, "Dad, finish the story, man!"

"Oh, well, we headed out but it was much darker than before. The windshield was frozen over and the wipers only made it worse. It was dark so we couldn't see much. We didn't see the ice, swerved, crashed into a mountain or something. We couldn't get the doors open and it got cold and your mother was in pain."

"Where was her phone?"

"It had died and she didn't charge it last night. She was gonna do it at the store but forgot her charger."

I scoff, "This is why you should have a phone. You could have called somebody, dad."

"Son, you know how I feel about those things."

"You'll use payphones though- and house phones-"

"It's different," my dad tells me .

"Just a flip phone, dad. Anything," I throw my hands up, exasperated. "You guys could've froze to death!"

"Son, you're being dramatic…" he accuses. "You're mother and I were fine. As my mother used to say, 'The world has got it's ways'. She was such a wise woman."

I grab my hair, frustrated, "Gah, dad, you're high. I can't talk to you when you're like this."

"Son," my dad says, "Keep it cool."

"C'mon, Craig, let's go get something to eat before we check on my mom," I push to my feet. "Go to sleep, dad. We'll pick you up later."

"The Tucker's boy, son?" my dad laughs. "I just can't get over it. Does Thomas know? There's no way."

"Bye, dad, sleep well." I grab Craig and drag him out of the room. "Where do you wanna eat? I can't eat here so don't ask me to. Just pick somewhere that has salad…"

"Wait, are you okay now? Or is this another break down?"

I stop and glare at Craig. "I did not 'break down' and I'm just hungry. Let's go get something to eat before they tell me my mom is either fine or never gonna walk again because of something so stupid because my parents are helpless and lost all the fucking time!"

"Oh," Craig nods. "You're mad at them for being irresponsible."

"God, they can be so immature. Like, this is something teenagers would do!" I ruffle my hair.

"C'mon, now, you're parents aren't that bad…" Craig muses.

"Yeah, no, they're great," I say. "They leave me randomly for short to long periods for stupid shit, act high all the time, and act like children. You know what's worse? They own their own business… and it's doing _good_! So- so they can just leave and shit and not worry about being fired. They have no cares, it's like they forget they have a son and that it's me!"

"Really?" Craig asks.

"Yes! God, yes, ask Kenny, dude."

Craig grimace, "Fuck him"

"They're just constantly zoned out, forgetting, unrealistic, or confused… They put themselves in real danger, Craig."

"Yeah, I get it. What are you gonna do?" he asks.

"What _can_ I do? That's just how they are. Like, how I'm paranoid. They can't help it."

"That fucking sucks."

"No shit," I roll my eyes. "So, where do you wanna eat?"

"There's a drive-through a mile up the road. I think it's twenty-four hour. Let's go check it out."

"Okay," I agree. "When we come back, they'll hopefully know about my mom…"

**-u-u-u-**

_How goes it? Happy belated holidays and whatever. You guys are so fricken nice. Thanks for all the support with this story. Really motivated me to keep going. Hope you enjoyed this chapter_


	14. Open 24 Hours

I huff, "It's almost four in the morning." Craig rubs my shoulder. "Why are you pampering them?"

"Don't they deserve a little pampering after a day like this?"

I scoff, "This is a direct result of their careless actions. They're almost forty and they have no idea about consequences. They don't keep up with their cell-phones, drive through a _blizzard_, _and_ wreck the car and you buy them ice-cream."

"Simmer down. Your parents are high and your mom's in a brace. Have some compassion."

"Yes, dear, _simmer down_," my mother slinks up next to me giggling. I wonder if she'll be embarrassed when she thinks back on this tomorrow because I don't think she'll even care. This is really how they act all the time.

"We do deserve a little pampering," my dad says. "I've been raising a child for almost eighteen years so I can tell you, children will change your life and your perspective. Things that used to be important suddenly seem trivial. It's a whole new chapter of your life with experiences that are so unique. Like a river."

"_Okay_," I say.

"Tweek, I've told you. If you keep scowling all the time, you're gonna get worry lines." My mom rubs the creases between my eyebrows with her thumb. But then she starts using her other thumb until she's just moving my face around.

"She looks like Robocop, doesn't she, son?" my dad snickers.

"Are you guys joking? Are you just trying to prank me? I bet the anesthetics wore off hours ago." They don't answer and just laugh some more.

Craig walks up to the counter to order. He glances back at me, "Want something?"

"Yeah," I say. "I want to go home."

"Boo!" My parents chant. "Party pooper," they call me. I simply remind them once again that they are forty!

Craig continues to stare at me so I snap, "Coffee."

He smiles and says, "Want some sugar with that coffee?"

"My parents are right there," I tell him.

He shrugs, "They don't care."

"Can we just try to get home, please?"

"Sure thing." Craig orders the ice cream and my coffee and we wait.

He really stopped at some twenty-four hour diner as if he planned for us to eat here. There's no way. I hate what he's trying to turn this into. As if it's no big deal because my parents are okay. But they aren't okay. My dad's arm is fractured and my mom's in a fucking spinal brace. I feel like I can't take my eyes off them anymore. What if this had happened on the drive to one of their long trips? And I wouldn't even know. Because if they were both unconscious the hospital wouldn't even know they had a son, right? When would I have found out? Would I have found out?

Craig startles me when he grabs my shoulders. He apologizes which makes me feel gross. Like he's being nice to me because he feels bad. Usually, he'd probably just laugh at how easily frightened I am. He smiles but I pout. I know I'm being childish, I guess. But I'm just not happy right now. I don't feel like being happy right now. Not even for Craig. I just want my coffee and I want to leave. When I glance at Craig again he's no longer smiling.

I'm such a loser.

"Oh Richard, look, how sweet!"

My father chuckles, "Remember being their age, honey?"

My mother lights up, delighted and she nods too enthusiastically. "Those were the best days of my youth, Richard. You and I took on the world."

"We still do!" They laugh and giggle and my frown deepens. This should be funny. But why am I not laughing?

I couldn't leave the diner fast enough once all of the deserts were made. I hadn't even realized they never made my coffee. It made me angrier that I was offered coffee and didn't receive it than if it were just never mentioned.

"I'm sorry about your coffee," Craig said. I stare at him. I never thought he could genuinely make me mad but he is right now and he isn't even trying. I know I'm probably just being stupid or maybe Craig is just terrible in these situations.

"Tweek's always been so forgetful," my mom tells him. "One day, I remember," she giggles, "He came all the way home from school. He had walked that day," she laughs some more. "When he walked in I said, 'Darling, where's your backpack?' and you know back then he didn't have a phone either. So he walked all the way home and completely forgot his back pack!" She and my father roar with laughter.

"He's definitely your son," my dad tells her.

"Oh Richard," she laughs. If I weren't so obviously pissed off by everything, I think Craig might have laughed at that.

Craig pulls up to our house and we head inside as fast as possible. It's still pretty blizzardy outside. I don't know if the power will be on in my house either. As I'm unlocking the front door I start, "It's already really late so we're all going to go to bed, okay, mom and dad?" They don't say anything so I turn to them. They share the same loopy smile. "Right…Okay." I usher them inside and upstairs to their room. I give them a little help changing into pajamas but I leave them soon after. They seemed pretty sleepy though. I hope they had fun because I don't think they'll be having too much fun tomorrow when their meds wear off and they realize the car needs to be repaired now and they both have injuries.

Fucking hell.

I head to my bedroom where I expected to find Craig but don't. Instead of looking for him, though, I pry off my stupid boots that are soaked and then I peel off my stupid socks that are soaked and wonder if the socks were the problem the whole time. Then I kick my jeans off because I'm just not having it today. And I switch my shirt for a softer and looser fitting one. And then finally, I hop onto my nice, cozy bed, wrapping myself in the blankets like a burrito. But, it's still pretty cold.

Where the fuck is Craig? I bet he left. Probably family. I can't blame him but that's just so perfect for the list of shit that sucks about today.

The door opens.

I laugh. I'm so dramatic.

Craig enters baring gifts. "Someone looked like they could use a little pampering of their own," he says. "So I made you some coffee and I saw you had cookies so I made those too but like, I was planning on eating most of them honestly."

"That's fine as long as you keep me warm."

Craig hands me the food and then settles onto the bed next to me. He rearranges the blanket so it covers him too but that's fine because now that he's pressed against my back, I'm significantly warmer.

I pull out my phone. I don't even consider time as I call Kenny. Because I know that bastard's awake.

"_Hello_?" he answers pretty quick considering.

"Hey, Ken, what's up?"

"_You know_," he says simply. "_What about you? Crazy blizzard. How you holding up?_"

I laugh a little. "_I'm_ fine."

"_What does that mean?_" I hear him doing other stuff. Craig starts grabbing cookies from the plate in my lap. I look at him. "_Who _isn't_ fine_?"

"My parents got into an accident, driving through the snow… They're okay. Well, I mean. They're alive and stuff."

"_What the hell? Are you okay? Why didn't you call me? You must've been freaking out! I can come over right now, man_."

"It's fine, Kenny. I'm with Craig. I was with him when I got the call so he drove me and we brought them home and they're… fine… so…"

"_Oh_," he says. I hear a lighter. He must be smoking. That's probably what he was doing. "_Look at you, sounding so mature and like you have it all together_." I snort. "_So he's there now?_"

"Yep."

"_How are things going? I heard you two weren't talking anymore._"

"Who told you that?" It better not have been Bebe. But if it wasn't Bebe, who else would it be? Craig is watching me and it's starting to make me uneasy. What does he want? Is he mad I'm talking to Kenny? Fuck him. I was friends with Kenny before we started fucking. And at least I'm calling in front of him!

Kenny laughs, "_It wasn't Bebe, asshole. It was Clyde. He said Craig was depressed because you were ignoring him. Nice one, by the way._"

"I wasn't doing it on purpose, Kenny," I tell him. "I mean, like, not for _those_ reasons."

"Are you talking about me?"

My eyes snap back to Craig. "No, fuck off." Craig narrows his eyes at me. I don't like it. "Anyways, I just wanted to talk to you. Today was kinda crazy."

"_Wait, are you two like, official now?_"

"Yes. I guess-"

"Yes, we are!" Craig says loudly so Kenny will hear.

Kenny laughs, "_That's exciting, right?_"

"We can talk about it when Craig's not being a nosy asshole." Craig's hands slide up my stomach and inside my shirt. Which would have scared me less if his hands weren't freezing but probably would've still scared me. I shoot him a look to say _what the hell are you doing_ but he ignores it.

"_What's the damage anyways?_"

"My dad fractured his arm and my mom is in a fucking spinal brace. They act like I'm crazy for caring. This isn't my paranoia this time, they could've _died_! They could've done permanent damage."

"_Yeah, man, I feel you. It'll probably be better in the morning. You should talk to them though_," he says. "_At least let them know that they're giving you anxiety, you know?_"

"Yeah," I agree. Craig's hands travel up over my chest and back down, resting on my thighs. "Uh, Kenny."

"_Yeah?_"

"I'm gonna go. It's late but I'll talk to you tomorrow or something okay?"

"_Yeah, of course_," he says. "_And if you ever need anything, I'm here for you, alright, man_?"

"Here for you," Craig repeats. He shakes his head. "I don't understand how you don't see it."

"See what?"

"The feelings you two have for each other."

"What are you talking about? That's the whole relationship, Craig. That when we're friends but if we're both single and horny then we fuck. It's not that complicated."

"You can't just _have_ sex. It means something. Maybe not much it's there. It's always there. It's like planting a seed."

I laugh, "You're crazy and I can't tell if the innuendo was intentional or not but, props."

"Do you love him?"

"What kind of stupid question is that?! You'd have to be absolutely just plain fucking stupid to fall in love with Kenny McCormick. That's setting yourself up for disaster."

"Right," he says. "Okay, fine, whatever. It'll be okay for now."

"When will it not be okay again then, Craig?"

"When something happens. Because something will happen."

"You're paranoid," I tell him with a smirk. I get to tell Craig he's being paranoid. "Even if Kenny does really have feelings for me, I don't share them. Just trust me. You are so wrong."

"Hm," he says.

"Kenny said that Clyde said you were depressed because I was ignoring you."

"Well," Craig says. "You'd have to admit to ignoring me for that to be true." I lay down and he lies down next to me. I fight a smile and he stares at the side of my face intensely. "Were you?"

"Not on purpose," I half-confess. "I guess I was just scared of getting hurt," I tell him. Then I roll over to face him. "Because I was dumb enough to think you were straight."

"Ha-ha."

"Now," I say. "You mentioned pampering?"

"I did."

"I thought you said you weren't kissing me."

"I don't need to kiss you to pamper you."

"Basically, what I'm hearing is, I'm getting a massage."

Craig smirks, "I can do that."

"It better be a massage, Craig. None of your pervertedness."

"Okay, well," he says, sitting up. I roll onto my stomach. "If I'm a pervert, I'm not the only one in the room."

Craig gives me a massage and it's actually really nice. I'm sure it doesn't amount to a real massage but it's relaxing after the shit storm that was today. Literally. I fell asleep during it and woke up when Craig was moving back next to me. He pulled me into him and I thought that was kinda rude. What if I hadn't been awake, it would've definitely woken me up. But I pretended to sleep through it. Maybe I wasn't awake.

* * *

_Gotta be honest with you when I say I'm losing faith in this story. So if you like it... then better say sum idk XD_


	15. Pre-Winter Break

Every time I end up sitting with these girls at lunch, I wonder how I got here. It's mostly Bebe. She kinda drags me around like luggage. In a good way. Bebe's the type who needs luggage and I'm the type who needs to be dragged around. Or I won't do anything.

"Tweek, you look different?"

I jump. It's the first time someone's addressed me yet. And I was pretty deep in thought. "Um, what?"

"Yeah," Red agrees with Annie. And after thinking for a moment says, "You're almost… serene."

"Yes, _exactly_!" Annie nods. "And content," she says.

I blink. "You're pretty distracted too," Bebe adds, leaning against me. She smirks, "What's on your mind?"

I blink some more because, how mean. Bebe already knows about Craig but it's not like we're running around holding hands and making out against the lockers. Even though, low key, I wish we were. It's just better now, I think. In a lot of ways.

Craig drives me to school. We go to class. See each other occasionally then we have geometry together, where he tries to flirt with me and freaks me out because shouldn't he care more?

Everyone pretty much knows I'm gay and the way he flirts makes it _so_ obvious. And then I get flustered because why would he act like that in public- _in school_, no less. Not even because he's gay but because it's embarrassing!

And Bebe's always making faces when he does. It's too much.

Then I either go to lunch with Bebe or have lunch with Craig and his friends, I suffer through the rest of the day, and then Craig takes me home. Though, we've been hanging out after school mostly. Until it gets dark or we have dinner and then Craig leaves. But, I mean, it's only been a week.

I must've went red or something because all of the girls' attention was suddenly on me. Which seems to be a trend, I've realized, when I do happen to sit with Bebe. "Oh, my god, Tweek, do you have a boyfriend?" It's Sally who ultimately asks.

Yikes. Do I? Is Craig considered a boyfriend? He's a boy... and a- well. We kiss. He does nice things for me on occasion. He's mostly an asshole though. "Um..." I repeat. Does it even matter if I tell them. Craig seems like he doesn't care at all. "Maybe. I guess. I make out with someone who doesn't want me to make out with other people so... yes?"

There it is. Now I'm being bombarded with questions. _Who, when, where, how_. It's funny how people think I'm a virgin or something. "Yes, Tweek, do tell," Bebe says with a quirk of her eyebrow.

"I don't know if we're ready for that information to be disclosed."

They laugh. "What does that mean? Are they in the closet?" Annie asks.

I shrug, "I don't know. But, at the same time, I'm not gonna be the one to out them."

Red sighs. Annie rolls her eyes but agrees, "Yeah," she says. "I get that. That sucks. Dude, literally nobody would care though. And it's not like we would let them get bullied," she says. I think she sounds extremely naive. But do I feel like having that conversation right now?

And I laugh because I think if it got out that Craig was gay, _a lot_ of people would care. Mostly shocked reactions, I think. And maybe some disappointed girls.

When Annie asks me what's funny, I wave her off. I assure them they will be the first to know.

That is, when I know what our plan is- Craig and I. So far, my parents know (obviously), Craig's mom knows (they're surprisingly close), Token knows, and Clyde knows- Oh, and then there's Bebe.

Nothing's really happened.

Bebe gives me a look. If anybody caught it, they know she knows. But, whatever. It's not that I trust Bebe to keep it a secret, 'cause I don't, I just don't care. At least not right now.

Have I really been... noticeably calmer. Is that Craig's fault? That's weird. I don't wanna think about it.

"So, what're the plans for break?"

This starts a new conversation about everything the girls plan to do over winter break. Annie's leaving for family in Kansas but Bebe, Red, Heidi, and Sally basically make their schedule at the table. First they'd sleepover at this house, road trip to Denver for Christmas shopping, sleep over that house, lunch, ice skating, dinner, party... And they lost me.

Bebe taps her nails. She does it a lot unconsciously. She's doing it right now. It was never something that bothered me but now it makes me think about how Craig taps on me. I think he does it unconsciously too. Just when we're together. Like, on my arm and shoulder and back. I _love_ when Craig touches my back. He hasn't tried my chest again since 'that time' but I wonder if I like him touching my back more. But now that I'm thinking about Craig touching my chest... it definitely feels better than the back but he couldn't do that. _I_ couldn't. I can barely handle what we've been doing. It's pretty hard to be around him sometimes. When we make out especially, I really have to pace myself. Craig doesn't seem to mind going my speed.

I kinda wanna just bone because maybe then it wouldn't affect me as much.

Craig naked though? It's harder to handle just because I thought he was straight for so long and it's so weird. It's too weird. What if he isn't ready? I mean he says he's gay but all I've heard is of a blow job from Thomas (fuck Thomas). So, what if he isn't comfortable? What if he says he is but he isn't? What if I'm ugly?

Wendy sits down at the table causing it to become quiet. I feel like at this point Bebe should've greeted her or something. Since she doesn't, I almost do but then Bebe continues, "And then on Christmas after everyone's done with family, we can come to my house and roasts s'mores and open our gifts by the fire, you know?" She smiles excitedly. "We're gonna have so much fun!"

It's so weird. I don't know what happened but it's very apparent Wendy's been shunned by Bebe. And it only took that for the rest of the girls to shun her too. It probably has something to do with her cheating, not that I care or anything. I'll have to ask Bebe later.

The bell rings and I die inside.

The rest of my classes go by too fast. Before I know it I'm at my locker accompanied by Kenny. "You look distracted."

"Can you not be creepy today, Ken?" I shove all my shit in my locker even though I know I have homework because, guess what. I'm not doing it. I'm not even gonna bother. I know I'm not gonna do it.

"If Craig's bothering you, you can tell me."

"Wow," I stop and turn to him. "We really took a leap there, Kenny. How did we go from distracted to my new boyfriend sucks?"

Kenny shrugs. "I'm just saying. Don't let him push you around because he's scary and cute."

"I don't even know what that means?" How would Craig 'push me around'? He's an ass but we're mostly joking around.

"I don't know," Kenny groans, ruffing his hair around. "Just don't let him make you do anything you don't want to or whatever."

"You make it sound like I'm in an abusive relationship."

"Wow, thanks."

Kenny laughs at my mortified expression and keels over. Craig approaches from behind me like some kind of creeper. It's really his fault for joining the conversation at such an unflattering time.

"That wasn't- There was a beginning part to that sentence that really puts things into context."

Craig rolls his eyes. His hand drops onto my head. "Ok, whatever, fine." He glances at Kenny, who's catching his breath. "Hey, Kenny."

"Hey," Kenny smiles.

"Are you ready?" he asks, looking to me now.

"Uh, yeah, I guess." I was in the middle of talking to Kenny but since Craig's my ride, I can't really tell him when we leave.

"Tweek, oh, my god" Bebe pushes past Kenny and grabs my arm. "You gotta come home with me. We need to girl talk."

"But he's not a girl," Craig says.

He's ignored. Bebe presses her hand to her forehead. "I'm so stressed. I need a frappuccino," she says. "My fucking skin is gonna break out."

"Bebe," I say.

"_Please_, Tweek? What else are you gonna do? And I know something's bothering you too. So just come. We can get ice cream!"

Ice cream and coffee?) Say no more. "Alright, Bebe." I knew I wasn't doing homework tonight.

I shut my locker and look around quickly before kissing Craig. Then I realize I'm kind of bailing on him. "Sorry," I tell him. "We were supposed to hang out..."

Craig smiles and shrugs, looking at my closed locker. "They weren't official plans, Tweek. Hang out with your friends. It's fine," he tells me. Then he leans down to kiss me again. This time he puts both of his hands on my face and neck and presses into me. "But I get to have you all break," he says quietly before letting me go. I flush and twitch and stutter. "Alright. See you later." He walks off the way he came and I watch him until he's gone.

"Ok-Okay, we can go, Bebe."

When I look back, Bebe's grinning. "Sure thing," she says.

"Bye, Kenny." Then I realize I'm bailing on Kenny. We were in the middle of a conversation.

But he's already walking. He smiles and waves. "See ya, Tweek."

Bebe and I walk to her car. As soon as she's in with the door shut she sighs. "Sorry about stealing you from your friends like that but I just really didn't want to be alone today."

"It's fine, Bebe," I tell her. Otherwise I would've just made out with Craig which isn't bad it's just less important than if my friend needs me. Not that Craig is less important.

"I don't know. I just- Maybe I'm too invasive, you know? I'm trying to not be so much but with like, my friends. It's hard. It's just who I am."

"It doesn't bother me," I tell her honestly. "It works for you."

She smiles, "Thanks, Tweek."

As we're driving out of school we get stopped at a light. Craig's in the car next to us so against my protests, Bebe honks her horn and waves and blows kisses.

Craig puffs hot air on his window until it fogs and then he draws a heart and an arrow through it. I bury myself in my hands. Luckily the light changes before she has a chance to roll the window down.

She sighs, sitting back in her seat. "That is just great. You two are everything. So cute," she says. I mean, I guess. Craig is. I'm too awkward but he makes up for me because he is so damn handsome.

I blush just thinking about his stupid face. "What're you thinking about?" Bebe asks.

"Craig," I mumble. It should be obvious. Craig would've known what I was thinking about.

"Why do you say it like that?"

"I don't know." We're already almost to Bebe's house. I stare out the window to the turn that leads to Craig's neighborhood. "I don't feel confident in this relationship," I admit.

Bebe doesn't act surprise or shocked. She simply asks, "What'd you mean?"

"Well," I start. "We kiss and stuff and it's nice and he's nice. He acts like a boyfriend should but I don't feel like he's my boyfriend."

"I can tell you haven't fucked and I can tell you're totally uncomfortable with that."

"Yeah, but _what part_? That we haven't? Or _the idea_ of us... doing it."

"I don't know, Tweek. You tell me."

"_I don't know_! It's not like it's my first time. Why would Craig different? Why do I think about it so much? Why am I so scared of it?"

"If you're not ready, then you're not ready."

"He's just so..." intimidating. Scary. "He's nice to me but..." I know he can be mean and I really don't want him to be mean to me. _Really_ mean. "What if he doesn't like it...?" What if that's his eye opening moment that he isn't in fact gay and is just confused or questioning? "What if he thinks I'm ugly?"

Bebe laughs. "Dude, you love him!"

"Bebe, quit joking."

"You're just insecure because Craig's so hot and he's not like Kenny. He's more reserved and mysterious. You don't want it to ruin the relationship you have."

I stare at Bebe. She's right. "What should I do?"

She laughs again, harder this time. "Throw it back and rock his fucking world. What do you mean?"

"Bebe!" My face heats. "I can't do that!"

"Why not? What's the problem?"

I cover my face. "I can't be the one to start it and I can't tell him I want to."

"Why?"

"Ugh," I glare at her. "The same reason you couldn't talk to Clyde? I don't know."

"Oh," she nods. We pull into her driving. She looks thoughtful. "Well you don't have to spell it out for him. Just let him know what you want, right? It worked for me and Clyde so, take your own advice."

"Nobody ever takes their own advice."

"Then write it down and put it somewhere you know he'll see it." I actually consider this. And then I stop myself to ask myself _why_ I would consider that!

"What would it say? _My body's ready for you_? What if he doesn't even want to?"

"Tweek," Bebe tells me, "he's a guy. He wants to. _Well_-" she pauses. "Why? Did something happen?"

Her pause makes me uneasy because that means she thought of a reason Craig wouldn't want to have sex with me. "No," I say and then I stop. "There was one time I was getting turned on so I told him to stop." Bebe gaps at me. "What?"

"_You haven't even seen his dick yet_? You haven't even seen each other's boners yet?" Bebe starts laughing again and laughs all the way to the front door. She unlocks it. "I'm not saying you love him but you clearly care if something like this is a problem."

"Is that bad? I just don't want him to think I'm gross."

Bebe gives me a half smile, "Next time, Tweek, let yourself get a boner and let me know if Craig calls you gross for it."

We walk inside. Bebe's house is nice and makes me feel insecure about her seeing my house now that I know how nice hers is.

"I think Craig is pretty confident with what he wants and I also think that you are what he's decided he's wants."

"What makes you say that though?"

"Tweet, are you blind?" She chuckles. "It's just obvious- the way he looks at you."

My brow furrows. "Craig doesn't look at me. When he does it's nothing special."

"Okay," she says. "You don't see it because you're insecure but now that you know about it I bet you'll notice it." She drops her stuff "Let's go to my room."

We head upstairs. Bebe changes into her work clothes and starts braiding her hair.

"So, what did you want to talk about? Is it Wendy? I know it's Wendy."

Bebe's whole demeanor drops. "Oh, my God, Tweek," she says turning to me. "You and Craig? Absolutely adorable. I love it. You clearly are fond of Craig just as he is of you and it's not complicated. But, Wendy? I never thought she was a bitch until she started seeing Eric- that's what she calls him- _Eric_."

"And Stan?"

"She doesn't know what she wants. I don't think she should be with either of them honestly. She needs to figure herself out first."

"Did something happen between you two though? At lunch it seemed very tense."

"Oh, absolutely. I've been nothing but kind to her and she gets mad at me for disagreeing with her morals. I don't really care, I guess. It doesn't affect me but the blow out is gonna be killer. And as a Pisces I'm trying to fix the problem before it happens. I don't want Stan to get hurt or Wendy. Stan doesn't deserve that. And Wendy's the one that told me. What she's doing is messed up."

"Right," I say.

She finishes her makeup and grabs her nail bag coming over to the bed and sitting next to me. "I buff when I'm anxious," she says before grabbing my hand. "And you could use a touch up." She buffs my nails quickly and with ease since they're short there's not much she can do with it. Then she puts a base coat. "Other than that, is Craig amazing or what? I want details."

I shrug. "He just drives me around a lot. He's drives very well." Even Bebe scares me sometimes. "We usually just watch movies- Actually, we start movies and we eat a lot and kiss and get distracted somehow. One time we painted together. That was fun. We didn't finish- we ended up kissing..."

"And is it Craig or you initiating these kisses?"

"Mm, I don't remember."

Bebe laughs. "Asshole."

"Craig," I tell her. It's actually pretty evenly split between us. But Craig always does it first. Like it's part of his routine or something. Get ready, get in the car, pick Tweek up, kiss Tweek hello... Same for most goodbyes. Mine are timid but demand more.

"And you think he thinks you're ugly?"

I shrug. "Kissing's different. You can kiss people all day. But I have a penis, Bebe. Not a vagina."

"Didn't you say he was gay?"

"Well, yeah-"

"Did he tell you he was gay?"

"Yeah, he-"

"So, he came out to you?"

"Yes."

"Only you?"

"No, his mom knows-"

"_His mom knows_," Bebe says in shock.

"Allegedly," I add.

"What the fuck, Tweek? Do you think he's _lying_? He didn't say he was bicurious. He said he was gay. Like, dick sucking gay."

"I just don't know..."

"You can't denounce his gayness, Tweek. That's fucked up. Is he not gay enough for you?" This time Bebe laughs.

Then she says while finishing my last nail, "I've talked to Craig and I've talked to Kenny and I've talked to Clyde." She screws the pale pink nail polish shut. Pale pink with rainbow glitter. How fitting. "And if that's what you're worried about Tweek, then trust me, as your friend, I don't think you should worry about it," she tells me. "But of course," she says, "don't do anything that makes you uncomfortable. Done. Wanna watch a movie before I have work?"

"Okay." That's when I started planning.


	16. NDTF

"So," I say. "You're gonna be gone for another week?"

"Yes. I know how you hate it when we leave you here and it's so close to Christmas. I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

Usually, this would infuriate me. My parents had planned a trip to Denver. "It's fine, mom! Denver is great. Even Bebe and some of my friends are going there for Christmas shopping. But, who's gonna drive?"

My mother claps, excitedly, "Aunt Diane is taking us! It's a family trip."

How is that a family trip? Aren't we the family. "O- Oh, awesome."

"Will you be okay by yourself?"

"Y- Yes! There's still food in the fridge and I'm on break so I'll probably just sleep."

"Well, okay," my mom says. She kisses my head.

Who needs a whole week for Christmas shopping? I wonder if they'll even remember to shop while they're there. I don't care if they do or don't. My parents will be gone for the first week of break. It's almost perfect… Unless, they decide to come home early like that one time.

Now, I have time and a place. For my plan. My plan is sleeping with Craig. Since he's my boyfriend, it shouldn't be difficult in theory. I had even bought new lube and condoms. Just in case mine were too old. They weren't when I checked but I've had them a while so I got new ones anyways.

I was in the drug store in a black hood and some sunglasses. It was so embarrassing. But I couldn't ask Kenny to get them this time because he would know why I wanted them. That's not really a problem. It's just possibly more embarrassing than buying them myself. Because at least then it's people I'll (hopefully) never see again.

It made it worse knowing I was buying them for Craig. _Pleasure_. _Sensitivity_. _Snugger fit_. I was so worked up I could barely speak to the cashier. I didn't want to. She knew what I was planning to do and that was way too much pressure.

I wondered if I should light candles. But being scared that it would be too much, I settled for having them around, just in case. I made my bed. Twice. I think it should look nice.

As soon as my parents were gone, the house was clean, and I deemed myself presentable… enough, I sat on the couch and I stared at my phone.

This is the first time I'm calling Craig. He always calls me. To let me knows he's on his way in the morning, to see if I'm free, to annoy the shit out of me… but I've never really had a reason to call him. And the first time I do, it's a booty call. Isn't that what this is? I'm not calling him over to have sex, I just plan to do it while he's here.

I try to act casual on the phone with Craig, but he's being difficult.

"You should come over."

"_I'm actually really busy today_," he told me. "_We have all break to hang out_."

He flat out rejected me. Surely, he's joking. "Yeah," I say. "But..." _That's true but I want to hang out with you right now, idiot._

"_But?_" Craig says. "_What is it, Tweek?_"

My blood boils. "You're such a bastard." He just wants to hear me say it.

"_Unless it's vital for me to be there right now_\- "

"It's not…"

"_Oh, so you should be fine_."

It's not about whether or not I'll be fine. "Don't be an asshole, C."

"_I'm being an asshole?_"

"Okay, fine. My parents left, I just thought you'd rather me invite you over and not Bebe or something but, clearly you're very busy."

"_Wait, you're parents left?_" he asks. "_Again? It's only been a few weeks_."

"Yeah but whatever, I'll just call Bebe."

"_I'll be over in half an hour._"

"You just said-"

"_Well, if you had told me you just wanted to see me, that's pretty damn vital, Tweek_."

"What?"

"_Alright, bye. Driving and using your phone isn't safe._ " What a load of bullshit coming from Craig. I know that asshole using his phone while driving because I've ridden in his car.

I was left to frantically run around making sure the house was clean and I was clean and looked good. I wore the jeans Bebe gave me and did my hair the best I could. It's of course only seconds before Craig is knocking on my door that I panic and start reconsidering. Should I be taking advice from Bebe?

Craig doesn't even wait for me to get to the door. He walks in, "You should really lock the door if you're home alone." He struts into my house and goes straight to the kitchen. He opens the fridge. "Damn, your mom left you a lot of food. Are these like, precooked meals?"

I glare at him. He fails to even notice me. "Are these pork chops? I knew I was right to not bring food. I love your mom. I wish my mom cooked. I'm gonna heat this up for us. Wait, have you eaten?"

Craig finally looks at me. He smirks, "You look nice." I blush. I hate how he catches me off guard. "Any reason?"

Fuck. This was a _terrible_ idea. I'm gonna have a panic attack. I wasn't ready. Fuck Craig, _I_ wasn't ready. And since when do I listen to Bebe? It's not about wrapping people around fucking fingers and making myself desirable. It never was.

I miss the part where Craig walks over to me because of how distracted I am. Now he's right in front of me. He leans near my ear, "_Did you get dressed up for me?_"

My heart skips four beats. This is all too much.

His fingers graze the small of my back and I shiver. He traces up my spines slowly. I sharply inhale and close my eyes. My hearts too fast. Craig's gonna know something's up.

His other hand creeps up my side until my stomach is showing completely. Craig continues to raise my shirt over my head and off of my body. I don't know what he's doing but it's really fucking up my rotation. I had a plan. And it didn't start in the kitchen. What if it happens down here and all the necessary tools are upstairs?

Craig's lips leave wet kisses on my neck and it's so hard to focus. I just want to melt but I can't. His hand returns to my back gently pushing me into him more.

"You're sensitive," he points out. Then he moves my face and kisses me smoothly. His hand slides down my arm, up my back, and down my back again, landing somewhere right above my butt.

Craig's tongue enters my mouth. Fuck. He makes me feel okay. I feel almost fine. I break away from the kiss to laugh. He distracted me with a kiss, enough to where I literally couldn't think about my anxiety anymore. He's like Xanax. I laugh more. What was I even worrying about?

Craig doesn't say anything about me laughing and just brushes his thumb over my bottom lip. When I look at him he's not looking at me he's looking at my lips and his eyes make my stomach tighten. Was that the look Bebe mentioned? His eyes quickly lock onto mine so I can't really analyze it.

"What are you doing?"

"You said your parents were gone."

I'm not sure what this explains. Actually it explains nothing and that's it. Typical. What exactly is he planning to do?

Craig continues to kiss me until I part again. "Craig."

"Mm," he hums, inches from my face.

"Uh..." _Can we have sex? I want to fuck you. Please break my bed._ No. _Let's take this upstairs_. Hell no. "Never mind!" I squeak, covering my face. What am I thinking? Am I insane? I've been hanging out with Bebe too much. I shouldn't take all the advice she gives me. There's no way I could ever voice that to Craig. I need another way.

Craig's staring again with a different look. One I can't read and those are the worst.

"Okay," he says. He let's go of my waist and hands me my shirt before heading back over to the forgotten food. "Have you eaten?" I shake my head. "I'm gonna make this."

"... Okay."

I watch him for a while but he doesn't speak so eventually I walk upstairs to my room. I check myself in the bathroom first quickly. I still look okay. I could still pull this off, maybe, if I can keep it together.

Now what am I supposed to do? I could just get undressed and be naked when he got here, which would be fine with me, if he had seen me naked before but he hasn't. I could... I could try to make him hard? I would get hard before Craig would get hard that's for sure. But, maybe if I got hard, it would make him get hard in turn. Would that be embarrassing if he didn't though? Yeah…

When Craig does enter my room, he brings food and I'm grateful. It's like he came here to take care of me. People are always taking care of me.

He's was probably just hungry.

"How's your break been so far?" He sits on my bed next to me.

"It only started yesterday," I tell him.

"So how was yesterday?" He rephrases.

I shrug, settling into my bed comfortably. Craig turns the TV on and starts a movie. I like that he does this without any instructions. I'm so indecisive and I like that Craig feel comfortable in my house.

"I slept in, I drew, I ate and slept some more."

"Are your parents good?"

I make a face. "Yeah. I mean, I think so. Why are you asking about my parents?"

"You seem like something's wrong," he says casually. When he sees my confusion he explains, "Tense, nervous, jumpy. More so than usual. Thought maybe you had a fight with your parents or something and that's why you called me."

I snort. How cute. Craig glances back to the TV. I almost don't know what to say. "My parents are fine," I tell him.

"Okay," he says. "So what is it then?"

I scoff. "Wh- What are- I- Nothing. I have anxiety. That's normal. I don't really even know what you mean."

Craig turns to me and I stop. He narrows his eyes at me and my pulse picks up. He reaches for my arm and my pulse skyrockets. Craig's hand stops. "Are you on something?"

"Fuck you. I'm not on anything, asshole!"

"Then let me touch you."

My face turns red. "What are you talking about?" I shift away from him but Craig creeps closer.

"If you're fine then come here."

"What're you gonna do?" I stammer.

He smirks, "What do you want me to do?" I cover my face with my hands. I can still feel him moving but it's better somehow sightless. I can tell he's close. "Craig," I try but my voice is so frail.

He probably thinks I'm just saying his name and not trying to get his attention. He kisses my neck again and I give in immediately. My shirt's gone even faster this time. Before I know it Craig's on top of me and we're kissing. My heart feels like it might explode and I'll die. Just like this, which I would feel bad for Craig mostly if it did. Kissed to death.

He kisses my collar and I almost lose my breath. He's watching me but I can't look at him. His hands play at the waist of my jeans.

"Craig," I try again.

"Hm?"

"Can- You can- ugh," I groan, blushing. Craig watches me amused. "I just mean- You could- if you wanted to-"

"Wanted to what?" His lips press to my neck and his finger wraps around my jean and inside.

"_Mm_, uh," I sigh and grab his hand bringing it to my chest and guiding his thumb over my nipple. "It's okay," I say, "I want you to." Am I making any sense? I'm really flustered.

"That's all you had to say," he says with a chuckle and then that's where Craig's hands are. He brushes over them with his thumb until they're hard and then he rolls them between his fingers.

It's feels so good. I want to lay like this forever, under him with his hands touching me, with his lips on me, with his scent everywhere around me. It feels _too_ good.

Craig starts kissing my neck again and that's when the last leg of the table breaks and everything collapses. I found myself taking Bebe's advice again and even thinking that just _sounds_ like it's a bad idea.

I started getting hard, but I just let it happen until I was throbbing in my jeans and pressed against Craig's leg. There was no way he didn't know. However, instead of saying anything or reacting to it, Craig just grabs my ass, causing me to press into him harder. My toes curl. "Really sensitive today," he mumbles into my shoulder._ He doesn't even care_. I could sigh a million sighs of relief. I wrap my leg around him. I want Craig so bad right now he has no idea. I just need to know we're on the same page.

"Craig." Has Craig just been waiting for my green light? Those are the best parts about him; that even though Craig acts like he's a dick, he's really pretty polite.

Craig grinds me against him again and I moan into my hand. There's nothing I can really do. Craig's mouth is to my neck, climbing slowly to my ear, one hand is on my ass and the other is holding him above me. Mine stay on his back, lifting his shirt.

"Craig, I want you," I basically whine. _Need_ would better describe it. I haven't had sex in months and this is the first time I'm really thinking about it.

But this makes Craig stop. _Stop_. My eyes snap open, sad and confused. _Annoyed_ would better describe it. "Wha-"

"Like, sex?"

I blush. Duh, asshole! "M- Yeah?"

"Is that why you've been so nervous?"

My brows furrow. This is why he stopped? Is Craig more psychic than Kenny? And if Craig were Kenny, would Kenny have stopped me? I need to stop mixing Kenny with my romantic thoughts. It's not a good look on me. "_No_, so stop stopping." I grab him to pull him back. But he pushes me off. I roll my eyes. "Okay. Yes. So, what?"

"_So, what?_ Is that the whole reason you called me?"

"I really don't see the problem with that either though." Even though it's not exactly true.

Craig looks around. "Is that why there are red candles in your room now?"

"Okay, well, that's- Yes, but, when you say it like that..." It sounds a hundred times more embarrassing.

"Did you plan this?"

"It was gonna happen anyways. I wanted it to happen now." There's nothing wrong with that!

"Did you? The way you were acting makes it seem like you aren't ready."

"Well, I am."

Craig gauges me. "Absolutely not," he decides.

"_What_?" My heart sinks.

"No," he repeats.

"W-Why- Why not?"

"Because I want it to be special and planning it isn't bad but you're clearly internally freaking out about it. What if we do it and then you don't like me anymore? I don't wanna ruin anything."

I gap at him. Bastard! I shake my head. Why do I feel slightly relieved? "Well, that's just fucking great because now I have a boner."

"We don't have to have sex to take care of that," Craig whispers, kissing my ear. "I kinda like hearing you beg."

"I was not _begging_."

"Why didn't you just talk to me about it?"

He nips at my earlobe. Why is he trying to have a conversation with me while also kissing me? "That- _Mm, uh_\- should be obvious."

"What does that mean?" He sits back on his knees. "I want you to feel like you can be honest with me."

"Doesn't make it any less embarrassing, Craig."

"I guess," he says. I'm worried he's stopping again but his hands go to my jeans. I just watch him because surely he isn't just going to-

Craig starts unbuttoning my jeans and all the blood in my body that isn't below my waist goes to my face. Is he trying to get me naked before he's even taken anything off? I don't even think Craig's hard right now.

I think I should just let Craig take care of me, how I let Kenny take care of me. If that's not a big deal, then neither is this. But I don't want to think about Kenny right now.

So I let my head fall back and rest against my pillow and Craig strips me of my jeans. And then he's back over me. His hand glides down my stomach. "I bet I could make you come without even touching you." Oh, there's no doubt but please don't do that.

Craig's hands travel the expanse of my stomach. I'm almost clinging to him. He bites my neck and then my collar and then takes my nipple in his mouth. "_Fuck_." Ah, my weakness. His hand starts to lower my boxers. His gets them mid-thigh. I kick them off. He takes me in his hand and my eyes flutter shut.

His tongue drags over my skin and his fingers wrap around me tightly. I pant, peering at him through half lidded eyes. And I gotta be honest, I could be seeing something better. I reach for his shirt again, tugging until it gets caught at his arms. He stops and sits up to take it off, going right back to what he was doing.

Now, I can see Craig's shoulders and his stomach and a little bit of his back. I let my hands follow his curves. His hand moves on me and he bites down on my chest gently. I writhe. This is so bad. I'm not gonna last long. It's entirely his fault.

"I'm close."

Craig takes my mouth with his and his hand moves faster. I arch into him as I come. But he pumps through it. I could die. Why are my eyes watering?

Craig sits back. I don't even really notice. I pant. What I do know is I'm naked and Craig isn't and I really don't want him to look at me naked while he isn't. So I toss my cover over me. Craig's doing something, I think. I don't know, I'm falling asleep.

"Tweek."

Fucking hell. I sigh, opening my eyes. "What?" I try not to sound annoyed.

"Do I make you uncomfortable?"

"You just jacked me off Craig. What could you possibly do to make me uncomfortable?"

"I don't know. You just like, pulled the blanket over yourself pretty quickly."

"Yeah, 'cause I don't want you staring at me naked."

"Why not? I'm your boyfriend."

"Stop saying that. It's weird."

"But true?"

"Yes. So?"

"So, I should be able to see you naked."

I roll my eyes and then I narrow them. "Are you sadistic?"

Craig laughs at this. He laughs really loudly. "No. Is it that embarrassing?"

Well, with this logic… "Then let me see you naked?"

Craig smirks. "You want to?"

"You didn't even get hard. That's not fair."

"You looked tired. I could tell you were gonna pass out."

"Well, I'm not passed out now."

"Are you asking me to get naked? Because I'll get naked if you get naked."

"Stop saying naked. I hate you. You are so obnoxious."

"You're cute when you're embarrassed."

"Jackass," I throw the remote at him but can't help my smile.

Craig starts unbuttoning his pants and I start screaming. "No! Wait, wait, wait, wait! Please, wait!" He stops, laughing. "I can't. I'm not ready."

He laughs, "What is that?"

"Deals off. No."

"Okay," he says snickering. "I could just do this anyways." He grabs the covers but I grab them too. I start screaming again.

"Stop being an ass! This is why I don't call you my boyfriend! Why would you give me a choice and then revoke it?!"

"Because it's funnier this way."

Craig finally stops when I pretend to almost cry. It's kinda payback for that time he pretended to be hurt. Then I grabbed my boxers and threw them on under the cover.

"I could just take them off," he says. I don't even blush because I know he's just mad he lost.

"You must really think I'm a crybaby."

"Whether you are or not, I don't want to make you cry."

"Wow, Craig, you're such a gentleman."

"I know."

We laugh.

* * *

_So y'all really gonna leave this story at 99 follows … (but holy shit 99 follows though)_


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